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  #151  
Old 09-26-2010, 04:17 PM
inlovewith2 inlovewith2 is offline
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That's something Lemondrop! I've been reading this thread with interest because DW and I are heavily considering coming out to our kids--they are 9, 7, and 4 and have met DW's girlfriend.

I'll post questions later but we are off to the track--I'm glad it went well for you Lemondrop and that you don't get flustered by the mistaken identities :-).
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  #152  
Old 09-26-2010, 05:57 PM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by inlovewith2 View Post
That's something Lemondrop! I've been reading this thread with interest because DW and I are heavily considering coming out to our kids--they are 9, 7, and 4 and have met DW's girlfriend.
Redpepper's son was five when we met so over the last two years he has kind of just grown into me in his family. He knows we all love each other so it's natural fo him now. I think the only way it would seem unnatural is if some one were to tell him that or he felt teased or judged.

Another friend of ours just came out o his teenage daughters. They simply told him "whatever, as long as it doesn't affect their lives".
He was disappointed that they didn't want to talk about it more or discuss alternate ways of having relationships. He is relieved to be out though and feels it was a positive move.
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  #153  
Old 09-26-2010, 06:42 PM
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TL4everu2 TL4everu2 is offline
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Our kids just met L's boyfriend last week. It was a positive experience. They both love him and think he's great for her. Our oldest (19 y/o daughter) said she liked the way he treated L. She also said that while he wasn't what SHE would have chosen, he WAS kinda hot. LOL
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  #154  
Old 10-08-2010, 03:54 PM
jcatx jcatx is offline
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So I am married and have a two year old. Live with my husband the boyfriend is a couple hours away..Any poly people here who have kids and how does this work out for you? I suppose when i initally found my husband friend attractive it was also considering the things that are missing from his life and in a way if he wanted, (and I very much wanted) him to know the joy of being with children. He has never been married and has no children. Or do you see this as being a potential problem? Since he is unaware of the demands of children?and has such a different lifestyle.
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  #155  
Old 10-09-2010, 04:28 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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GG had no children of his own.
He's beloved by all of ours.

The story can be found in my posts if you want to research it or you can use the link to my blog that is in my signature.

He's been "Nuncle GG" to my now 19 year old since she was almost 2.
He's been "uncle GG" to my 14 year old stepson since he was 2 (when I married his dad).
He's been "uncle GG" to my 10 year old son since he was born.
he's the bio-father of my 3 year old and she calls him "MY GG" (she calls my husband daddy-but all of the kids and the whole family know the whole story and she will-we tell her now-but she doesn't get it yet).

He's an AWESOME uncle, a beloved "3rd parent" and a wonderful part of our family.

It just depends on the person I suppose.
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  #156  
Old 10-10-2010, 01:23 AM
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Originally Posted by jcatx View Post
So I am married and have a two year old. Live with my husband the boyfriend is a couple hours away..Any poly people here who have kids and how does this work out for you? I suppose when i initally found my husband friend attractive it was also considering the things that are missing from his life and in a way if he wanted, (and I very much wanted) him to know the joy of being with children. He has never been married and has no children. Or do you see this as being a potential problem? Since he is unaware of the demands of children?and has such a different lifestyle.
http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...erged+unmerged

I had a thread once that went into some detail of what you are asking. Hope it helps and is interesting.
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  #157  
Old 12-21-2010, 12:51 AM
Athena Athena is offline
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From previous posts, obviously not CF! However, respect that other people may want to be focused on career achievement, travel, just plain not have to be financially responsible for anyone but their individual self! In some ways, even though I adore my son, even apart from the bipolar it was a bit like a bomb blast - suddenly my time was sooo not my own, and it was clear on going back to my job that that particular job was going to be impossible if I wanted to do what I felt was an adequate parenting job, and even so I know I will never have the time to just pick up a new topic professionally and read up on all the latest until kiddo is much older and more independent (and even so, given how tough it was to be an only child, I seriously think he would benefit from one or two sibs, although age, meds and fertility issues may make us parents of a singleton in the end...)
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  #158  
Old 12-21-2010, 12:18 PM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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i was an only child and i didn't think it was "tough" at all. Something to think about. Just because you thought it was "tough" doesn't mean it will be that way for your son.
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  #159  
Old 12-21-2010, 06:19 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NeonKaos View Post
i was an only child and i didn't think it was "tough" at all. Something to think about. Just because you thought it was "tough" doesn't mean it will be that way for your son.
Ditto, I was an only child and am a well adjusted adult. There is really a myth built around only children that I find annoying and judgemental, but thats a whole other rant.
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  #160  
Old 12-21-2010, 10:16 PM
Tonberry Tonberry is offline
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I have lots of only child friends who had a happy childhood, and I had siblings and really wish I hadn't. I think if you have children, you shouldn't do it to keep your first child company. What happens if they hate each other? Being blood related doesn't make you more likely to get along than any other people forced to live together for years: sometimes you're the best friends ever, sometimes you can't stand each other.
So I think that should be left out of the equation as it depends too much on the children's personalities, and that's impossible to guess.
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