My life so far and how I got here

So how to start this. How me and hubby got together perhaps...

I first met my husband when I was 18 at a college friends house party (in the UK we start college at 16/17). At the time I had a boyfriend who was my first I was with him since I was 15. Tom (hubby) was sleeping with all the girls he was a well known player and I think just about all the girls knew of him. It wasn't that he was overly sexy looking, it was that he had his own business as an Electrician he had 6 men in his employment he was only 28 so he had lots of money he had a car and house and he used to buy a bunch of the drinks and things, and the girls would gossip between each other how good he was in bed. He has always been a charmer though, he knows exactly how to talk to people and get out of any problem.

One of the things I loved at the time at one of the house parties. There was about 5 of us girls there, I was the only one with a boyfriend, one girl was a virgin and the other three were single - among I forgot how many men, maybe 15. The guys were giving a little grief to the girl who was a virgin because she's a virgin and that she's waiting to get married before she gives it away.

Sometime later in the evening there was a lot of laughing going on like a commotion so I rushed into the hallway where the bathroom door is, and there she was and Tom were having sex with her on top of him, she didn't get off of him she just continued, obviously drunk. I found him to be really sexy at that point lol. One of the guys went in had a closer look they were not using a condom and she really was a virgin.

Then sometime later the three girls who were single were calling her a slut and everything, they stopped being friends with her. I didn't understand why they were being like it with her because I knew each one of them had already been with loads of guys. But yeah, at the time I found it really hot seeing him doing that.

To be continued...

Then after a while he somehow got my number. It was obvious he was chasing me, I expected he was only after one thing and then he'd ignore me.
But he was really going to town on me! he was being a friend, he was my taxi when he wasn't working, then my mum said he seems very keen to be with me all the time - as he used to pick me up from my parents house. I was starting to fall for him but I also loved my boyfriend more than anything he was my first after all, I was like a bag of emotions.

Then a few days before valentines day he mailed this gift box to me, my mum took the delivery. Took it to my bedroom, inside was a little black dress, lingerie set bra thong and stay up stockings, and these really nice high heels I really liked. On valentines day my boyfriend too to a nice restaurant it was lovely, but later we had sex I just wasn't feeling it with him. The next day I had to tell him its over.

I was really upset for a couple of weeks. Then I contacted Tom, I just wanted to relax I asked him lets just go cinema or something. He drove me back home, in his car we were kissing and doing intimate things new couples do. He asked if I was on BC I said no. He said its fine he will pull out, I told him no he has to use a condom, he has been with loads of girls I don't want to catch anything. So then we agreed to arrange to go get tested.

The results came back clean. So I told him I'll wear those clothes he got for me if he books an hotel room, what he got for me was a bit slutty for my taste but I didn't seem to care. I wasn't on BC so I pre-planned it so I went and got the morning after pill ready for the morning after. You should have seen my dads face when I was ready to leave that evening, lol I had to tell them I'm going out with some girl friends. I told Tom to park around the corner before picking me up so my parents don't see him and to text me when he arrives as I don't want them seeing how much older he is than me, 18 to 29. So what does he do? He knocks on the door, smartly dressed in a suit tuxedo he looked like James Bond or something lol! My mum was like, I could see it in her eyes "he's a keeper!" and I'm there thinking if only you knew how much of a man slut he has been you would never let him near me, ha!

I was expecting to go straight to the hotel, instead he took me to this nice restaurant. I was thinking - he is not at all what I was expecting lol???
And then later we went back to the hotel. Wow, and I mean wow. He was amazing. Not only did we have sex on our first date but we actually made love, the sex was so lovely and amazing he was incredible. I just fell in love there and then.

Three years later we got engaged. Two years after that we were married which was an amazing time for us. Given his background before we got together - he has not cheated on me ever, I can tell he adores and truly loves me. My mum, and even two of my girl friends who know what he was like before, have said how we look at each other at times that its real love between us.

Then our two babies were born, boys now 7 and 4. He also has two sons from his previous relationship who are now 21 and 18. He was cheating on her and she found out, this was way before I met him.

Maybe two years ago I started working with Emily. We became friends talking about anything and everything we got on really well. She could easily be a glamour model she's beautiful, a gym goer with toned legs and bum, I'm straight and even I find her attractive. Which got me wondering if Tom might cheat on me with her? Me and Emily have talked a lot about sex, she explained what some men were like while I've told her what my ex and Tom is like. I wondered how he would measure up among some of those guys she was boasting about.

I've always loved the idea of seeing him with another woman but have never been able to do it for lots of reasons. Well, I was showing her some of our recent family photos on facebook to which she said how nice Tom looked and how our babies are super cute and how they look so much like him. Obviously attracted to him. I thought there and then I wouldn't mind seeing him have sex with her, but I could never figure out how to introduce them given the circumstances.

Then Tom wanted a barbecue while the summer was still around. So I invited her round among other friends and family.

At the party it was obvious they were attracted to each other. I wondered if he might cheat on me with her, so rather than wait for that, when we were in bed together I asked him about her does he like her, he said no and then I was thinking - huh??? she's stunning and a lovely girl. So I said it: "I think she's hot".
Then a day or two later he was asking about her, and so we came out had a long chat talking about polyamory kind of relations. I explained to him for the first time I loved it when I saw him with that virgin girl and how I'd love to see him do similar again. He was amused yet weirded-out but also loved the idea after a little more talking about everything.

I told him I have no desire for wanting to see other men, he is my one and only. Further explaining I do not want to lose him to another woman like my ex lost me to him. I explained to him I do not mind if he wants to have sex with her as long as he comes back to my bed and I#ll forever be his no.1. He loved that little speech, blatant obvious he admired and loved me more so for it.

Trying to cut a long story shorter...
they were then seeing each other usually most Fridays or Saturdays nights 1-2 nights a week, usually he'd stay the night at her apartment. I've never seen them "in action" but just knowing she has had him inside her has been such such a huge turn on for me.
And yet I've never exactly felt jealous of her. To a "normal"? persons perspective way of thinking how weird this must sound! For me I know (more like I hope) he will never leave me for her, and to be honest its a little bit of an excitement for me.

He spilled the beans the other night that she feels very tight, with no reference of me. I've gave birth to two of his children, she hasn't gave birth yet and she works out at the gym on a regular basis so obviously she's going to have a tight vagina.

Anyway! Like I've explained on other areas of this forum, she's now five months pregnant by him, I never ever expected that one. Personally I strongly believe she purposely got pregnant by him. No way of proving it though!

So, I searched online and found this forum for advice from anyone with similar experience of any kind. I found this forum. I feel all alone with my sexual turn on's, no friends or family understand the Poly style of the lifestyle.

I wish "open relationships" were classed as normal, just like these days how gay people getting that support.

Emily has already told her mum today, who demanded a phone call with me.
I have never felt so weird in my whole life trying to explain various things - using some things I read on this forum.

I am so not looking forward to approaching my parents and even Toms side about this,

So Emily's dad doesn't know yet, her mum said Emily will have to tell him, as the 18 year difference between them is too much to justify without even mentioning our relationship. To be fair, after a while, her mum wasn't too bad I was able to cool her off somewhat.

Emily stayed over last night for the first time at our house.
We had a good chat about everything before we settled down to watch a movie after putting the kids to bed, the eldest stayed up a little longer on his xbox. After the movie had finished Emily was feeling tired and asked if Tom wants to go with her which he did.

A while later I decided to go to bed, as I walked past her bedroom door I just about heard them having sex, before I went into to my 7y/o's bedroom to tell him its time to turn his xbox off and to get some sleep. So I went back to Emily's door and I stood there just listening to them going at it, it was somehow exciting hearing them together like that. After they had stopped when I heard nothing more I then went to bed.

The next morning, I was the first one up. The boys were asleep, as I approached Emily's room I heard them sleeping so off I went to make myself some breakfast. A while later I heard someone was up, it was my 7y/o he came downstairs as I went up to get the laundry. As I walked past Emily's room I was surprised to hear them going at it again.

So I was in the kitchen doing the laundry and washing up. Tom comes walking in with his bathrobe on, he purposely shuts the door to give me a hug and said Emily is in the shower and they've just had sex and he didn't cum that he wants to spread the love - as we had already spoken about this it would turn me on if he could fuck me as soon as he has been with her.

So we're standing there with him behind me him playing with my clit as we kissed. Then he enters me and OMG I had never felt so wet in my entire life! He slid right in me from behind I must have orgasmed within only a couple of minutes I kid you not. And then it was his turn so he was doing this thing he does with grinding it in deep and thrusting hard, I could sense he was very close, and then just as he was about to cum -- we heard the kitchen door handle turn -- OMG QUICKLY he pulled out I quickly pulled my thong back up straightened my dress and hair just as our 4y/o comes walking through the door asking for his breakfast.

LOL how we smiled at each other as Tom walked out I could see in the corner of his eye how annoyed he was not being able to finish.

Fun times so far so good.

Hi Lou.

I don't know if this is a private blog or open for public comments. Please click the top tight red flag to ask the moderators to remove this if you want to keep the thread with just your posts.

Just wanted to say I love your writing style and humour. You and hubby are so clearly suited to the poly lifestyle. Well, I don't actually know if Tom will be able to handle jealousy the way you do if you were to find another man in the future.

How do you handle jealousy? I mean... you seem to be totally different when it comes to this emotion, even compared to other poly folk. I feel compersion strongly myself but would describe my compersion as more of a falling in love thing. Yours seems more of a sexual thing. I'm really curious.