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  #31  
Old 08-09-2009, 06:36 PM
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ThirdWheel ThirdWheel is offline
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Originally Posted by XYZ123 View Post
Unless something goes seriously wrong emotionally between you two, I don't think she'd leave you for a man simply because he is a man.
Since i am the third wheel I don't worry too much about her leaving me for her husband...LOL! She and I get along extremely well and that does occaisionally cause some issues betwen her and her husband. He and I are friends and have talked quite a lot about our situation, but it is still hard for him sometmes and I can understand why, she's a really great person.

We even broke up briefly because he couldn't handle the situation any longer and she and I were absolutely miserable. But he had a change of heart and now we're all back together. He and I as friends and she and I as lovers (bf/gf).

I guess the point of my previous post was to say, don't worry about a man offering her something you can't (i.i a penis), just offer what you have emotionally and be there for her. If there's a love there meant to last, she will appreciate that much more.
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  #32  
Old 08-09-2009, 06:44 PM
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ThirdWheel ThirdWheel is offline
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Originally Posted by XYZ123 View Post
I was raped by a bf repeatedly when a teen, and again by someone I thought was friend years later. There was nothing intimate about it.
There is never anything intinmate about forced rape! On behalf on the male of the species, I appologize. Rape is about anger and domination and the a-holes who do that should be shipped off to a desserted island and given a pistol with one bullet.

I hope you know that there are men in the world who are grown ups and treat women with respect.

A little education goes a long way, support education initiatives in your area. End public service annoucement here.
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  #33  
Old 08-10-2009, 06:07 PM
XYZ123 XYZ123 is offline
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Sorry ThirdWheel. I was actually responding to the OP but used what you wrote as a quote because I liked it and thought it tied well to what I wanted to say. But thank you.

Yeah...being raped sucks. I know that's the understatement of the year, but I've done alot to move past it so I sorta don't look back too much. I have an amazing hubby and many male friends. I don't look down on the male species because of what happened. I did fear men for awhile, but women can do horrible things as well so I've moved on. Though I wouldn't even give the guys a bullet. Just an unloaded gun. Let em suffer.
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  #34  
Old 08-15-2009, 03:50 AM
AJbear77 AJbear77 is offline
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Default I don't know

Thanks for all your nice responses. I just don't know. I think I give a little too much importance to the male penis, I suppose...LOL. I have all these issues surrounding this, but still reading a lot on it, like I am supposed to figure it out...supposed to get to some kind of place with it inside. I am still working it out. I don't know what I want or why, and why I can't stop reading about poly. It is so intriguing. I mean, many people just know they are poly...like how I just always knew I was gay. It is confusing. I do love love. I feel that I am more monogamous, but don't know if that is fear or from the cultural influence or just me. I do have a long distance friend I made about 6 months ago and I just love her dearly. The kind of love that you want to express in more ways than one...but not just desire. When me and my partner started talking about this a few weeks ago, I did tell my partner about my strong feelings for this woman. she already knew that I felt very kindred with her. It is not that I think this woman necessarily feels the same way...she is with a man and all that, and she lives about as far from me as possible, but my point is the feelings are there. I do feel like with her and my partner right now, my bases are pretty much covered. Whew...anyway.
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  #35  
Old 08-15-2009, 03:03 PM
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Originally Posted by AJbear77 View Post
many people just know they are poly...like how I just always knew I was gay.
My husband asked me the other day why we are doing this and I thought of when I came out years ago. He asked me what my intention was and I had no answer for him for a bit, because really I have no idea... with more conversation I came to the conclusion that it is just my path. I am following my path. I have never been happier or more complete and this is how I know it's right for me. Nothing more really. When I came out it was for the same reason. It was my path.
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