Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions


Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-06-2014, 09:39 PM
jayt jayt is offline
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Central Oklahoma
Posts: 44

Extraverted (E) 68% Introverted (I) 32%
Sensing (S) 73% Intuitive (N) 27%
Thinking (T) 50% Feeling (F) 50%
Judging (J) 55% Perceiving (P) 45%

on the K isa test... I always test extrovert
Reply With Quote
Old 05-07-2014, 08:15 AM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is online now
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,215

The MBTI is quite a bit more complex than just "you're these 4 attributes."

http://www.timeenoughforlove.org/Notation.htm explains it well.

It doesn't stop at "I means you're an introvert, N means you intuit more than sense, F means you feel more than think, J means you judge more than you perceive."

There's a whole inter-relatedness to them. They basically rank how much you exhibit the 4 traits (S,N,T,F).

The J/P aren't actually personality traits. They determine which of your two dominant functions is extroverted, with the other being introverted. The "J" functions are "T/F" and the "P" functions are "S/N". The E/I determines both whether you're an extrovert or introvert, and whether your extroverted or introverted trait is most dominant. The two traits not appearing in your 4-letter-code are also ranked according to your I/E, but as 3rd and 4th rank.

So taking INTJ as an example. The Judging function, Thinking, is extroverted, and the Perceiving function, Intuition, is introverted. Introversion dominates, so Intuition is the dominant function. Next-dominant function is Thinking, which is expressed extrovertedly. Next is Sensing (introverted) then Feeling (extroverted).
I don't need labels to define me. They're sticky and I hate the glue they leave behind.

Last edited by SchrodingersCat; 05-07-2014 at 08:18 AM.
Reply With Quote
Old 05-07-2014, 08:16 AM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is online now
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,215

I found it really challenging to retake the personality test right now, because I'm hot off the heels of a weeklong NVC workshop, where all we did was talk about feelings and needs for 6 hours a day, and emphasize how much judgements and thoughts get in the way of connecting to people...

I used to be IN(F/T)J, but I think I've really changed a lot in the 3 years since I took it. I've been working a lot on trying to become the kind of person I'd like to be, to focus more on harmonious relationships with the people in my life, to have more compassion for people. Living in the moment and letting the past be the past, the future be unknown.

So my results...

You have moderate preference of Introversion over Extraversion (56%)
You have moderate preference of Intuition over Sensing (25%)
You have moderate preference of Feeling over Thinking (50%)
You have slight preference of Perceiving over Judging (17%)

Introverted (I) 64%
Sensing (S) 50%
Feeling (F) 70%
Perceiving (P) 73%

So... INFP? (I checked ISFP just to see. There were some bits that hit home, but the INFP description fit better overall.)

So I'm still a strong introvert, but I am coming out of my shell. Crowds still drain me, but I can work comfortably in small groups with people I know. I can handle those annoying shmooz parties, provided there are drink tickets at the back of my conference ID badge....

I've shifted from J to P, which is really weird (assuming the profile holds any weight). It means I've Extroverted my Intuition and Introverted my Feelings. That means my feelings have become dominant over my intuition. With that, I've also shifted more to Feeling, from Thinking, but I'm still more Intuitive than Sensing (though less starkly than before).

http://www.personalitypage.com/html/portraits.html gives nice long write-ups on the personality types.

So that's interesting, because the description for INFP says I don't deal well with hard facts. Weird, being a physicist and all... but it would also explain why I haven't been as interested in my research as perhaps I could be, as much as I see other scientists diving in and me just being like "so, what's for dinner?" I've been wondering what was up with that? It also says I'm better at writing than speaking (true), and that I'd be a good teacher (which I've been much more interested in lately than research). Unaware of mundane life stuff? Check. Flexible and laid-back, do not like conflict? Check.

I'm struggling with this idea of my personality changing. I don't know why that bothers me, but it does. Like, am I losing "me?" Or am I just gaining new ways of interacting with the world? I re-read the INFJ and INTJ, trying to hold on, but they didn't fit perfectly. Actually, none of them fit perfectly... which just goes to show that as you grow intentionally, you start to break the confines of limited profiles, and become an entirely new sort of entity. At least, that's what I'm choosing to take away from this.
I don't need labels to define me. They're sticky and I hate the glue they leave behind.
Reply With Quote
Old 01-14-2015, 09:52 AM
kullervo kullervo is offline
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 9
Default Myers Briggs and relationship dynamics

I see the topic of Myers Briggs personality types and their prevelance in the polyamorous community has been discussed at length in a previous thread. I'm quite sure a variety of different personality types would be interested in polyamory although can imagine ESTJ's having some difficulty :-). However, what I am interested in is how personality types of those involved play a role in how a relationship evolves.

For example, I would theorize that Introverts would probably tend to prefer a few intimate long term relationships, while extraverts may be more comfortable with many shorter term relationships. I don't think one can generalize, but it would be interesting to know if there is indeed such a general trend.

Similarly, I would speculate that J's would prefer to have quite a number of rules that need to be followed, whilst P's may tend to prefer to let things develop spontaneously and not try to cage them in too much. If this is indeed the case, I can imagine it being difficult for a J/P coupling to negotiate the common rules. J's would probably not like surprises, and P's tend to appreciate a surprise every now and then.

I can also imagine that Thinkers would approach things differently from Feelers, especially where those little mishaps happen. Feelers may take things more personally and need a lot of support in getting over feelings of betrayal, whereas Thinkers may have a more pragmatic approach of "shit happens". This in itself I think could be a problem where a Thinker and a Feeler have to work things out, especially if the Thinker has reached a point of saturation of discussing emotional issues and the Feeler has not been able to process his/her emotions properly yet.

Can anybody relate to this? Have you experienced any other interesting dynamics with your partners that could make sense from a MBTI perspective?

P.S., I am an INFJ(sometimes INFP), wife an INFJ.
Reply With Quote
Old 01-14-2015, 05:19 PM
kdt26417's Avatar
kdt26417 kdt26417 is online now
Official Greeter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Yelm, Washington
Posts: 7,568

  • Introverted and I have just a few long-term relationships,
  • iNtuitive and don't know what to look for relationship-wise,
  • Feeling and while I have had considerable upset in the past, I'm pretty laid back now. Possibly due to the meds I take.
  • Judging and I usually don't like surprises. We have a collection of rules big and small. The small rules actually matter more to me than the big rules.
I used to be a communication hog. Now, not so much.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
Reply With Quote
Old 01-15-2015, 03:04 PM
Bluebird's Avatar
Bluebird Bluebird is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Maryland
Posts: 850

I am still an ENFJ.

I've overheard at least two people describe me as "the nice kind of extrovert who makes you feel calm." Lol

Yeah, I just warn people that I talk too much and feel free to cut me off anytime.

Interesting fact - both my loves are introverts.
Unapologetically Poly

Hinge in a poly-fi vee with two mono men
Wife to DarkKnight and PunkRockAwesomesauce

My Online Journal

Last edited by Bluebird; 01-15-2015 at 03:07 PM.
Reply With Quote
Old 01-15-2015, 04:03 PM
YouAreHere's Avatar
YouAreHere YouAreHere is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: SoNH
Posts: 1,042

Was initially an ESTJ, but am now an ESFJ. Still pretty borderline between T/F, at any rate, but after having kids, the balance tipped in the other direction.

This, BTW... This, this, THIS: (from http://www.personalitypage.com/ESFJ.html )
All ESFJs have a natural tendency to want to control their environment. Their dominant function demands structure and organization, and seeks closure. [...] They do enjoy creating order and structure, and are very good at tasks which require these kinds of skills. ESFJs should be careful about controling people in their lives who do not wish to be controlled.

ESFJs respect and believe in the laws and rules of authority, and believe that others should do so as well. They're traditional, and prefer to do things in the established way, rather than venturing into unchartered territory. Their need for security drives their ready acceptance and adherence to the policies of the established system.[...]

An ESFJ who has developed in a less than ideal way may be prone to being quite insecure, and focus all of their attention on pleasing others. He or she might also be very controling, or overly sensitive, imagining bad intentions when there weren't any.
A lot of the ESTJ text rings true as well, except I'm not nearly as black-and-white when it comes to seeing other people's perspectives. I also have no interest in joining the PTA.

Chops is very "seat of the pants" and despite how great a match we are for each other in various other ways, this has always been a source of confusion and/or conflict between us. Boy, am I seriously bucking my own nature (stability, control, and nice road maps) by even being here in the first place!

Dramatis personae:
Me: Mono. Divorced, two kids (DanceGirl, 14; and PokéGirl, 11), two cats, one house, many projects.
Chops: My partner. Poly. In relationships with me, Xena, and Noa.
Xena: Poly. In relationships with Chops and Noa, and dating others.
Noa: Married, Poly. In relationships with Chops and Xena (individually).

Blog thread: A Mono's Journey Into Poly-Land (or, "Aw hell, there's no road map?!")
Slightly more polished blog with a mono/poly focus: From Baltic to Boardwalk
Reply With Quote
Old 01-22-2015, 10:21 PM
schizofish schizofish is offline
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Cornwall, UK
Posts: 18


Introvert(33%) iNtuitive(38%) Feeling(12%) Judging(56%)
•You have moderate preference of Introversion over Extraversion (33%)
•You have moderate preference of Intuition over Sensing (38%)
•You have slight preference of Feeling over Thinking (12%)
•You have moderate preference of Judging over Perceiving (56%)

Which is apparently fairly rare:


And makes me The Protector. I am surprised how much of it I can relate to.

And in case anyone is doing the stats on this:

Pisces (like you couldn't guess from the name?)
Quality time/Physical Touch
Schizofish, 42yo female, in polyship with:

-Njord, 51M mostly LDR lover
-Wayland, 40M FWB, who is in a LTR with Odette
Reply With Quote
Old 01-23-2015, 03:46 AM
opalescent opalescent is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: US
Posts: 1,450

I generally test as an INFJ as well. I am quite interested in this unscientific, self selected survey in part because there are a number of INFJs posting. For a rare type, it seems odd.
Reply With Quote
Old 01-23-2015, 05:55 PM
kdt26417's Avatar
kdt26417 kdt26417 is online now
Official Greeter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Yelm, Washington
Posts: 7,568

INFJ's unite! (separately, in your own homes.)
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
Reply With Quote

myers briggs, personality, personality test, personaltiy test, psychology

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT. The time now is 10:26 PM.