Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Fireplace

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #31  
Old 10-16-2013, 03:32 PM
Magdlyn's Avatar
Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 3,626
Default

Breastfeeding in public= feeding a child. It is not sexual. No more sexual than you eating a sandwich from Subway in a public park.


Breastfeeding causing orgasms is EXTREMELY rare. So rare as to practically be non-existent. A hormone is released during breastfeeding, called oxytocin. This hormone causes contractions of various organs during labor/childbirth, during menstruation, during orgasm. It is also released during cuddling and eating. It is a calming hormone as well, which causes bonding between individuals. Breastfeeding mothers become bonded to their babies when this hormone is released. Families become bonded during shared meals when this hormone is released. The oxytocin release during breastfeeding soon after childbirth helps the uterus regain its non-pregnant size, and also reduces bleeding from the placental site.

Now, oxytocin release during labor and orgasm is quite high. Oxytocin release during breastfeeding or while eating a meal is quite low. Do you cum while eating that sandwich from Subway? Probably not. Does the mother breastfeeding on a bench opposite from you cum while feeding her baby? Just as likely not. The feeling she is having is calmness and love for her baby, more like sexual *afterglow* intensity, which is pleasurable, and nature's way of keeping her sitting there feeding that baby until it has had enough to eat.
__________________
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37
Reply With Quote
  #32  
Old 10-16-2013, 04:00 PM
Dirtclustit Dirtclustit is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Middle of Oregon
Posts: 431
Default only in isolated places

such as nudist colonies where people of similar enough points of view can gather, those are the only places where it works for people to go around naked in front of others they don't necessarily know.

The world is a long, long, long ways from having the level of respect that is necessary to allow the level of nudity that this thread is talking about. And to be honest, I doubt that it can ever happen as a worldwide type of freedom and that is actually a good thing.

Most people don't realize what that level of respect actually entails, and if they did I don't think many people would consciously choose to do the extra work necessary to show that level of respect. It takes a lot of practicing just to get to the point where being respectful enough doesn't feel like a pain in the ass, as if it is far too oppressive to comply.

So what actually works out better for everyone, is to have different states, wherein each state people having a certain level of similar beliefs can congregate or populate specific geographic areas. It is takes much less conscious effort and reflection one's own behavior to be respectful to those who you somewhat agree with.

The level of differences tolerated in the peoples beliefs will match the level that people are willing to put in the effort. People typically have no problem with being respectful to those of a somewhat different set of beliefs, in fact people prefer some differences as it gives them a more well rounded view on life and not such a narrow outlook. But it is only up to that point which they appreciate the differences that people are compatible, and the boundaries are typically drawn out in countries.

Hopefully one day there will be a better way than to spend as much time and money as the world spends on weapons used for destruction, military, and war. But all that will remain until there is an honest understanding of what it means to respect those whose beliefs are too different to be able to live in the same country

Last edited by Dirtclustit; 10-16-2013 at 04:07 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #33  
Old 10-16-2013, 05:36 PM
ColorsWolf's Avatar
ColorsWolf ColorsWolf is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: CA, U.S.A.
Posts: 362
Default

I like how this thread is progressing.~ ^_^
Reply With Quote
  #34  
Old 10-16-2013, 11:26 PM
kdt26417's Avatar
kdt26417 kdt26417 is online now
Official Greeter
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Olympia, Washington
Posts: 4,992
Default

Re (from ColorsWolf):
Quote:
"Please re-word your phrasing of the male genitalia as that is highly insulting."
Hmmm, no insult was intended, just trying to lighten up so as to avoid giving offense in a rather large group of people.

But let me not give offense here either. What I meant was *penis,* yes, P-E-N-I-S.

So to correct my original paragraph, here is what I meant:

Nudity = all natural, it's just a state of being. But wait, what if some poor fellow wants to be a naturist, and finds that his *penis* is starting to get excited? Is it time for him to cover up? Is it sexual? Is it just natural? It's not like he's *doing* anything to cause the spectacle, is he?

I trust this helps clarify what I was saying, as well as reduces the insulting nature of my prior wording? If not, I'm wide open to suggestions as to the the *right* word to use (e.g., more politically correct, more appropriate, less insulting, less offensive, etc.).

That aside, I'm going to assume that you mean what you said when you said:
Quote:
"As a healthy natural bodily function with the above conditions met, there is absolutely no reason why he should cover himself up."
Excellent! That's the answer to my question.

You also said:
Quote:
"I'm not sure Humanity is ready for a beautiful positive sex-everywhere all the time with no problem-every-day sort of thing.
Until then, let us stick to non-sexual nudity."
Which I take to mean that revealing (via natural nudity) a spontaneous erection is acceptable at this point in time, as long as the man in question isn't masturbating?

Whereas in the future ...?

Re:
Quote:
"This is also why I don't like to associate with many who would call themselves 'nudists' because many of them are hypocritical in following their own philosophy only when it suits them."
Fortunately or unfortunately for me, I'm not personally acquainted with any nudists that I know of. Therefore, I feel as if I am relatively free to speculate about the theoretical conundra that present themselves when contemplating the social implications of consistently giving nature free reign.

Re: breastfeeding ... as a male I'm now completely confused, but until I hear different I guess I'll assume that breastfeeding is no more erotic that eating a Subway sandwich. (Not that my favorite tuna Subway doesn't border on the orgasmic ...)

Dirtclustit seems to feel that different countries should have different standards as far as nudity, self-hatred, bodily hatred, and general hatred are concerned. Which is okay by ColorsWolf?

So what does the more-enlightened, better-evolved future look like? What does it mean for people to relinquish all forms of hatred? How would we know when we had arrived at that point?

I'm guessing that most people will still be clothed. I welcome any challenges to my guessing.
__________________
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
Reply With Quote
  #35  
Old 10-17-2013, 03:06 PM
Magdlyn's Avatar
Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 3,626
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by kdt26417 View Post
Put it this way, I stay clothed as a public service.
Quote:
Originally Posted by kdt26417 View Post
I don't "hate myself for being fat," but I don't exactly revel in it either. My clothes protect the public.
Hatred is a strong word, but you do seem quite repulsed by your own fatness and the fatness of others. You might want to look more deeply at that, Kevin.

Quote:
If you are in shape, then I envy you. You live in a clothing-optional world in a way that some of us feel we do not.
And I am sad you feel that fat people need to cover up! Some people are quite attracted to those that are carrying some extra weight.

Quote:
I guess the bottom line is that while I think most overweight persons (such as myself) would feel way to embarrassed about undressing anywhere (even in a nude colony), I can't argue with their theoretical right to do so.
You are so wrong, Kevin. The whole point of nudist camps is being free to be naked no matter your body shape or size. Too fat, too thin, too old and saggy, handicapped, small breasts and penis, etc. The idea that only one kind of body, thin, muscular, is acceptable is a sad comment on our society, and you are a victim of this mindset.

Quote:
Yes, I am free to refrain from looking if the person I see makes me shudder (because they look too much like myself). Lots of other things to look at. As long as they're not hurting me.
Feeling so much disgust at seeing a fat person, you shudder, while being fat yourself, seems to be a big issue with you. BTW, your profile pic is of a man with a thin face. Is that not really you?


Quote:
My mom was known to practice some nudity in my childhood home. I gotta tell ya, that's not one of my happier memories. Bad visual!

On the other hand, my younger brother once wandered too near the door to the master bedroom when my folks were going at it. He heard some exclamations from my father that were hard to misinterpret. Permanent damage!

Then there was the time that my oldest brother's first wife decided to try water-skiing with nothing but her garments on. Bad wet T-shirt contest. I'm pretty sure everyone on the boat was permanently traumatized. Don't worry though, she viewed herself as nothing less than a ravishing sex goddess....

Teaching each other to be ashamed of our nude selves per se seems to be a problem, although "shame" rather than "hate" still seems to me to be the more proportionately-accurate word. But I don't know how to solve all these other complicated problems.
Try starting with yourself, man. Your so-called jokes are not in the least bit funny.
__________________
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37
Reply With Quote
  #36  
Old 10-17-2013, 05:34 PM
london london is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: UK - land of the free
Posts: 1,635
Default

Very fat people make me shudder, very skinny people make me shudder. I just find those body types extremely unattractive. The more of their bodies that I can see, the more I shudder. It doesn't matter where I am on that scale, I find it repulsive in other people and i would find it repulsive in myself too. When I see someone morbidly obese in the UK, I do think about the financial burden on the nhs and the inconsistencies in how eating disorders or general weight issues are treated. So I guess I'm an all round bigot against the significantly obese.

Last edited by london; 10-17-2013 at 05:41 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #37  
Old 10-17-2013, 05:45 PM
ColorsWolf's Avatar
ColorsWolf ColorsWolf is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: CA, U.S.A.
Posts: 362
Default

It's okay to express your inner thoughts and feelings here, because this shows us the extent of the damage of being raised with mentally damaging mentalities and here we will encourage you to love yourself and we tell you that you are beautiful because you are!~ ^_^

Love yourself, you are beautiful!~ ^_^
Reply With Quote
  #38  
Old 10-17-2013, 06:00 PM
london london is offline
Banned
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: UK - land of the free
Posts: 1,635
Default

I think its more mentally and physically damaging to be raised with the belief that being an unhealthy weight is absolutely fine. I'm referring to both underweight and overweight people here. I've come across people in both categories who are seriously at risk of morbidity due to their weight, yet they are convinced by their support networks that they are beautiful and at the weight they are supposed to be. It's often due to their cultural beliefs about how women in particular, should look.
Reply With Quote
  #39  
Old 10-17-2013, 06:08 PM
ColorsWolf's Avatar
ColorsWolf ColorsWolf is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: CA, U.S.A.
Posts: 362
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by london View Post
I think its more mentally and physically damaging to be raised with the belief that being an unhealthy weight is absolutely fine. I'm referring to both underweight and overweight people here. I've come across people in both categories who are seriously at risk of morbidity due to their weight, yet they are convinced by their support networks that they are beautiful and at the weight they are supposed to be. It's often due to their cultural beliefs about how women in particular, should look.
Too much body fat percentage can often lead to extremely unhealthy short lives and I agree with you that this not be encouraged.~

Beauty is always dependent upon the person who sees it though, remember that.~
__________________
Love yourself, you are beautiful!~ ^_^

*Believe in yourself, you can do anything*!~ ^_^

Appreciate every thing, every thing is precious.~

Reply With Quote
  #40  
Old 10-18-2013, 12:32 AM
kdt26417's Avatar
kdt26417 kdt26417 is online now
Official Greeter
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Olympia, Washington
Posts: 4,992
Default

Re (from Magdlyn):
Quote:
"Hatred is a strong word, but you do seem quite repulsed by your own fatness and the fatness of others. You might want to look more deeply at that, Kevin."
Well I have a penchant for being my own worst enemy, but such doesn't usually extend to other people. Maybe I feel like if someone else is overweight that doesn't bother me because I don't feel responsible for it. Other than that, all I can tell you is that I am a pretty self-conscious person in general (even if/when slow on the uptake). I tend to want to "protect my faults/weaknesses from public scrutiny."

Re:
Quote:
"And I am sad you feel that fat people need to cover up! Some people are quite attracted to those that are carrying some extra weight."
"Fat people need to cover up" is a little strong compared to my actual philosophy. I personally prefer to cover up, I don't mind what other people do (regardless of their body type). I do think there are probably other people, though, who feel self-conscious like myself. I guess I can just sympathize with that kind of self-consciousness (while being glad for anyone who isn't so self-conscious).

We are in agreement that some people are certainly attracted to someone carrying some extra weight. If that weren't the case, I'd be in trouble, because how would the lady I'm paired with then be attracted to me? Maybe I think I don't understand the attraction, but I'm still conscious and appreciative of it. Again, this is about my self-image, not about my perception of others. I think I have poorly communicated my position in that regard. I know and have known people who were "overweight" who I consider/ed perfectly attractive.

Re:
Quote:
"The whole point of nudist camps is being free to be naked no matter your body shape or size."
Agreed.

Re:
Quote:
"Feeling so much disgust at seeing a fat person, you shudder, while being fat yourself, seems to be a big issue with you."
In all fairness, I've spoken with a fair bit of wry hyperbole throughout this thread. I obviously need to clarify myself. Being "fat" is not a sin. I don't "shudder" at the sight of some "fat" person, even if that person is myself (e.g. in the mirror). Sure if I had a magic wand I'd choose a different body type; that would just be my preference for me. But if it really bothered me that much, wouldn't I just do the dieting and exercise needed to make it happen? Since I don't take that initiative, it must not bother me that much. I do sometimes wonder how one of my younger brothers lucked out with such a cooperative metabolism, but I can't be too jealous of him because I know he has his own challenges/problems in life. We all do.

Re:
Quote:
"BTW, your profile pic is of a man with a thin face. Is that not really you?"
I guess the answer is yes and no? The picture is out-of-date; I'm too lazy and self-conscious to update it. There were times when I was thinner than I was in that picture, so I guess I figure I can get away with it as an average look at myself in mid-life times. In this case, it was 2006.

Re:
Quote:
"Your so-called jokes are not in the least bit funny."
In retrospect, I guess I can see that. Sorry for giving offense, it was not intended.
__________________
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
body, hate, hatred, human, self-hatred

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 06:54 PM.