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Old 06-21-2011, 01:48 PM
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Default Letting go (non-attachment & love)

A story to begin:

A story about non-attachment & loving relationships


Jack & Jill

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...7753#post87753
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Last edited by River; 06-21-2011 at 01:50 PM.
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Old 06-22-2011, 01:03 AM
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Whadaya mean, non-attachment and love?!? What a load of crap! >flipping channels<
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Old 06-22-2011, 03:59 AM
AutumnalTone AutumnalTone is offline
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Interesting. I'm not certain letting go is the thing so much as holding onto one's self is. If one can hold on--firmly--to a sense of self-worth, then the bad person stories lose their power.
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When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.

While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.
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Old 06-22-2011, 01:46 PM
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Default Compassionate Ocean

Quote:
Originally Posted by AutumnalTone View Post
Interesting. I'm not certain letting go is the thing so much as holding onto one's self is. If one can hold on--firmly--to a sense of self-worth, then the bad person stories lose their power.
Thank you for the opportunity to examine a crucial distinction (in my own heart and mind), AT. As I read your comment, I looked carefully at the words. Initially, you have "holding onto one's self," and a little later holding on to "self-worth".

What I am actually experiencing, and practicing, is the letting go of myself, while allowing the fullness of my value / worth / essence to emerge in my life. Holding onto myself has caused me nothing but pain and suffering, and I'm so tired of it that I want to let myself go, entirely.

Paradoxically, letting myself go doesn't mean that I'm becoming more boundary-diffuse in an unhealthy way. It's true that we need good "boundaries" in order to function well in relationships of every kind. I'm becoming no less assertive -- though my assertiveness is much more tender than it used to be. I'm becoming no less committed to things. I'm not really losing anything of what I am in letting myself go. Rather, what I am is emerging as a joyful, growing freedom. By letting myself go I am becoming who and what I am. I'm allowing astonishing wonderous life to tease me ever more open and kind and truthful and couragious.... This process is so freaking marvelous and healing and good that I wish it upon everyone! I wish
clouds would rain this upon all of us! Wet us down with letting ourselves go.

It looks to me that when I or anyone let ourselves go, in this way, our self-worth grows by leaps and bounds. Because we are not a thimble full of water in need of protection; we are the very Ocean itself.
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Old 06-22-2011, 02:04 PM
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It seems to me this post
helps flesh out the implications of what I said in my most recent post in this thread.
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