Twenty Something - How do I find other twenty-somethings into or open to poly?

[ecoguy28]

Hi,

I am a Male, late-twenties, in a long-term relationship with a woman. We are trying to figure where we can possible meet people interested in a polyfidelitious relationship.

Almost everyone in the poly-scene in Toronto is older and coupled, and most we've found on dating sites are either too old for what we are comfortable with, already coupled or aren't serious about poly.

I've always been shy romantically and my partner is shy in general, both of which make the situation harder.

We live in a big city (Toronto). Any advice, suggestions or interest?

[redpepper]

Have you looked at the forum here for updates on poly groups in Toronto? Is there any other groups than the one you are in?

What is it that you are not interested in about the group/s you have found? Just that the people are coupled? Are they not looking for poly-fi then? Or is there something else?

Sorry for all the questions, I just am trying to get a grasp on what the issue is.

You could start your own group. Even if its just to meet for coffee at first. Put the word out there that you will be meeting at a certain time and place for a specific purpose and see where you get. This is where groups start. It's where I started in creating my community. It really works. I have made some great friend and meet loves that way.

[AutumnalTone]

Originally Posted by ecoguy28

Hi,

I am a Male, late-twenties, in a long-term relationship with a woman. We are trying to figure where we can possible meet people interested in a polyfidelitious relationship.

Find groups that accept and support non-mainstream activities and people. Pagans and Burners (Burning Man sub-culture), for example, support such and there are many polyfolk to be found among them. I know of lots of 20-something polyfolk among the Burners here.

I've always been shy romantically and my partner is shy in general, both of which make the situation harder.

Well, that's on you. If you won't take steps to find people you find interesting and see if they're poly or curious about poly, then you've no standing to complain about not finding polyfolk. You're going to have to step up and meet people and interact with them to find what you're looking for.

[magikman79]

we have found several on OkCupid, just watch out for people wanting to use you as an experiment to see if they would like the lifestyle.

[LadyLeanne]

I'm in a bit of a similar except I'm a single female in her early 20s with a few extra; 1) I'm new to poly, 2) I'm a Christian, 3) I live in Wales (and there are no meet-up groups anywhere near me - the closest is 4 1/2 hours out) and 4) I'm looking for 3 straight alpha males polyfidelitous relationship. I don't think it's going to be too hard to find the relationship type but considering the men I've met... I doubt my men are going to be in Britain. But then there's just another excuse to move to the States! =D

And as much as I'd love to meet my men today, I'm a firm believer that we'll meet when the time is right and we'll just go from there. =)

In the meantime though I'm going to be setting up a meet-up for poly folk about an hour from my home and study to become a kindergarten teacher & pastor and work my butt off with the Insanity workout! =D

[BlackUnicorn]

Originally Posted by ecoguy28

I've always been shy romantically and my partner is shy in general, both of which make the situation harder.

We live in a big city (Toronto). Any advice, suggestions or interest?

You can always try to have somebody scout for potential dates for you. It's not half as crazy as it sounds. Take somebody who knows you both (I assume you are looking for a triad?) and ask them to keep their eyes open. Several somebodies work even better.