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  #21  
Old 10-07-2013, 05:19 PM
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Dagferi Dagferi is offline
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Life has been pretty uneventful.

The kids and I spent our usual weekend at Murf's. I always cherish the time I do get with him but sometimes I feel kind of cheated. Friday I couldn't get down there until after 4:30 because the kids don't get off the bus until 3:35. He left for work at 5:30. Didn't get home until after 1am.

Saturday morning he was running errands. Then was getting the car ready to show. We spent the afternoon and evening at the carshow. Which translates to every car guy he knows stopping to chat his ear off. Lol. Afterwards we stopped at his friends house.

I ate something that disagreed with me and wasn't feeling well most of Sunday. We watched football on TV. Murf is playing fantasy football and he is a bit to competitive about it. He focus was on where his points were at and etc. I enjoy football myself but it is hard to enjoy watching my Bears play when he is carrying on about what his points and blah blah blah.

Don't get me wrong I would rather see him than not. But some quality time would have been nice. It is what it is though.

I also figured out my sleep problem when I am at home with Butch. I have become a very light sleeper. I can't sleep with him snoring and he snores badly. My back is killing me. I ended up sleeping on the couch. I cannot keep trying to live on 3 hours sleep. My couch is not comfortable to sleep on and Butch is being Ann ass and has no concern for me. He will not switch off with me and sleep on the couch one or two nights a week I have just about had it with him.
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40 yo straight female
Married in the eyes of the government to Butch since 2001...
Murf my monogamous second husband has been with me since May of 2012.
In a V relationship with an average 60/40 split of time. Only due to Murf's and Butch's crappy work schedules.

Last edited by Dagferi; 10-07-2013 at 05:22 PM.
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  #22  
Old 10-07-2013, 09:51 PM
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Dagferi Dagferi is offline
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Spoke with Murf before he headed into work. He told me he slept like crap since I wasn't there. That he missed me. I still grin like a teen with a crush when he calls or texts me.

When I talked with Butch this afternoon about his snoring and me needing more sleep a couple days a week he promptly turned it into a bondage scenario. "you could just bondage me up and put me in the spare room." Barf gag he just doesn't get it or doesn't want to. I don't know which it is.
__________________
40 yo straight female
Married in the eyes of the government to Butch since 2001...
Murf my monogamous second husband has been with me since May of 2012.
In a V relationship with an average 60/40 split of time. Only due to Murf's and Butch's crappy work schedules.
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  #23  
Old 10-07-2013, 10:04 PM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
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Next time Butch tries to pull any of the BDSM stuff on you I wonder what would happen if you said something like "for someone who wants to be a slave you sure seem to be demanding people do what you want them to".
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  #24  
Old 10-08-2013, 02:54 AM
wildflowers wildflowers is offline
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Earplugs can work wonders. At least they're worth a shot;everything is much harder when you're short on sleep.
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  #25  
Old 10-08-2013, 03:30 AM
FullofLove1052 FullofLove1052 is offline
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Ear plugs, asking him to change the side or position he is sleeping in, and a sleep study might be able to pinpoint the cause.

I wonder what would happen if you took him up on his suggestion to tie him to the bed. I would do it and make sure I got something out of it.
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  #26  
Old 10-09-2013, 11:59 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Those breathe strips that go across the nose are supposed to help prevent snoring, along with propping oneself up on a lot of pillows.
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An excellent blog post against hierarchy in polyamory: http://solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-i...short-version/
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  #27  
Old 10-11-2013, 01:31 AM
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Dagferi Dagferi is offline
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Spending my second day with Murf. Just taking care of household business. Ran errands and paid some bills.

Introduced him to the walking dead last night. Tonight watching the Chicago bears game cuddled up on the couch. Dinner in made by me both nights.

Life is good..
__________________
40 yo straight female
Married in the eyes of the government to Butch since 2001...
Murf my monogamous second husband has been with me since May of 2012.
In a V relationship with an average 60/40 split of time. Only due to Murf's and Butch's crappy work schedules.
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  #28  
Old 10-13-2013, 02:55 AM
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Dagferi Dagferi is offline
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My weekend is so not going the way I want it too due to things beyond my control. I am a bit moody and grumpy.

Butch is off this weekend. Tried to set a new dynamic between us. Hopefully he can respect my boundaries.

This is Murf's weekend to work. I miss him terribly when we are apart. I talk to him several times a day so I do not understand why I do not like to be apart from him. I am one of those people who loves and needs her privacy. I was the kid who would go away to summer camp and my family would get 2 letters from me.

I have never shied away from traveling solo, or eating out alone or seeing a movie solo. Never needed anyone before. But I need Murf. I feel guilty about that. I should feel similar about Butch but I don't. He is downstairs sleeping on the couch and I would be happy if he stayed there all night.

Don't get me wrong I enjoy Butch's company, BUT he needs constant attention and stimulation. He has to fill the silence with conversation. If I have something to say I say it but I do not need to have mindless communication. I enjoy the silence and my own thoughts.
__________________
40 yo straight female
Married in the eyes of the government to Butch since 2001...
Murf my monogamous second husband has been with me since May of 2012.
In a V relationship with an average 60/40 split of time. Only due to Murf's and Butch's crappy work schedules.
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  #29  
Old 10-15-2013, 06:17 PM
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Dagferi Dagferi is offline
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Unhappy

This week has been just blah...

Got called into job#2 Sunday to cover for a co worker who injured her leg. So I picked up her shift Sunday and yesterday. Taking yesterday meant not seeing Murf. But unfortunately we need the money for both households. Plus Christmas. Feel guilty about being away from Moose and Squirrel three nights in a row despite the fact they seem fine with it. We do not hide family finances from them.

So I won't get to see Murf until this weekend. I haven't went this long without seeing him in over a year. Feeling out of sorts.

But i love what I do and I am good at it. The hours kind if suck but yet they don't. The kids see me. I get to do homework and feed them dinner every night.

Butch is respecting my boundaries. He is happy with me being bossy. Without bringing in bdsm. I am happy to allow him to take off my shoes and rub my feet and legs after a long shift on my feet. I am hoping this happy compromise is one that lasts. I do love him and enjoy his company.
__________________
40 yo straight female
Married in the eyes of the government to Butch since 2001...
Murf my monogamous second husband has been with me since May of 2012.
In a V relationship with an average 60/40 split of time. Only due to Murf's and Butch's crappy work schedules.

Last edited by Dagferi; 10-15-2013 at 06:19 PM. Reason: damn you autocorrect.
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  #30  
Old 10-21-2013, 01:31 AM
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Dagferi Dagferi is offline
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Home from Murf 's house.

It was a so so weekend. Friday was fine. We spent a quiet evening in had pizza for dinner and the kids watched tv. (We haven't had tv at the other house in 6 months due to finances and the fact the kids really don't need to be glued in front of it.) I slept like the dead but I always do when I am with Murf.

Saturday I lost several hours with Murf Directv was scheduled to come between 12-4. Why Butch scheduled the service call then. I do not know. Especially since he had to leave at 2 for work. Long story short.. they didn't show up. They sent the technician to the wrong address. Then wouldn't talk to me about fixing the mess even though I am Butch 's legal wife. Yet when I helped Murf get it they gave me no issues as the girlfriend.

Today we showed the 1969 Olds 442 at a local car show. I got snuggle time on the couch watching football. Unfortunately the kids and I had to head for home. They have school tomorrow.
__________________
40 yo straight female
Married in the eyes of the government to Butch since 2001...
Murf my monogamous second husband has been with me since May of 2012.
In a V relationship with an average 60/40 split of time. Only due to Murf's and Butch's crappy work schedules.
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