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Old 02-01-2011, 02:23 AM
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MaybeSparrow MaybeSparrow is offline
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 13


I'm 26, female, and live in NJ. I identify as heteroqueer: I'm a cisgender chick who likes dick and it just goes off the beaten path from there (genderfluid, kinky, poly, childfree, ally). I'm sort-of new to poly; I was in a poly relationship when I was 19-20, and it didn't work out so well... then I was in a monogamous relationship for 4 years, and that didn't work out so well either... so for the past year and a half I've taken a step back so I could sort my mind out before getting into another capital-R-relationship. I've come to the executive decision that I don't want to be in a monogamous relationship. I have a friend with benefits (my Gentleman Caller, as I like to refer to him) who I've been hanging out with for the past year or so, as well as a submissive.

I'm Neo-Pagan, progressive, and feminist. I'm chipping away at a Master's in Social Work, with an interest in women's issues and LGBT issues. I'm all about the fat acceptance movement, and I'm trying to figure out how to work that into my education. I love theater, film, music (mostly indie rock), yoga, cooking, travelling, going to art museums, and talking about myself online.
Find me out
I'm not just made of hearts
Oh you can break right through this box
You put me into

--Sleater Kinney, "Heart Factory"
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Old 02-03-2011, 02:47 AM
Jimithia Jimithia is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 3

Greetings and salutations!

Obviously I'm new to this site and new to polyamory. I am a single panromantic asexual interested in trying out a poly relationship. I've not had much (good) experience with dating in the past, but I'm trying to be more open and not be so scared to let other people into my life. I am currently enrolled as a full-time student at Uni with a focus on majoring in Music. I enjoy drawing and writing, anything artsy I currently live in central Georgia but plan on moving after I'm done with college.
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Old 02-06-2011, 03:12 AM
fiftyonewrens fiftyonewrens is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 2
Default Newness moving

I'm new...to this board and polyamory. I've have poly folks in my life, I've never been opposed to it, but I've always been in monogamous relationships. Serial monogamy no doubt.

My current partner is not new to polyamory. She had been through a series of unsuccessful poly dynamics over the previous 4 or 5 years however, so where I've heard the NRE might wear off, we went into a monogamous relationship. That is to say, I knew she was polyamous from the beginning but we had a series of conversations where she stated matter-of-factly, she wanted a monogamous relationship. She said she didn't that was going to always been true but it was defiantly true at that moment. Somehow I found myself oblivious to the possibly that meant immediate future because shortly after the shift to monogamy, conversations about babies and weddings started happening. It never occurred to me that polyamory could even be a part of this monogamous future that would take years to build.

Flash forward about 18 months and here I am. New to a polyamory message board. My partner told me about a month ago she felt like she wasn't being true to herself. She felt like she was suffocating, and a rope was around her; she felt oppressed and as if she had no freedom to do anything, She told me these things in a desperate, tearful, voice-saying it was physically difficult to breath at times.

I love my partner. I don't want her to feel those things! So...long story short, I started reading about poly. A fact finding mission mostly. I looked at all the things on these boards, and all over the interwebs. I've read a few books now, 'Opening Up' being the one I think I liked the best.

After what feels like careful thinking, several conversations later, I've decided I think I'd like to try poly. I'm not sure what happens now but....I'm trying it I guess! Right now it just feels like I mean "Hey, partner, I don't want you to feel miserable! Please, do what you need to feel a happy full life".

I don't really know what to say from there....I'm just saying here I am, new to poly and new to this board. and glad for a thread I could say these things in.
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Old 02-14-2011, 01:54 AM
sssampso sssampso is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Asheville NC
Posts: 4
Default seeking polyamorous female Asheville NC

Asheville NC . I am 28, 5'7", and fit. I am a physically active, attractive, friendly, outgoing, funloving, respectable man in a polyamorous relationship looking for a companion for a longterm friendship and romance. I am interested in women ranging in age from 20 to 50 years old who are compatable. I normally have no problem finding a date, but have had trouble finding a women that is comfortable with the poly lifestyle. I am glad to share photos, conversation, maybe an afternoon of hiking/biking/talking/walking/dancing/dinning etc. if you have any interest in getting to know me.
My wife and I are high school sweethearts, together since my
Junior year in HS (1999) and have been married for 5 years. We are both natives of Western NC. Since about 2 years before we got married we have been vary open with each other about the possible desires for intimate relationships outside of our own. We spent years feeling this way, but uncertain of what avenues we could use to allow a nonmonagamous relationsip to exist. We decided to join an online swingers group (we are
sampson26 on SLS). We have been disappointed with this approach in that it mostly connected us with people looking for cheep flings as apposed to the meaningful, sensual, fulfilling relationships that we both desire. We have since looked elsewhere and have both mannaged to find lovers on our own just by letting our close friends know about our desires for what we now know is polyamory.
Currently my wife is in a stable relationship, with a longtime friend who is also Poly and I am hoping to also find a steady, compatable partner.
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Old 02-21-2011, 03:40 AM
NJPolyMusician NJPolyMusician is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Princeton, NJ
Posts: 2
Default 35, straight male, NJ, in an open marriage

I'm just going to copy and paste from PMM, so here goes:

I've been told that I'm a laid-back and very accepting guy. I am also affectionate, loyal, passionate, analytical, and loyal. My biggest interest in life is taking in new experiences, instead of living life in a boring, routine way. Other interests of mine include traveling, going to concerts or shows, and playing/watching sports, in particular football.

I get along very well with other people and very much enjoy the company of others, especially when doing an activity together. By trade, I am a professional musician and a computer techie.

My wife is also polyamorous, but I am not looking for a triad or group setting. Our relationship is better described as an open marriage in which we are free to see other people.

I would say the first thing people notice about me is that I'm very welcoming. I love meeting new people and getting to know them better. I consider myself to be good-looking, intelligent, and easy to get along with. I don't really get crazy that often, but I just might when I'm playing music, especially in a jam session setting. I also let loose around sporting events, particular my first sports love, football. What Iím not interested in doing is the same old thing.

If you looked at my iTunes playlist, you'll mostly find songs by They Might Be Giants, The Beatles, The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Dream Theater, Spiraling, Moxy Fruvous, Great Big Sea, Eddie From Ohio, The Nields, Dave Carter and Tracy Grammer, Billy Joel, Ben Folds, Guster and Erin McKeown.

You should also message me if youíre looking for someone who is willing to try new things, enjoy sharing music and concerts/shows with, and willing to show someone who is new to the polyamory a thing or two. I am very willing to learn about this exciting new lifestyle.

I'm looking women, married or single, age 25-43, and is looking for new friends or a relationship, either short or long-term. She should also be laid-back, great company to be with, intelligent, and interested in trying new things.

Glad to meet you all!
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Old 03-03-2011, 07:49 PM
Melnkof Melnkof is offline
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 5


I live in Michigan. I am a 5'5'' blonde, green eyed woman who has a hard time getting close to other people. Once I let people get close enough, expect me to be loyal and willing to do anything for the people I love.

I am new to polyamory. I've been happily married for eleven years, and my husband and I are just now exploring the options of being polyamorous. I mostly date men, but I am open to the idea of a female relationship as well.

I work part time from home and am a stay at home mom to three amazing daughters. I got married at 18 to my high school sweetheart.

My husband and I have been talking about the possibilities of being polyamorous for years now, and it was only just recently that he found a woman he wanted to date seriously. Up to this point we have been monogamous in our relationship.

I am so glad to have found a site with like-minded people!
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Old 03-05-2011, 11:06 PM
visrose visrose is offline
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Eastern PA
Posts: 6

Hello Forum!

I am a 42 year old woman from Eastern PA. I am recently divorced (last month) from a 18 year marriage, and a 13 year triad. My ex and I were open before we were married, and when we fell in love with our third, we realized we were poly.
It's a long story how everything ended, and I will go into it sometime, if anyone is interested. Anyway, I am trying to find out who I am now that I am no longer an "us". It's a slow road, a tough road, but a pretty cool one too, and I have a few poly friends helping out.
I just love this resource!
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Old 03-09-2011, 07:05 AM
o7dtree o7dtree is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 2
Default Me...poly?

Hi my name is Bernard. I am a 27 year old man living in the Boston metro area.
I recently became involved with a openly poly woman and we have a loving relationship.
As of now we have agreement which allows for fun with others but not sex. This is fine with me as I am new to poly. It has been hard for me at times to fight jealousy when I see her enjoying herself with others when we go out. Tonight for example she obviously smitten with a long term friend visiting from out of town. It was hard not to smile when I saw her so happy like that at the same time I was sad that tonight she would be cuddling with him and not me. The issue for me is not physical intimacy with others as much as losing time with her.
Anyway I have been trying to educate myself about poly and think it may be the right choice for me as I always find myself wanting more from my previous mono partners than they could give.
Perhaps having more than one partner may fulfill my needs. My current Girlfriend Liz has suggested that perhaps I find another partner besides her as we are both extremely busy with work and school and often have conflicting schedules.
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Old 03-09-2011, 07:18 AM
o7dtree o7dtree is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 2

I hear you there....Im new to this all myself, and my lover and I initially agreed upon being mostly mono. As of yet she has yet to express feelings such as your lover has. At the same time I must admit that there is another woman I like but dont even know where to begin to explain my feelings and that we could date and I could still maintain my current relationship. For now we are just friends. Its really hard and confusing. Lately Ive been doing a lot of reading about poly, and it has really helped my ability to articulate my feelings. I excited to see where this all leads.
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Old 03-14-2011, 05:46 PM
Beardie Beardie is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 1

Hello to All!

I am a 26 year old, married female who just entered into polyfidelity (along with my husband) with an amazing woman. She is wonderful and we seriously adore her. This is the first for all of us so we are all very nervous and somewhat fearful. She has abondonment and trust issues so she has problems with pushing us away at times. Furthermore, though my relationship with my new gf has blossomed, my relationship with my husband seems to be suffering somehow. I have tried to reassure him and let him know that these small arguments we have are going to stop eventually but he is under the impresssion that he is never going to be able to make the 2 of us happy and has suddenly become very negative about the whole thing. I really believe that this is just the eventual dissenigration of our married relationship so that we can rebuild our hearts to include this new person but he isn't so sure. Does anyone have any advice on this matter?

I am happy to be apart of this group and appreciate any responses I get.

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