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Old 09-25-2012, 09:06 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2010
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Hey, welcome!

There are a few of us Solo Poly peeps (and I just realized that all the ones that seem to discuss it here are women, IIRC), and I'm one of 'em.

Feel free to add to our thread, which I created, where we talk about what we want as solos practicing polyamory, here: Solo poly people - what's your ideal?

Quote:
Originally Posted by AggieSez View Post
Still, the dearth of men (I'm primarily straight) who seem interested in contacting me or dating me makes me wonder: What's the issue?

Is it that I'm in my mid 40s? That I'm not looking to jump on the "relationship escalator" -- but neither am I interested in purely casual hookups with little or no personal connection? Or that I'm not particularly kinky (although I'm very sex positive)?

Might my unpartnered status make me appear somehow suspect or threatening to poly people who are already coupled up?
Actually, you sound just like me, except I'm in my early 50s and definitely straight. I don't get contacted too much on OKC either, but it does happen - usually the guys I've met on there were contacted by me first. Not too many take the initiative (except for the duds). I seem to have better luck meeting guys in person, and talking about "non-exclusivity" rather than polyamory, which just seems more easily understood.
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/

Last edited by nycindie; 09-25-2012 at 09:17 PM.
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