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Old 03-15-2016, 03:58 PM
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Spork Spork is online now
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Default Taming Your Mammoth

This article has nothing to do with polyamory specifically. I am sharing it here because part of being successfully polyamorous...in fact, part of being successful at anything PERIOD, especially relationships, is being ~self aware~.

What does that even mean?

It's a challenge. Well, in talks with one of our other posters here, I have run up against something I've encountered with others, and occasionally in myself. Pinning all of your identity and self-worth on a relationship, on the opinion and love and acceptance and validation of another person, to the point where losing them shakes the very foundations of your reality and can even threaten your desire to continue living. See, this has nothing to do with that other person. It's got EVERYTHING to do with you, the person who cannot live without so-and-so. You are listening to your mammoth.

Anyhow, it's a great read:

http://waitbutwhy.com/2014/06/taming...-run-life.html

Me: "I can be anyone! Anyone who would please you! Want me to wear a dress? I can wear a dress! Please, please tell me who to be for you..."
Disastrous fling guy: "I...actually...I'm kinda losing interest. I have a thing. To do. I'm uh...busy...watching the Republican Debate with my cats tonight. Sorry!"
Me: "I'M WORTHLESS TO THE PEOPLE I WANT TO LOVE ME AND I'LL NEVER BE HAPPY AND EVERYTHING SUCKS NOW."

Stupid mammoth is stupid.
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Spork 37 F
Analyst 40ish M- boyfriend, poly w/ Fire, friends w/ Hefe.
Fire & Hefe F&M 40ish- Married couple in poly quad w/ Analyst & me.
Zen Sadist mid 50's, M - In a sadomasochistic Top/Bottom relationship w/ me. Friendly-acquainted w/ the others.

Vanilla/blood family:
Old Wolf- Ex-hubs
Ninja- 17 yr old son
Q- 14 yr old son
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Old 03-20-2016, 12:51 AM
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Tri46guy Tri46guy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spork View Post
It is a great read - thanks for sharing this.
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