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  #71  
Old 05-16-2014, 09:04 PM
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Well, we're almost all looking for love ... depending on how you define what "love" is of course.
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  #72  
Old 10-16-2015, 02:53 PM
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I wish I could of seen MeeraReeds thread http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=22633 several years ago, It would of made my life easier.

For a recap, my wife and I always had a platonic relationship and we had occasional sex. Eventually, we both wanted a family, so we married by default. 5 years ago, after 17 plus years, I wanted more and expected my wife to want to convert a platonic marriage into a romantic one. That was stupid. After several years of reading books on how to improve romance in marriages, we opened the marriage. She agreed that I could have other romantic relationships. She has no desire for sex with me or anybody else.


The problem is, being a man, how to tell women of interest what I was looking for when I didn't know myself. We were on the brink of divorce.

Even though our marriage was basically sexless, it was loving in many ways. My wife loves me more than she has ever loved anybody. I have always loved her as well. We are just not "in love". We probably never were. I wish that could be enough. That doesn't mean we have to divorce.

Defining the dynamics of my marriage and the type of relationship I was looking for was a disaster. I made so many blunders. In some of my friendships, I think it was being borderline creepy. IDK. Some female friends drifted away. I failed to find a sexual partner. So I haven't even attempted in over a year.

A lady friend that I haven't seen in several years text me the other day. She is one of the few women who I told about my sexless marriage she just drifted away back then as well. She just texted me and said, " what's up stranger, haven't heard from you in a while". She inquired about my marriage.

So I kept it simple. I replied, "my wife and I still have a loving platonic marriage". She said, "that sounds awful ". I replied, "no its great! I go out with friends, I have my hobby's, and still see my daughter every single day. I have my wife for companionship. I think I have the best of both worlds".

So we are meeting for drinks this afternoon. I still don't know how to define what it is I am looking for. I don't know what I want with her. I'll just see what developes this afternoon.

Last edited by Smiles; 10-16-2015 at 02:59 PM.
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  #73  
Old 10-16-2015, 08:59 PM
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Good luck with your meeting for drinks today, Smiles. It is good to hear from you, it's been awhile.
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