Poly Marriage Legality

I came here with a simple question, if homosexual marriage is legal, why is polyamorous? I'm mostly talking about triads, because a V would basically just be getting married twice without a divorce, but this is for them, too.

Is there anything in the bible against polyamory? I'm not saying I've read the bible cover to cover, but I've never come across anything against multiple people in a relationship. Also, Matthew: 7.

By the time I get married I want poly marriage legalized, is that too much to ask? I don't plan on getting married in the next five years, so it won't be that hard.

Who else agrees that poly marriage isn't that hard to legalize or accept? In fact, take mormons. Poly is very for religion, so shut yer face.

lafayettejeffersona said:

Who else agrees that poly marriage isn't that hard to legalize or accept? In fact, take mormon.

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The LDS church (mainstream Mormons) banned polygamy in 1904.

"No matter what you have seen on television or what you’ve heard about “Mormons,” it’s not true that the mainstream LDS church promotes the practice of polygamy as part of its religion. In fact, any member of the LDS church who is found by church leaders to be practicing polygamy will be immediately excommunicated. The LDS church is so eager to make it clear that it does not practice polygamy, that even children of polygamists cannot be baptized into the mainstream church unless and until they are adults and they disavow the practice of polygamy."

lafayettejeffersona said:

By the time I get married I want poly marriage legalized

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First question: Why?

For what exact reason(s) do you feel this ought to occur?

I am sure it will take more than five years for poly marriage to be legalized. Although I'm sure that it will happen eventually.

Ravenscroft said:

First question: Why?

For what exact reason(s) do you feel this ought to occur?

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If I ever get in a poly relationship I would much prefer to be legally married to all of my spouses, rather than just married to one. Also, if I had to choose between which signif to marry it would kinda seem like favoritism.

kdt26417 said:

I am sure it will take more than five years for poly marriage to be legalized. Although I'm sure that it will happen eventually.

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I think (and am in favor of) marriage will be abolished as a government sanctioned entity and everything will go to private contracts before poly marriage becomes legally sanctioned.

I find either scenario unlikely to happen.

lafayettejeffersona said:

I came here with a simple question, if homosexual marriage is legal, why is polyamorous?

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Marriage is typically acknowledged as a contract between two people. Even when Abraham was with Hagar, Sarah was still his wife. Hagar's purpose alone was to bear Abraham a child, although I'd like to imagine that he truly did have feelings for her. He must have if he created a child with her.

So, to answer your question, polyamorous is something coming to light in recent years and hasn't really had any focus. Homosexual marriage is something a large group of individuals fought to achieve and it took a few families to finally push it through to Supreme Court. Open homosexuality seems to be more common than open polyamory.

lafayettejeffersona said:

Is there anything in the bible against polyamory? I'm not saying I've read the bible cover to cover, but I've never come across anything against multiple people in a relationship.

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There's more in the Bible about having multiple partners. There was always a wife and it was okay to have concubines. King Solomon had hundreds, but it was also noted that this displeased the Lord.

Granted, this is the Bible and there are many contradictions throughout the entire text, cover to cover, but to each their own.

lafayettejeffersona said:

By the time I get married I want poly marriage legalized, is that too much to ask? I don't plan on getting married in the next five years, so it won't be that hard.

Who else agrees that poly marriage isn't that hard to legalize or accept?

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For something like this to happen, there needs to be a demand from the people to start the process. It won't be overnight and it won't be easy, but it's possible. Anything is possible in a democracy... people just have to have a voice.

lafayettejeffersona said:

In fact, take mormons. Poly is very for religion, so shut yer face.

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I don't understand what you are saying in this statement.

It's funny because the eventual legalization of poly marriage is a recurring argument by the Christian Right against gay marriage. The question of whether or not the Bible condones it shouldn't even be relevant. Paul, which much of modern day western christianity is based on, says people should not get married at all (1 Cor 7). Basically Paul says people should only get married to have sex.

Well, let's see...

There's religious marriage, then there's legalistic marriage, then there's the contractual model.

There's NOTHING preventing multiple marriages in a religion. We've done Wiccan handfastings for years without a government contract. You can have however many people involved as you desire. And we even created a "parting of the ways" ceremony, because we're not as stupid as we look.

As far as governmental marriage... well, it's complicated.

Maybe it was in the brilliant book The Marriage Contract: Spouses, Lovers & the Law, by Lenore Weitzman. IMNSHO, anyone who wants to venture in that direction ought to have read this book, & I doubt that anyone here ever has. Anyway, someone once described the standard Certificate Of Marriage as "the most insidious business contract ever created." You sign your life away -- pretty much literally -- on something smaller than a half-page of standard copier paper.

And ANY OTHER contract is going to be longer. That oughat be a HUUUUGE red flag.

Here's a question: if poly marriage were legalized, how then would we have poly divorce?

I'll explain. If "poly marriage" follows the monogamous form, you'd simply sign your names, pay the registration fee, have it witnessed appropriately & TAA-DAA the Government has blessed you.

For one thing, I REFUSE to let the government have ANY SUCH control over who I love. YMMV.

Let's say I were to marry into a clade of five people. All of us sign the contract.

But, heck, crap happens, & I need to leave. That means that I'd have to pay for FIVE divorces.

At least.

Because the case could be made that I might ALSO have to divorce all possible triads... all the quads... & of course the quint.

Though it'll be denounced as "unRomantic," I prefer a raw business model based on extant partnership laws. There are provisions (albeit state-by-state variants) to remove a partner from a partnership, willingly or not. This includes settling assets AND liabilities. For instance, you might marry someone, realize after a few months that this was A Bad Idea, & move him along... at cost of a reasonable share of assets & holdings of ALL people involved.

After all, you're all adults, & if that isn't what you intended, well, you deserve to pay the toll, as the courts will happily tell you.

Right?



Yah, we've been looking into this since 1983. It sucks. If you can't ETS, best to stay away entirely.

lafayettejeffersona said:

"In fact, take mormons. Poly is very for religion, so shut yer face."

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minnegander said:

"I don't understand what you are saying in this statement."

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kdt26417 says:
I think it's an allusion to the stereotype of a Mormon man with multiple wives. (If by "Mormon" we mean "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints," that church did indeed practice patriarchal polygyny, and called it polygamy or plural marriage. The practice was discontinued in 1890/1904, but some people broke away from the church, formed their own church, such as the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and continued to practice "polygamy." So if by "Mormon" we mean one of these "breakaway" churches, then we can say there are Mormons who practice polygamy even today. In that sense poly is "for" religion.)