Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 05-06-2011, 02:38 PM
Erosa's Avatar
Erosa Erosa is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Earth
Posts: 138
Default Novel Forumla For Poly?

Okay, some of you (if you have been here a loooooong time and remember me) know that I am a writer of sorts.

Right now, I am working on an idea for a sequence of poly-based romance books.

I am actaully looking to get these published, so I need a good, consistant basic formula for the romantic aspect. (Yes, forumla writing sucks most of the time.)

Could some of the more experienced poly-couples/lovers here help me with what your perspective on the usual progression of a poly relationship is?

I am interested in two progressions;

1. primary couple mutually courting a single person (male or female)

2. memeber of primary couple courting a secondary partner and/or secondary partner being courted by one primary partner.

My own experiences with poly have not been good examples so I would like some additional input!

Thanks!!
__________________
With all my heart I will love and not fail,
With all my soul I will fly and not fall.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 05-06-2011, 02:55 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 2,872
Default

Why not start where most romance novels start

Girl meets boy.. Upstanding good citizen
Girl meets other boy... More wild, free, sexually adventurous
Girl can't decide
Girl doesn't want to decide
Girl decides on both

Ensuing drama between boys
Girl convinces boys of love and uniqueness
All 3 live happily ever after

Most romance stuff doesn't work with married couples because I think, the idea of romance in marriage is lost and the concept of breaking out of marriage would be tough to break.

Starting with new love all around would be easier to sell I would think since at some time most of us have had to chose, wouldn't it be a romantic notion if we hadn't had to?
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 05-06-2011, 05:05 PM
Carma's Avatar
Carma Carma is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 478
Default

I'd say just read the personal blogs on here for some great ideas!!! No one uses their real names, anyway, so it's perfectly anonymous material to work with. Naturally you'd want to change the details, to further protect their identities, but I think there are some beautiful love stories going on here on this forum
__________________
Formerly married to Sundance
Boyfriend -- Butch Cassidy
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 05-07-2011, 03:32 AM
redpepper's Avatar
redpepper redpepper is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,634
Default

I personally don't think couple finds unicorn would be a good indication of most poly situations. Not that you said you were looking for that. I just don't think a romance of a couple seeking a third would be interesting. People who are independent would be to me. Maybe couple seeks unicorn, couple finds a possible unicorn, couple struggles, almost breaks up, unicorn almost leaves and then they figure out that all three can be independent and equal and live happily ever after raising an adopted girl from china.
__________________
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM
My blog
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 05-07-2011, 04:04 AM
Erosa's Avatar
Erosa Erosa is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Earth
Posts: 138
Default

Lol red pepper I like that!

Really I am looking for idealized situations. I do want realism, but only realism. This is fantasy, for the poly minded.

Having been a unicorn once myself, I know the extreme unlikelihood of a couple meeting an actual unicorn. Most women (or men) worth having are had. Lol by at least one person.

Thank you for all the good ideas. Keep em coming!

When i have a first draft, would anyone like to test drive it?

And am i right in assuming that the most common poly combos are:
1. Male-female-female (all linked)
And
2. Male who has two females, who are not linked to each other.

Also, can anyone give me an example of what the healthy sexual dimanic of a poly relationship is?

Sorry to be asking so many questions but if I do any representation of this community of people I want to do it accurately.
__________________
With all my heart I will love and not fail,
With all my soul I will fly and not fall.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 05-07-2011, 06:14 AM
redpepper's Avatar
redpepper redpepper is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,634
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Erosa View Post
Also, can anyone give me an example of what the healthy sexual dimanic of a poly relationship is?
did you mean dynamic?

I agree, read some blogs... There are a few of us in what we would consider healthy.
__________________
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM
My blog
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 05-08-2011, 01:56 AM
bkreader bkreader is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 9
Default

I think your best bet for a romance people would want to read is all single people that end up together. If you take an already devoted couple, it's going to take a very well written novel to convince mono readers that looking for a 3rd, 4th, etc. is a romantic thing to do. If you take 3(or more) people that are thrown together it's much easier to romanticize without having to explain why your main character is in a great relationship but wants more.

There are a lot of healthy dynamics that would just take far too much explaining to work in a book you want mono readers to enjoy. If you find something that really works for you and gets published, you can always have the same people in book 2 and introduce more people.

There are some books already out there that start with a mono situation and then gradually become more poly. I remember the Anita Blake books did that, although I found them unbearable to read once they became more porn than anything else.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 05-11-2011, 06:12 AM
scramcity scramcity is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 14
Default Couples and romance: how does that happen with a third?

[QUOTE=Ariakas;80246

Most romance stuff doesn't work with married couples because I think, the idea of romance in marriage is lost and the concept of breaking out of marriage would be tough to break.---//]

Ok. This is very interesting. Both you and red p mention this lack of romance. It helps me figure out that I am having some issues in this area with my couple that I care dearly for. (me being the elusive 'unicorn' and can i just say i am really starting to ahhh.... Dislike that term) And we have a great time out in the world and sex is great but I don't feel that dating feeling. I feel like we are all best friends who also sleep together. Would certainly welcome feedback on this situation that is new to me but apparently not to y'all!
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 05-11-2011, 12:29 PM
BlackUnicorn's Avatar
BlackUnicorn BlackUnicorn is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 906
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Erosa View Post
When i have a first draft, would anyone like to test drive it?

Would love to!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Erosa View Post
And am i right in assuming that the most common poly combos are:
1. Male-female-female (all linked)
And
2. Male who has two females, who are not linked to each other.

Hmm, I actually think there are quite a few prominent female posters in here who are hinges of a two-guy-vee. That's what the Anita Blake novels were originally about - 'I have two very different guys and I can't make my mind!' So if you are aiming for that chick lit feel, having a straight female lead, starting out as a single woman, then having this complicated dating situation with her two beaus, with temp break-ups and the works (Ariakas had it all down) would be totally marketable and also relatable to monos out there.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Erosa View Post
Also, can anyone give me an example of what the healthy sexual dimanic of a poly relationship is?
Depends a bit if you want to move them all under the same roof at some point, because it has a huge impact on the dynamics. You need a shitload of compersion to manage being the mono arm of a hinge and living together with your SO and their OSO.

Is it just me who is seeing this alpha male - more New Agey guy as the arms of the vee, accepting poly at different paces and eventually hitting it off after a few miles of bumby riding?

Quote:
Originally Posted by bkreader View Post
I remember the Anita Blake books did that, although I found them unbearable to read once they became more porn than anything else.
I know! Detective Anita Blake - cool; porn Anita Blake - disappointing .
__________________
Me: bi female in my twenties
Dating: Moonlightrunner
Metamour: Windflower
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 05-12-2011, 10:44 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 7,184
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Erosa View Post
And am i right in assuming that the most common poly combos are:
1. Male-female-female (all linked)
And
2. Male who has two females, who are not linked to each other.
[sigh]

I don't think you can really say what is common. Polyamory is practiced by a wide variety of people and in numerous configurations. The combinations you mentioned might appear to be more common on poly message boards and such, but...
__________________
The world opens up... when you do.

Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me. ~Bryan Ferry
"Love is that condition in which another person's happiness is essential to your own." ~Robert Heinlein
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 12:21 PM.