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  #31  
Old 04-22-2014, 09:34 PM
Keepinghidden Keepinghidden is offline
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Making snap judgements about people is getting it wrong. On multiple times I have seen you attemp to police other peoples relationships by YOUR standards not theirs, by YOUR relationship dynamics not theirs and based on YOUR experiences not theirs.

Treat people as people even if you *meet* them online, rather than just attempting to attack their behaviour. My girlfriend has jealousy issues - yes - but I specifically said I was not looking for people telling me to leave her or attack her behaviour. I wanted to understand it, I want to help her and make our relationship stronger.

Galagirl DID help. She helped me understand jealousy by explaining the link between jealousy and fear. This also put it in a huge amount of context for me with respect to her anxiety and she also provided some references to further reading.

Mark this down as one of those times when you have messed up, accept that I have seen you do it before, try to think about how it has angered me and hurt my girlfriend (and others) in the past... Basically just learn from it. Adjust your behaviour and cut out the snap reactions.

Most importantly understand that everyone is here to share and learn more about themselves. This has the potential to be a fantastic resource for the community but if you ATTACK people for their behaviours when all they are doing is trying to learn from their behaviours then you do nobody any favours.

Because of your troll like actions specifically my girlfriend actually stopped using this site. Just think about that before you start typing
  #32  
Old 04-23-2014, 01:15 AM
london london is offline
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No, I'm sorry. This most certainly is not one of the times I've messed up. What I said about you enabling your girlfriend's unreasonable behaviour is absolutely true and I stand by it completely. Just because you don't like how I label her behaviour, the behaviour that you outlined, it does not give you the right to reframe what I've said as an attack. The only snap judgement I made was believing that there you were interested in her best interests. But now it's very obvious your intention is to maintain your own.
  #33  
Old 04-23-2014, 01:31 AM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keepinghidden View Post
In a site overly infested with trolls it's nice to know there are still some nice people.
There actually aren't many trolls here at all. They show up but they never last long. What there is a lot of is people with strong opinions. Sometimes opinions clash and discussions get heated. But that doesn't make the person with the unpopular opinion or tactless delivery a "troll." It's your own fault if you can't control your emotions well enough that you allow them to get under your skin.

Just because london pisses you off doesn't make her a troll. She's been here way too long with way too much resolution for a troll. She interacts with the world in a way that a lot of people find abrasive. She argues in a style that many people find stubborn and frustrating. But she's honest about who she is and what she believes, and she doesn't try to manipulate people with guilt trips or resort to name calling. I don't always agree with her. Actually, I rarely do. But I respect her for standing up for her opinions and not backing down just because they're unpopular.
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Gralson: my husband (works out of town).
Auto: my girlfriend (lives with her husband Zoffee).

The most dangerous phrase in the English language is "we've always done it this way."

Last edited by SchrodingersCat; 04-23-2014 at 01:45 AM.
  #34  
Old 04-23-2014, 01:39 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keepinghidden View Post
Now I would LIKE for this thread to be removed in it's entirety by a mod. However since that clearly isn't happening
No, it's not. Read the forum guidelines next time. Talk to those involved and get their permission before airing their dirty laundry on the internet.

Quote:
Originally Posted by http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1787
On Editing Posts

Users have a 12-hour window for editing posts. Once that 12-hour time limit has passed, a user will not be able to correct or delete a post. Please carefully consider what gets posted, as it may become a permanent addition to the site's content.
__________________
Gralson: my husband (works out of town).
Auto: my girlfriend (lives with her husband Zoffee).

The most dangerous phrase in the English language is "we've always done it this way."
  #35  
Old 04-23-2014, 02:34 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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We don't delete threads. We give people a very generous 12-hour window to edit or delete their own posts. After that, threads can be locked but usually only if they escalate into hostile arguments or violate guidelines in some way.

Personally, OP, I wouldn't worry about the info you posted. You used aliases to stay anonymous so no one will know who the thread is about. After a while, people will lose interest and stop posting. However, the name-calling and atttacking others whose opinions you dislike must stop.
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The world opens up... when you do.

Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me. ~Bryan Ferry
"Love is that condition in which another person's happiness is essential to your own." ~Robert Heinlein

Last edited by nycindie; 04-23-2014 at 02:51 AM.
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