-- Sounds pretty much the same to me!
We were FWB for a year living apart, then a couple living apart, then a living together couple with a roomie (informally engaged), then living together as a couple without roomie (formally engaged), then living as married couple, then living as a married couple with a kid.
Really no matter how it is done or called, there IS a period of reflection and engagement before marriage. Just that people that I know in RL seem to skimp out and RUSH through it rather than giving it its due to use the reflection time to their own best benefit.
Feeling that engagement is a big serious thing? Well... it IS. A person ought to be congratulated on achieving this big step! How many times in life is one going to be Engaged in Contemplating Marriage? Not many.
Congrats to you, YoungPoly
, on your engagement. I was coming back to post that since I had forgotten to earlier. It is indeed a big deal, as marriage is a big deal. Kudos to you for taking it seriously, and for doing the hard work it requires - to really THINK out for yourself "Is this for me? Now? With this person?"
Your thoughts and feelings are appropriate for the place you are at. There is nothing wrong with you.
I commend you on your emotional maturity and your values. I love seeing people with hot ethics! Shine on!