Originally Posted by SNeacail
it hurts to know he was only willing to pay attention when he was in danger of having an outsider think he was a selfish bastard.
My ex-husband continually refused to go to counseling, and, when we were separated, thanked me for not bitching about him to my friends. It's sad to see that there are people who care more about how they're perceived by others, rather than caring about the state of their relationships with those they love (or purport to love). The good thing is that your husband and TN's wife agreed to counseling in the first place, and opened themselves up to hearing what a third party thinks. It's a big step.
TN, I'm glad your wife finally heard you, regardless of the circumstances. I hope things start improving.