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  #331  
Old 06-21-2012, 01:59 AM
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LotusesandRoses LotusesandRoses is offline
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Vanilla, I'm sorry.

If it makes you feel better, the most common situation that occurs is people in these situations usually just need a little time to think and come home just fine. Prayers for you and your beloved.
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  #332  
Old 06-21-2012, 02:26 PM
Vanilla Vanilla is offline
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Thanks everyone for your support. Nothing new yet, she's still missing.

LotusesandRoses, you are probably right. I just can't understand how she can do this to me, leaving without a word when she knows I'm gonna panic and get worried and go crazy. Things were getting better and now this, without any explanation. I've tried to call her mother and her best friend, they don't answer me. Her other friends don't know about her and everyone's just worried. I've tried to call her, send messages, fb, email, everything.
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  #333  
Old 06-21-2012, 02:45 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vanilla View Post
I just can't understand how she can do this to me...
I am sure she's not doing it TO YOU. It's not necessarily about YOU. Maybe she needs to get away FOR HERSELF. Maybe there is a reason her family is not answering your calls -- maybe she wants some alone time and distance. She has been struggling, I know, so this was probably the only way she saw to handle whatever she's going through. I'm sure she will be in touch when she's ready and feels strong enough.
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The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia "

An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/

Last edited by nycindie; 06-21-2012 at 02:49 PM.
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  #334  
Old 06-21-2012, 04:07 PM
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LotusesandRoses LotusesandRoses is offline
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If the best friend and mother aren't answering, that's a good sign! It means she's probably okay.

If you haven't already, I'd call the police. Her behavior is unacceptable if she is okay, and if she isn't, authorities should be notified.
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  #335  
Old 06-23-2012, 01:49 AM
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A bit late to edit, but if the mother isn't answering, she's likely safe. I would not call the police at this point. (Mods, you certainly can edit the above post.)
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  #336  
Old 06-23-2012, 09:50 AM
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BlackUnicorn BlackUnicorn is offline
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Default I'm alive

My spirit's on fire, aa-aa, uu, I'm alive... ahem.

And I've moved out, as you can see. There is nothing wrong with me, and I've let Vanille know that. She wants to marry someone else, and to me, that is the end of our engagement.
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  #337  
Old 06-23-2012, 12:37 PM
Vanilla Vanilla is offline
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This is just bullshit and you know it. You know I love you more than anything. More than my own life. And I wouldn't do anything against your will. So would you now please stop acting like an angry 7-years old and come home to talk about this? Or even answer my calls. You didn't let me know anything and I've worried my head off. I've never been this angry in my whole life, and no-one's ever treated me shitty like this, but please come home and we can figure this out. Please.
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  #338  
Old 06-23-2012, 04:02 PM
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You are not treating me in a loving way. And haven't for a while. Every month or two, somebody new walzes in to the picture, and you throw our lives completely upside down to accommondate the newest guy you just can't live without.

As to your new fiance, I told you that if you bedded him, I am not going to clean up the mess after things turn sour. This is me not cleaning up. Instead, I'm cleaning myself out. You can consider yourself a free single lady from now on.

And this is all I'm going to say on the matter here in public anymore.
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  #339  
Old 06-23-2012, 04:42 PM
Vanilla Vanilla is offline
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Why couldn't you just tell me what's bothering you and we'll figure it out, instead of leaving like this? You let me think that everything's just fine and getting better, and then just disappear? I don't want to do this publicly either, but this seems to be the only way you answer me. So please come home and we'll speak about everything. I've always loved you more than anything. And I always will. We can get things better, I promise. Be mono or whatever. I've promised to spend the rest of my life with you and I mean it, whatever happens. Just don't give up now. Or at least don't leave like this. I just want to see you so we can talk about this.

Call me. Please. I don't want to continue the conversation here.
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  #340  
Old 06-25-2012, 12:11 AM
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Thank you for letting us know you're alive and well BU. Hope you and Vanilla can come to some sort of understanding and peace soon.
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