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Old 09-06-2014, 11:21 PM
PragmaticFreeSpirit PragmaticFreeSpirit is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: NH, USA
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Default Hello from New Hampshire

Bi, poly, trans woman. Software/network/research geek by trade. INFP at heart. Dreamer, creator, lover of all that grows and changes and a well reasoned argument. From New Orleans originally, also lived in FL and NYC. Mother to a 3yo son.

I'm in the midst of divorce, was in a balanced triad with my ex and M about 10 years ago. M passed away suddenly a few months ago, to my deep regret and sorrow, most of all because we hadn't spoken in years, and I don't think he knew how much I still felt for him.

Polyamory, for me, is as much how I conceptualize relationships as the number of them. I don't experience the traditional categorical distinction between friends and lovers, but more of a continuum of intimacy. That plus long periods of monogamy had lead to me isolating myself in my marriage. Participating here is one way I'm trying to turn that isolation around.
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Old 09-07-2014, 03:22 AM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is online now
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Location: Olympia, Washington
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Greetings PragmaticFreeSpirit,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

Glad to have you onboard; sorry to hear about the divorce and M passing away. That's a lot of stuff to have to work through at one time.

It sounds a little like relationship anarchy might be a comfy fit for you. It blends well with polyamory, so that's good too.

I hope you'll enjoy your stay with us and find many interesting threads to read and post in.
Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter"

Notes:

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Welcome aboard!
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Old 09-07-2014, 04:09 AM
PragmaticFreeSpirit PragmaticFreeSpirit is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kdt26417 View Post
It sounds a little like relationship anarchy might be a comfy fit for you. It blends well with polyamory, so that's good too.
Interesting! Thank you for that connection! I can't honestly say I really know where exactly I fit yet, and I certainly don't want to misappropriate poly and it's community.

Certainly I'm looking at my relationships a lot differently than I did last I was in the poly community. At that time, some of the intimate network/non hierarchical poly people (who seemed strange to me at the time) seemed closer to what is now known as RA, so I had figured I probably fit with them now.

I am starting to understand the independence of those two concepts though, and it's helping clarify a large muddy space in my mental map. Thanks again for introducing me to these shiny new ideas. *bounce* :-)
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Old 09-07-2014, 03:04 PM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is online now
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Old 09-07-2014, 09:16 PM
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AlanAnna AlanAnna is offline
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Location: Costa Mesa CA
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Welcome welcome!

We're planning an eventual move to western Mass and it's good to hear about mindful poly people like you in the neighborhood.

There are a couple of warmhearted poly groups in New England and it sounds like you'd hit it off with the members of those.

Again: welcome! Lovely to make your acquaintance.

Alan & Anna
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