Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Poly Relationships Corner

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #11  
Old 06-22-2013, 04:37 PM
Natja's Avatar
Natja Natja is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 823
Default

You can't blame a girl wanting to wait for Thor though....

(and yes, I know men don't have that market cornered but I am attracted to strong, independent minded men who have their act together so, the dearth of them kind of hacks me off).
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 06-22-2013, 08:18 PM
rws0042 rws0042 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Central Ohio
Posts: 11
Default

Thanks for all the things to think about. And the laughs.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 06-22-2013, 10:26 PM
LovingRadiance's Avatar
LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
Posts: 5,398
Default

For us; we do have an agreement that if one of us needs to reach the other-we can call for any reason.

BUT-between the two of us we also have the understanding that we damn well better keep it appropriate. Neither one of us WOULD tolerate that sort of interruption to our date nights.

The key to me though is this- that is between he and her. The only part that is between you and he, is how you and he agree your time should be spent. Therefore-the issue is in how you feel disrespected by him. How he handles the issue with her-is not your business.

Does that make sense?

If for example, my husband calls me and interrupts my date-my date can complain to me regarding how I handle it. But-it's not my date's place to comment regarding my husband's request. My husband has the right to request whatever he wishes in his relationship with me. It's my job to ensure that I am holding myself accountable to each of my relationships....
__________________
"Love As Thou Wilt"
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 06-23-2013, 01:17 AM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,130
Default

I agree, ass-hole moves all around.

The dumbest part is that she was out with friends already having a good time. It's not like she was moping around the house feeling sorry for herself.

My girlfriend's husband's boyfriend always picks his wife up from work and drives her home. If he happens to be visiting at the time, he'll leave to go pick her up, drop her off at home, and then come back over. That's just their arrangement, and it works for everyone.

I suspect there's more to it than the wife just needed a ride home; after all, she didn't ask him to pick her up at the end of the night, she asked him to come join her part way through and stay with her. She was with friends, and surely they had to be getting home somehow. She could have hitched a ride with them. But as was mentioned, none of that has anything to do with you. Your place is to communicate with your boyfriend how you feel about him leaving your date to go be with her, and how you cannot be in a relationship with those terms. Make it clear that this is about you and your needs, not about the wife's behaviour.
__________________
Gralson: my husband (works out of town).
Auto: my girlfriend (lives with her husband Zoffee).

The most dangerous phrase in the English language is "we've always done it this way."
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 06-23-2013, 02:59 AM
MeeraReed MeeraReed is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: East Coast, U.S.
Posts: 352
Default

Just a side note: I really like being part of a community wherein it's normal to refer to "my girlfriend's husband's boyfriend's wife" in conversation!
__________________
Single, straight, female, solo, non-monogamous.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 02:36 PM.