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  #31  
Old 03-24-2014, 07:31 AM
Ryan3232 Ryan3232 is offline
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Inyourendo

Thank you for sharing that. I wish you, Sam, and your husband the best. It sounds like you have a very fulfilling and happy love life, true?

SchrodingersCat

(1) Construction (2) "all-included" (3) social profiling (4) communal yards & playgrounds...

Hm... It sounds like you have thought about this before?! Lol. I those are great starting points to starting from scratch. I am trying to think of any ideas that I would add to yours, but nothing comes to mind at the moment. So, I guess the next challenge is logistically making this happen. It is possible, it just will take some time, effort, and resources. I have a few friends who are interested in such a project, so I have started to throw around some ideas with them. We will see.

If you are curious or more interested, I would recommend seeking out the creators of www.beyondtwo.com; going based off of their profile questions about the idea of co-habitiation, it makes me think someone else was also thinking about the same thing.

Appreciate the input, thanks.
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  #32  
Old 03-24-2014, 11:40 AM
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Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
And it's funny, because people in America are basically returning to that paradigm. It's like we're finally figuring out that each person owning their own house isn't really sustainable or economically feasible, something that people in the rest of the world have known for centuries if not millenia. But people here make such a big deal out of 25 year olds still living at home, like it's this big awful thing. And to be fair, when that 25 year old is still unemployed, letting their mom do all the cooking and cleaning, then sure, "grow up" is in order. But with the rising cost of tuition, housing, and basically life, along with the relative decrease in wages and scarcity of good paying jobs, it's not hard to see why so many people are doing it out of necessity.
Gods yes. My girlfriend is a teacher and her and her husband have struggled to "make it on their own" and it's been tough. We've been looking at buying a duplex or a giant fixer-upper to convert into a big family home.

It's kind of pathetic though; in America it's shameful to rely on your family beyond a certain age. You know what I think? I think that America would be a better place if everyone was taught to rely on and support their family more.

Again, it's not that poly folks are the only people changing the paradigms, but in a lot of ways I think we are blazing new trails in terms of family life.
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  #33  
Old 03-24-2014, 02:39 PM
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Inyourendo Inyourendo is offline
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Originally Posted by Ryan3232 View Post
Inyourendo

Thank you for sharing that. I wish you, Sam, and your husband the best. It sounds like you have a very fulfilling and happy love life, true?

SchrodingersCat

(1) Construction (2) "all-included" (3) social profiling (4) communal yards & playgrounds...

Hm... It sounds like you have thought about this before?! Lol. I those are great starting points to starting from scratch. I am trying to think of any ideas that I would add to yours, but nothing comes to mind at the moment. So, I guess the next challenge is logistically making this happen. It is possible, it just will take some time, effort, and resources. I have a few friends who are interested in such a project, so I have started to throw around some ideas with them. We will see.

If you are curious or more interested, I would recommend seeking out the creators of www.beyondtwo.com; going based off of their profile questions about the idea of co-habitiation, it makes me think someone else was also thinking about the same thing.

Appreciate the input, thanks.
Yes it's absolutely wonderful. A lot o f communicating though. I wish everything was effortless but ive discovered being a hinge to 2 amazing men ia hard work. Its especially difficult for nate because he's feeling left out and sometimes mourns the new relationship energy we use to have. I try valiantly to recreate that for him.
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  #34  
Old 03-24-2014, 04:21 PM
Ryan3232 Ryan3232 is offline
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Originally Posted by Inyourendo View Post
Yes it's absolutely wonderful. A lot o f communicating though. I wish everything was effortless but ive discovered being a hinge to 2 amazing men ia hard work. Its especially difficult for nate because he's feeling left out and sometimes mourns the new relationship energy we use to have. I try valiantly to recreate that for him.
Have your valiant efforts been successful?

I am about to embark in a polyandry relationship with a female I am falling deeply in love with, so I ask because I am sure I will face some of the same difficulties at some point.

Ryan
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  #35  
Old 03-24-2014, 04:41 PM
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Yes. I think my efforts have been successful. Im just not used to needing to make an effort.
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  #36  
Old 03-24-2014, 04:55 PM
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As the hinge in a polyandry relationship. My advice is drop you expectations of fairness. At any given moment one relationship is going to need more attention. The arms of the vee have to be comfortable with their own skin. If you are the type who likes to be attached to your partner at the hip and are mono you are going to have a hard time.

Luckily both my husbands are comfortable with being left to their own devices on occasion.
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  #37  
Old 03-24-2014, 05:07 PM
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SchrodingersCat

(1) Construction (2) "all-included" (3) social profiling (4) communal yards & playgrounds...

Hm... It sounds like you have thought about this before?! Lol.
Not really, no... There was a thread a while ago about building houses for poly families, and some of those themes came up, but mostly I'm just good at bullshitting on the spot...
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  #38  
Old 03-24-2014, 05:38 PM
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Inyourendo Inyourendo is offline
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Originally Posted by Dagferi View Post
As the hinge in a polyandry relationship. My advice is drop you expectations of fairness. At any given moment one relationship is going to need more attention. The arms of the vee have to be comfortable with their own skin. If you are the type who likes to be attached to your partner at the hip and are mono you are going to have a hard time.

Luckily both my husbands are comfortable with being left to their own devices on occasion.
Thank you, great advice
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  #39  
Old 03-24-2014, 08:28 PM
opalescent opalescent is offline
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I personally am a fan of co-housing. I hope to end up in a cohousing community someday and I think it can offer solutions to lots of people, including poly folks. Cohousing offers communities where there is shared community space, like a large commercial kitchen, child care areas, library, workshops and so but each family or individual owns their own space, including bedrooms, baths and a kitchen. In the US, the property model is often either a condo or coop legal set up. I like it because there is private space, which I need greatly, and community orientated space as well. Co-housing is a form of intentional communities too.
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  #40  
Old 03-25-2014, 06:25 AM
Ryan3232 Ryan3232 is offline
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Inyourendto

I see, I imagine that can be difficult on Nate. May I please ask how you valiantly try to recreate that new relationship energy?

Dagferi

I appreciate the advice, will certainly keep it in mind. Considering I am human and not perfect, I am sure I will be challenged at times by the dynamics of a polyandry relationship. But, keeping your advice in mind and the fact that I am willing to make the sacrifices necessary for Her happiness, I hope that help the relationship be free and unhindered in its development.

SchrodingersCat

Bravo. Do you happen to know where I might start to find that thread you spoke of?

opalescent

In regards to your hoping of ending up in such a community, have you put forth any effort in finding a community that meets your needs?
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