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Old 02-11-2014, 08:55 AM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,401

It's not my thing, but lots of people have no objection to their partner getting it on in the other room. Auto thinks it's hot when Zoffee and Cue do it upstairs.

In this big crazy world, if there's anything you've known someone to do once, there's a good chance that hundreds or thousands of people do it on a regular basis.

If your gf and her gf having sex in the other room is a hard limit for you, then your choices are pretty clear. You can't control their behaviour, but you can remove yourself from the situation.

In response to the first question... I generally think that if any relationship is more pain than pleasure, it's probably not healthy. Unhealthy relationships can either be abandoned, fixed, or tolerated. Tolerating unhealthy relationships really destroys your soul, so I don't recommend that option. Fixing relationships requires effort from all involved parties and is only an option if they're willing to meet you halfway. Jumping ship is the only option that can be executed by one unhappy sailor.
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.
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Old 02-11-2014, 12:46 PM
Magdlyn's Avatar
Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 6,025

Originally Posted by civfan View Post
Wow, just spent an hour and a half on the phone arguing with my gf and her gf about reading up more and trying to solve the jealousy created in me when they have sex while I am in the other room! Even this doesn't happen in the poly kingdom does it, anyone really have sex with a secondary while a primary is in the other room?
Yes, I have sex with my bf while my gf is in the other room. Sometimes when she is in the room (like if we are all watching TV together and bf and I start messing around). Sometimes we all have sex together, as you and your gf and her gf used to do!

But I have read here of some people new to poly going mad with jealousy if their partner has sex with their OSO in the next room. So, advice is, get out of the house, or ask the other 2 to have sex at OSO's place. Or, after the 2 gfs are done, your gf could come in to you and take care of your sexual needs. I quite often do this, go take care of gf after being with bf, in case she felt aroused or left out after hearing me and him getting it on.

I am sorry your communication is not going well.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

Mags (poly, F, 61) loving Pixie (poly, F, 39) since January 2009, living together since 2013
"Master," (mono, M, 36), Pixie's Dom for 3+ years
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