Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #111  
Old 11-23-2013, 09:10 AM
kdt26417's Avatar
kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
Official Greeter
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Olympia, Washington
Posts: 4,769
Default

Well first of all, what would you say the point is? Is it that we need to talk more about culture, and less about skin color? Is it additionally that all individuals are unique people and can't be expected to conform to some stereotype about their "race?"

Re: skin tones ... I do know that "blacks" are usually anything but black, so to be be scientific I'm exploiting the word black to mean "all sorts of shades of brown, from nearly peach-ish all the way to literally black but most often a basic shade of brown."

I do know that "whites" are virtually never "white" per se (except perhaps albinos?). "White" skin is usually some unique admixture of pink, red, tan, peach, orange, etc.

All these "color names," while being derived originally from color concepts, are by now mostly used in a loose fashion to signify a race rather than an exact color. But I guess we could adopt terms like "brown-skinned" and "fair-skinned" at least when talking about the actual skin tones on people.

And what "color name" does a child of mixed-race ancestry receive? I have no idea. "Mixed race" I guess.

Re:
Quote:
"When you talk about the people in your neighborhood, what are you talking about? Were they brought up in an 'American culture:' What part of 'America?' Did they have any other influences to their upbringing: Where did these influences come from: their aunt, their grandmother, etc.: Were these influences from a different country: What part of that country: What culture was it? These are the kinds of questions that need to be answered ..."
Don't the answers to the above questions vary from one individual to the next, regardless of their race? So again, it sounds to me like the point is that all people are unique and individual and not necessarily at all a product of their "stereotypical racial culture."

Re:
Quote:
"... Saying that "they" are "black" or "white" is just confusing and it really is NOT saying anything at all!"
If you don't mind, I'm seeing a lot of bold, caps, italics, italicized bold, underlined bold -- even quotes in a seemingly sarcastic context. It looks aggressive, as if you can only get the point through our thick skulls with a sledgehammer and a long thick nail. It would help us restore a civil discourse if you could take it down a notch. Just as shouting doesn't make your audience smarter, strident emphasis doesn't make your audience smarter either. The only way to get through to a dense audience is to try to get down on their level, think like they think, and communicate with them in terms and a dialect that they can relate to and understand. I can see that it's frustrating, but it's the best way to get what you want.

I guess we need to start talking about brown-skinned people that we know. Unfortunately for me, I hardly know any (especially in the here and now). The few I ever got to know all lived in Detroit. And I never got to know them well enough to hear about what influenced their upbringing, aunts, grandmothers, etc.; I think their background was strictly American but it's possible some may have had some foreign influence in their background.

I guess my failure to get to know them better left me with a "stereotypical" impression. They seemed very American and African-American with little or no influence from other countries. One thing I think I learned, though, is that "the classic brown-skinned race stereotype" is widely (by quite a few fair-skinned persons) viewed as negative, toxic, a drain on our country, etc. ... whereas I learned to see that "classic stereotype" as positive, natural, and full of hope for a better tomorrow. I've mentioned how much I love a good laugh. Well me and these particular Detroit natives shared that love in spades. We ribbed each other a lot and had great fun doing so. These folks weren't looking for any offensive thing I might say so they could pounce on it. They got that I was "fair-skinned and from the stereotypical Utah culture," and they tolerated and accepted that in me.

I just hope I can help brown-skinned (and any-color-skinned, from any culture) persons feel as welcome amongst "the majority race" (e.g. fair-skinned) as they made me feel. The blacks I knew back then were wonderfully selfless and warmly giving, the kind of folks who'd adopt you (no matter your color) as their family upon first meeting you (and they'd let you know in no uncertain terms that you were to agree to the adoption!).

So I guess given that -- my experience -- I actually feel brown-skinned and fair-skinned cultures in America have much hope for a vast commingling in the future. The brown-skinned folks I met and befriended (after they unconditionally befriended me) seemed to have long since forgiven any past sins committed against them by fair-skinned masters, and even continued to forgive fair-skinned dummies like me for my ignorance in the present. Which is why sometimes I wonder: Do they ever push fair-skinned guys like myself away, or is it usually the fair-skinned people and cultures that are pushing them away?

That's one of the riddles I hope to solve here. Stereotypes suck but sometimes I fall back on them out of a combination of laziness and a notion that, "Well, maybe the good old stereotypes are as good a starting point as any; hopefully we can proceed to the stereotypes' many exceptions from there.

But, I hope that sharing my experiences among the unsung brown-skinned heroes of Detroit will help us all depart a little from the chains of stereotyping.

Sincerely,
Kevin T.
__________________
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
Reply With Quote
  #112  
Old 11-23-2013, 10:31 AM
london london is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: UK - land of the free
Posts: 1,635
Default

There are cultural differences between groups of black people. In the UK, the vast majority of black people came here after WW2, so most black people born today would have grandparents or perhaps great grand parents who were born in Africa or the Caribbean. Saying that, many are first or second generation, either they or their parents were born in another country and came here relatively recently. Some of these people might be Muslim because the African country they are from has a large Muslim population, like Nigeria. This also affects their lifestyles.

In America, of course they also have people who have emigrated but they also have tonnes of black people who have been there (or their families have been) since slavery. Their culture is American. They aren't influenced by an African or Caribbean culture and are usually Christian.
Reply With Quote
  #113  
Old 11-23-2013, 08:29 PM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is online now
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,170
Default

I'm rolling my eyes over the temper tantrum of "black/white/brown etc". Seriously?
Words are labels-but they are most importantly labels to make communication possible. Which means that by their nature they are NOT exact. It's something we have to accept in order to have a damn conversation.
That said:
Quote:
Well first of all, what would you say the point is? Is it that we need to talk more about culture, and less about skin color? Is it additionally that all individuals are unique people and can't be expected to conform to some stereotype about their "race?"
The point of anything thread is defined by the original poster. Of course-anyone who wants to make an unrelated point, could start their own post.

Quote:
So again, it sounds to me like the point is that all people are unique and individual and not necessarily at all a product of their "stereotypical racial culture."
Or, they aren't a product of the culture that they may APPEAR to be.
My boyfriend APPEARS to be white and easily "slips under the radar" as BEING white. But the truth is that he IS Chinese/white mixed. His grandmother was OBVIOUSLY Chinese.
My oldest child is obviously not "white" like I am. But she is generally assumed white by most people. However, she is Puerto Rican and identifies VERY STRONGLY with that part of her heritage.
My youngest child is part Chinese and no one can tell.
My nearest and dearest are various shades of black. Furthermore-they all prefer "black". Not "brown" or "African American". They PREFER their race designation to be BLACK. Enough so that when some dingbat threw a tizzy fit over how "African American" was the more approrpiate term-they flipped their lids, lost their marbles and flew off the handle over how they ARE NOT FROM AFRICA.
One of them-had me smiling and I probably will continue to smile over this for some time, pointed out that his mother is into geneology. THEIR FAMILY WAS NOT FROM AFRICA for so many generations-she can't FIND proof that they EVER WERE. Meaning-it didn't happen anytime in the last 15+ generations! So the whole "African-American" is so ridiculous to their family, they KNOW their geneology. They weren't brought to America as slaves. They weren't brought to America. They traveled here as free men from Europe, where they were also free men. *and yes when I say men I also mean women.

Quote:
I guess we need to start talking about brown-skinned people that we know.
Already started that. But, really-I think posters need to understand that whatever YOUR PERSONAL PREFERRED TERM IS-that DOES NOT make it THE prefered term. There is no world-wide preferred term. So stop turning the board upside down in an effort to force other posters to use the term you like. If KDT says black and white-it is his right-unless the moderators tell him it is not.
IF another poster feels that there is some sort of abusive name calling or other rule breaking behavior in his posts they can PM A MODERTOR to handle it.
***** Moderator hat on****** Using the terms "black", "white", "colored", is not breaking any rule on this forum currently.

*****Mod hat off.******
Quote:
Unfortunately for me, I hardly know any (especially in the here and now). The few I ever got to know all lived in Detroit. And I never got to know them well enough to hear about what influenced their upbringing, aunts, grandmothers, etc.; I think their background was strictly American but it's possible some may have had some foreign influence in their background.
It is absolutely not necessary to be personally acquainted to any group in order to be an ally to them. Nor should anyone suggest it. It is important to respect the preferences of individuals within a group you want to help, if they speak up on a personal preference in how you deal with THEM. But it's not necessary to actually be personally acquainted to take a step towards introduction and inclusion to anyone.

****Moderator hat back on******
IN FACT-the purpose of this board is inclusion and acceptance to a collection of different minority groups. It would be to the benefit of ALL posters (and lurkers) if the people who are choosing to post remember, that their personal beliefs, ideas, preferences, opinions etc are NOT THE end all, be all. That this is a meeting place for multiple groups of people with SOMETHING in common, though not necessarily much in common. Treating each other with the ASSUMPTION that no harm is intended would go a long way to fostering better understanding.
*****Mod hat back off*****

Quote:
These folks weren't looking for any offensive thing I might say so they could pounce on it. They got that I was "fair-skinned and from the stereotypical Utah culture," and they tolerated and accepted that in me.
This is key for all people to be able to mix with others who don't share a commonality of any type.

Quote:
I just hope I can help brown-skinned (and any-color-skinned, from any culture) persons feel as welcome amongst "the majority race" (e.g. fair-skinned) as they made me feel.
You have made this clear in your posts, repeatedly. I find it frustrating and offensive that instead of moving from the stance of this good intention, anyone, would react by tearing apart your terminology. ESPECIALLY on a board that is multicultural and world-wide-therefore ensuring that there is no ABSOLUTE common accepted terminology.

Quote:
Do they ever push fair-skinned guys like myself away, or is it usually the fair-skinned people and cultures that are pushing them away?
It goes both ways. Some people push others away. Others "suck them in with love" so to speak. That happens in all races. But I think it's always good when anyone, of any race or culture can extend that loving kind of suck towards others of different cultures.

Quote:
"Well, maybe the good old stereotypes are as good a starting point as any; hopefully we can proceed to the stereotypes' many exceptions from there.
Stereotypes are often based in truth, but magnified into exaggerations. They aren't a terrible place to start if you lack knowledge. In fact-NO PLACE is a terrible place to start moving towards connection with others. Even if someone starts out as a total bigoted jerk-off, if they are moving towards connection and caring-wonderful. The starting place is what it is. It's the journey that matters.

Also-stereotyping isn't prejudice. ALL people stereotype. It's a necessity in life. i refuse to go into the lengthy explanation as to why-but anyone wanting to look into it can look up social psychology David G. Meyers and find information on precisely that topic.
Stereotyping CAN lead to prejudice and discrimination. Prejudice can lead to stereotyping.
But they are different and they don't always lead to one another.
__________________
"Love As Thou Wilt"
Reply With Quote
  #114  
Old 11-24-2013, 03:22 AM
ColorsWolf's Avatar
ColorsWolf ColorsWolf is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: CA, U.S.A.
Posts: 362
Default

Thank you, Kevin.~ I'm sorry I was a little sharp before.~ I'm glad you are now trying to think beyond "stereotypes", I hope to get more people to do this as well.~

Also I do not acknowledge the concept of "race" in the context of "skin-color", skin-color is only 1 of many characteristics of each individual person, but I do recognize "culture".~

There are no "good" stereotypes as the definition of a "stereotype" is an "overgeneralization".~

I honestly don't stereotype people when I meet them, whether they have black, brown, pink, or actual white skin, or they are male, female, or some thing else: I treat every one with exactly the same consideration, I do not know them, so I get to know them as a person, not as a fantasy other people have made up about them.~

So people are walking question marks to me until I get to actually know them, I don't see an Asian-looking individual and automatically think, "He must be poor, from an Asian country, and know Kung Fu.", I do think, "He has a very interesting look and I want to get to know him better."~

LovingRadiance, when you say that "ALL people stereotype." you either have truly never met or known any one who is not as you describe, or you are lying.~

By saying that, "ALL people stereotype." you are you yourself stereotyping EVERYONE.~

Quote:
Originally Posted by london View Post
There are cultural differences between groups of black people. In the UK, the vast majority of black people came here after WW2, so most black people born today would have grandparents or perhaps great grand parents who were born in Africa or the Caribbean. Saying that, many are first or second generation, either they or their parents were born in another country and came here relatively recently. Some of these people might be Muslim because the African country they are from has a large Muslim population, like Nigeria. This also affects their lifestyles.

In America, of course they also have people who have emigrated but they also have tonnes of black people who have been there (or their families have been) since slavery. Their culture is American. They aren't influenced by an African or Caribbean culture and are usually Christian.
Exactly, this is why the word "black" is an overgeneralization.~

When some one tells me that a group of people are "black": that tells me absolutely nothing about this group of people other that they literally have "black" skin.~

Sincerely,

ColorsWolf
__________________
Love yourself, you are beautiful!~ ^_^

*Believe in yourself, you can do anything*!~ ^_^

Appreciate every thing, every thing is precious.~


Last edited by ColorsWolf; 11-24-2013 at 05:01 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #115  
Old 11-24-2013, 04:25 AM
Dirtclustit Dirtclustit is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Middle of Oregon
Posts: 431
Default Since there is a possibility you are being sincere

Quote:
Originally Posted by kdt24617
As for culture per se: I wonder if African Americans are onto something when they hesitate to give "polyamory" a name (or acknowledge that it has a name). Perhaps they realize that nomenclature isn't the secret to saving the world. Actions speak so much louder than words -- I think. But caucasions like me almost have this built-in habit of fancying that "If we just coin the right magic word for things, people's attitudes will change about it." The word for "African American" has changed several times over the past century. Has that race benefitted in proportion to the number of changes? I have to wonder. Oh I suppose it's helped to some extent but, How much? is the question, and, Has it been worth it? Lots of stars-on stars-off Sneetch tactics, it almost seems to me.

Rather than word change/manipulation, I think black/white relations have been helped much more by demonstrations, civil discourse between the races, and things like Martin Luther King Jr.'s unforgettable "I have a dream" speech. I have similar opinions about non-human people's rights, as well as about polyamorist, LGBT, and BDSM rights. I know many will disagree with me. I hope my personal opinion isn't offensive. I regret talking about it in the presence of any who've worked damn hard to fix the English language so as to correct people's foul or ignorant attitudes. I don't mean to diss that work. But if we can't talk about our opinions, then we'll all be missing out on the benefit of choosing between (and gleaning new ideas from) multiple differing perspectives.

Ummm, just for the record: I'm no expert on racial issues, just an "armchair enthusiast." So please feel free to correct any of my false suppositions with any edifying data you have. (Personal perspectives are also welcome.)

I, guess there's no reason to "force things to change." They won't change for a long time anyway. Maybe it'll actually help if we focus on the half-full part of the glass and get encouragement from it.

Sorry if I seem over-zealous about the whole thing. I just miss the presence of African American (and Native American, Latino, Hispanic, etc.) culture when I attend my poly meetings. It's a sentimental problem and technically belongs only to me (though others may carry around their own version of culture-poly problem perception).
So I am willing to give you the benefit if doubt regardless of what it may only appear to say between the lines, I will point out the surface meaning that you may or may not be aware of, in case you missed it the first time, sentences such as this one

"I have similar opinions about non-human people's rights, as well as about polyamorist, LGBT, and BDSM rights."

you may wish to avoid as it is the way it is written can be misleading. It is *almost* as if it implies that poly, LGBT and BDSM people are non human, which may tend to hit a few nerves regardless of their race and regardless of your desired message. Something to think about if you are concerned about coming off as being sincere

but then again, I am no authority, nor grammarian, nor linguist so I don't think it means anything if continue to use sentences structured as that one, perhaps if it was the third time it might appear more deliberate, but luckily the author is here so I can just ask if you intentionally wrote the sentences knowing the second surface meaning was pretty much right there, uncovered, on the surface

This is just one person's opinion as far as I know, so you can take it or leave it, for what it's worth

but actions do speak louder than words, however derogatory words do, do a lot of harm, many times it's the subtle ones that are the most harmful, especially when they are hatefilled because they are unmistakable.

For instance, there was a term which was used to describe a person which you appear to want to call "blacks", which therm was coined from the country Nigeria. It was a term that was or had become closely bound with racism and hatred (often unspoken) to Human Beings, and the hatred was assigned due to the color of their skin.

Such a hatefilled term becoming socially unacceptable did effectively remove a bigot's ability to marginalize a human being anywhere he pleased. As when people speak out, they cannot get away with lesser know ways to intimidate another human being.

So yes specific words actually do have a much greater effect than I think you have admitted to.

In fact I subscribe to the theory that there would not need to be any discourse between races if people spoke out, each and every time they smell the hatred spilling all over everything with a putrid stench, and if we all did spoke up, with nothing more than a "hey! that's unacceptable, are you aware how that makes people feel?"

"Do you care?"

it's extremely effective at removing their power to marginalize and intimidate those whom would otherwise continue to violate and creep into every safe public place, and that feeling of safety is very important.

Especially with how far my govt has taken the safety as an excuse to violate, I be damned if I am going to let them take away the psychological sanctuary, nobody has the right to do that kevin

Last edited by Dirtclustit; 11-24-2013 at 04:43 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #116  
Old 11-24-2013, 07:05 AM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is online now
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,170
Default

Actually colorswlf-as a social psych student, I have studied the topic. We stereotype people and things as a way to classify. Every person and most animals do it.
And as I said, Im not explaining the science. But as an avid learner, you CAN go research it. The information is readily available. I gave the critical temrs and even a social psychologist authors name.
Feel free to read up on just how much EVERY PERSON does do it-in a multitude of ways and arenas in life. Its a basic survival mechanism.
__________________
"Love As Thou Wilt"
Reply With Quote
  #117  
Old 11-24-2013, 07:50 AM
ColorsWolf's Avatar
ColorsWolf ColorsWolf is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: CA, U.S.A.
Posts: 362
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingRadiance View Post
Actually colorswlf-as a social psych student, I have studied the topic. We stereotype people and things as a way to classify. Every person and most animals do it.
And as I said, Im not explaining the science. But as an avid learner, you CAN go research it. The information is readily available. I gave the critical temrs and even a social psychologist authors name.
Feel free to read up on just how much EVERY PERSON does do it-in a multitude of ways and arenas in life. Its a basic survival mechanism.
I've already said my piece on this subject, I will not argue this with you as no amount of studies is going to change how I see things.~

Yes, I can use visual or other ques to equal possible information about some one, but I never take this information as any thing more than a possibility until I actually inquire about it by actually getting to know them, then I can determine whether or not the possible information is true or not by asking the person in question.~

Every one has their own perspective, please remember that.~
__________________
Love yourself, you are beautiful!~ ^_^

*Believe in yourself, you can do anything*!~ ^_^

Appreciate every thing, every thing is precious.~

Reply With Quote
  #118  
Old 11-24-2013, 10:14 AM
london london is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: UK - land of the free
Posts: 1,635
Default

When an American says black people, I know they are more than likely referring to black people with American culture. In the UK, I might ask if they mean Africans or Caribbean but they'd usually say. We also refer to black British culture but will say as much.
Reply With Quote
  #119  
Old 11-24-2013, 09:43 PM
Dirtclustit Dirtclustit is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Middle of Oregon
Posts: 431
Default To be clear

It wasn't the words used to describe a people, and I understand the BDSM term for non-human, but it just happened to be the second time in not so many weeks a person with normally impeccable grammar wrote a sentence with two conflicting "surface meanings" and if the second meaning isn't about love or sex it tends to get on my nerves as if reminds me too much of how erudites, grammarians, BDSM and Poly and especially IT people use words in a completely different meaning, and even when poly and power exchange people do it in regards to sex of love sometimes it still riles me.

People with obscure knowledge, need to be especially careful that they don't abuse such knowledge, esp since there is a growing number of people who are beginning to realize that Caucasians are not white, even though they definitely took it upon themselves to believe they were, and so also took it upon themselves to become tyrannical leaders who commit atrocities which they *almost* actually believe their own lies as if what they did was right or could be ever be justified.

As far as the term white goes, Caucasians are in actuality one of the furthest people from it. As traditionally "white" meant clear, transparent or "see through"

which is the other reason this post riled me, as I don't particularly get along with the seemingly growing number of people who get senses mixed up, color would be a mix up of reflections detected by sight
Reply With Quote
  #120  
Old 11-25-2013, 08:57 AM
kdt26417's Avatar
kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
Official Greeter
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Olympia, Washington
Posts: 4,769
Default Part 1 of 3

@ london ... I like what you say, lots and lots of "black variety" springs up when looking at various parts of the world.

---

Warning: Buckle up, coz what you're about to read is gonna be a rough ride (and incite great wrath towards me as well).

Re (from LovingRadiance):
Quote:
"I'm rolling my eyes over the temper tantrum of 'black/white/brown etc.' ... Seriously?"
LOL ... so you're saying the world will not actually end because of these things? Shwhew; that's good; I was getting a little worried there.

Re:
Quote:
"Words are labels -- but they are most importantly labels to make communication possible. Which means that by their nature they are *not* exact. It's something we have to accept in order to have a damn conversation."
Amen.

Re:
Quote:
"The point of any thread is defined by the original poster."
Ah. With that opening, I'll re-iterate that my "official point" in initiating this particular thread was to see what I could learn about what I saw as a "troubling absence" of "apparent minority races" in the poly events I've attended -- and possibly a statistical near-absence of minority races on some poly forums as well. The last bit of that sentence quite possibly being a sheer figment of my imagination, but just in case, I thought I'd mention it.

And even more "to the point," my hope in initiating this particular thread was to brainstorm ideas on how to "get all us diverse poly races and cultures even more together than we were previously." No more, no less.

Re:
Quote:
"Of course -- anyone who wants to make an unrelated point, could start their own thread."
I actually don't mind "mini-hijacks" here and there, long as they don't become full-blown derails (and train wrecks).

Re:
Quote:
"My nearest and dearest are various shades of black. Furthermore -- they all prefer 'black.' Not 'brown' or 'African American.' They *prefer* their race designation to be *black.* Enough so that when some dingbat threw a tizzy fit over how 'African American' was the more approrpiate term -- they flipped their lids, lost their marbles and flew off the handle over how they *are not from Africa.*"
Huh? What? They're not?

LOLOL ... You seem to be observing that said "browns" ("Hello my brown brother! Don't you feel empowered by my reference to you as the shade of a stereotypical piece-o-shiz?") are as tired of the "what to call those inconvenient colored folks" debate as us ingnernt honkies are! LOLOL ... Jeezh, let's agree on a (preferably merciful short and sweet) term already and stick with it.

Damn. I'm a-gonna use "black/s" from now on.

It don't bother me to be called "white." Hell it don't even bother me to be called "honky" or "cracker." I can take a jab in the ribs about my skin color (and all the not-so-funny American history that goes with it). So I'm not "technically white." Big freakin' deal, I thought we weren't supposed to care about what the scientific definition of one's skin color was. (Sorry, I know I'm basking in irreverent levity here, but sometimes the otherworldly absurdness does disturb one's mind. Can I get an amen?)

Admittedly, I consider "the N word" to suck more than "the H or C words" because it's "the N word" people who got so horridly maltreated by "the H/C humans." (I guess the widespread usage of the N word when blacks are talking to each other is meant by them as a bit of grim irony.)

Re:
Quote:
"One of them -- had me smiling and I probably will continue to smile over this for some time -- pointed out that his mother is into geneology. *Their family was not from Africa* for so many generations -- she can't *find* proof that they *ever were.* Meaning -- it didn't happen anytime in the last 15+ generations! So the whole "African-American" thing is so ridiculous to their family, as they *know* their geneology. They weren't brought to America as slaves. They weren't brought to America. They traveled here as free men from Europe, where they were also free men. *And yes when I say men I also mean women. "
Hmmm ... interesting ... interesting ... the plot thickens ...

Re:
Quote:
"I think posters need to understand that whatever *your personal preferred term is* -- that *does not* make it *the* preferred term. There is no world-wide preferred term."
Oh crap. Now we'll never agree ...

Re:
Quote:
"If KDT says black and white -- it is his right -- unless the moderators tell him it is not."
Oh gods, don't "speak of the devil" [read: "speak of the moderators" -- but I don't mean you're a devil, O ruthlessly witty one] or the devil will come, and have my filthily-delusioned European American butt in a sling for saying black and white (There goes my myopic black-and-white thinking again).

Re:
Quote:
"It is absolutely not necessary to be personally acquainted to any group in order to be an ally to them."
Coolness! Happy happy.

Re:
Quote:
"Treating each other with the *assumption* that no harm is intended would go a long way to fostering better understanding."
Oh man ... that's exactly how we should treat each other, and explains exactly why we should treat each other that way.

Re:
Quote:
kdt26417 sed:
I just hope I can help brown-skinned (and any-color-skinned, from any culture) persons feel as welcome amongst "the majority race" (e.g. fair-skinned) as they made me feel.

... LovingRadiance replied:
"You have made this clear in your posts, repeatedly. I find it frustrating and offensive that instead of moving from the stance of this good intention, anyone would react by tearing apart your terminology. *Especially* on a board that is multicultural and world-wide -- therefore ensuring that there is no *absolute* common accepted terminology."
... and kdt26417 rhapsodizes:
Ohh man ... I sooo appreciate that vote of moral support. IMO, words are only barbs when they're *meant* to be barbs. Now meaning words as jabs in the ribs: that's something I'm often guilty of. But as barbs? Me? Gosh darn it, I ain't the type.

Re:
Quote:
"Some people push others away. Others 'suck them in with love' so to speak. That happens in all races. But I think it's always good when anyone, of any race or culture can extend that loving kind of suck towards others of different cultures."
Yes -- such is most propitious.

Re:
Quote:
"Stereotypes are often based in truth, but magnified into exaggerations. They aren't a terrible place to start if you lack knowledge. In fact -- *no place* is a terrible place to start moving towards connection with others. Even if someone starts out as a total bigoted jerk-off, if they are moving towards connection and caring -- wonderful. The starting place is what it is. It's the journey that matters."
See? Even Archie Bunker can be saved.

And I even agree with you about the distinction between prejudice and stereotyping. Thanks for your post in general.

[end of rough ride ... perhaps ...]

[continued below]
__________________
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 03:24 AM.