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  #61  
Old 07-11-2013, 04:06 PM
onoma onoma is offline
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Ok, first off... apologies to BoringGuy for resurrecting this thread. I just need to rant a little...

So after yet another breakup, we slowly grew back into talking, back into hanging out, back into cuddling... then got into a big fight last week. The short version is, at some point she actually came up with "no verbal communication" as an idea. We agreed to it, had some more fighting... didn't talk to each other for the weekend.

Now, how do you guys think this week has gone?

Monday: She asks if we can talk about mortgage stuff, I say ok since it's important. Turns out that it was simple stuff she could have emailed me about as we'd agreed. I'm annoyed so I go out, she calls me to ask where I'm going, make a sarcastic comment about my social life, and tell me she loves me and then get me to say it back.

Tuesday: Trying to be out of the house I went to a Toastmaster's club meeting. Get home, she's here and starts chatting with me about the club. I'm annoyed and it shows, so she gets upset about me "giving her dirty looks." (I didn't, I was actually avoiding looking at her.) I remind her we agreed to no verbal communication, she goes upstairs. She finds an excuse to call me 20 minutes later, and we end up getting into a fight. I go to bed, an hour later she comes downstairs and walks into my bedroom and just says she's sorry then climbs into bed with me and we cuddle for a bit and talk about the fight we had last week a little.

Wednesday: I invite some friends out through Facebook. I come home, and of course she's in my apartment despite having given her a good 20 minute warning I was on my way. I'm a little tipsy so I just grab another beer and sit down. Then, of course, she starts telling me I hurt her feelings because I invited out a couple of our mutual friends. This turns into a little bit of an argument, but not too bad... but anyway why the hell did it even happen?

Well, actually I suspect I do know why it happened. I think she just wanted some reason to keep talking to me so she picked a fight.

So yeah, all the advice was to get away and get space... but short of moving out I can't seem to actually get away from her. Even then I'm sure there would be phone calls.

OK... done ranting I guess.

As an aside... err... kinda, anyway. Somewhere between the breakups she wanted to talk about what my dreams were. It's one of the few civil discussions we've had, and I explained that basically I'd like to have something like a "mistress." She asked me if it was just about sex, and I told her no that I just never dated and kind of want some of those experiences I would have had.

Her reply is basically that she's upset about not being "enough" for me. She's brought it up a couple times since, as well... but it leaves me wondering if "just sex" would have been a more acceptable answer for her somehow.

What's that? Are those straws? Sure, I'll try to grasp them!
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  #62  
Old 07-11-2013, 04:32 PM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
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Originally Posted by onoma View Post
So after yet another breakup, we slowly grew back into talking, back into hanging out, back into cuddling... then got into a big fight last week.
Are you just afraid of being alone and she is the only person you have access to? Do you enjoy this kind of drama? I can't fathom how you would continue to dip yourself into this sick association and continue to be surprised by the outcome.

It seems pretty obvious that you want this kind of chaos in your life because you continue to allow it. That's some hard core self-abuse.
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  #63  
Old 07-11-2013, 04:58 PM
london london is offline
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you like all this. this makes you feel loved, doesn't it?
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  #64  
Old 07-11-2013, 05:24 PM
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YouAreHere YouAreHere is offline
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Why is she allowed unfettered access to YOUR apartment? Because of the dog? Sounds like changing the locks would certainly solve part of your problem. Even if I were taking care of a friend's dog, having them hanging out at my apartment when I get home would be pretty unacceptable to me, unless they were actively feeding/walking/cleaning up after said dog.

You have an idea of what you want your personal space to be - make it happen. Ignore her calls. Put your phone on silent. Leave and change the locks. Let her be pissy. Your life is not her life.

Unless you let it be.
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  #65  
Old 07-11-2013, 05:48 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Huh? Why am i the only one who gets an apology? What about everyone else who is annoyed?

I haven't even read the rest of the post(s) but apologizing to me for resurrecting your own thread strikes me as odd. Or was it a joke and i'm not laughing? Then i guess you do owe me an apology after all.
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  #66  
Old 07-11-2013, 05:57 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Now that I've read it, I have just one thing to say.

Marry the bitch. You two are made for each other. Spending your life with the harpy will be easier than what will happen if you do change the locks or move like everyone is saying. She will hunt you down, she will stalk you, she will harass your friends and family. She will vandalize your car, break your windows, show up at your place of employment, etc. Just marry her and cheat. You will at least get frequent breaks from Teh Krazee, and she will hold her denial dear to her heart because it means she gets to claim you as hers to the world. You will not have any trouble finding women who will date a cheating guy, as can be ascertained from what is posted elsewhere on this forum.

This is my free advice to you. If it doesn't work, I'll refund double what you paid for it.
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  #67  
Old 07-11-2013, 08:01 PM
onoma onoma is offline
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Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
Huh? Why am i the only one who gets an apology? What about everyone else who is annoyed?
You were the only one I remember frequently expressing annoyance...

Quote:
I haven't even read the rest of the post(s) but apologizing to me for resurrecting your own thread strikes me as odd. Or was it a joke and i'm not laughing? Then i guess you do owe me an apology after all.
Semi-joking, with a touch of expecting you to be annoyed again. Guess I was right!
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  #68  
Old 07-11-2013, 08:22 PM
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Malfunktions Malfunktions is offline
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Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post

Marry the bitch. You two are made for each other. Spending your life with the harpy will be easier than what will happen if you do change the locks or move like everyone is saying. She will hunt you down, she will stalk you, she will harass your friends and family. She will vandalize your car, break your windows, show up at your place of employment, etc. Just marry her and cheat. You will at least get frequent breaks from Teh Krazee, and she will hold her denial dear to her heart because it means she gets to claim you as hers to the world. You will not have any trouble finding women who will date a cheating guy, as can be ascertained from what is posted elsewhere on this forum.

This is my free advice to you. If it doesn't work, I'll refund double what you paid for it.


Yup, as a woman who has grown up, hung out with and still can only remain friends with guys I can absolutely say the same thing here. Those girls BG mentions are out there.

And ones got her claws in you, poor guy.
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  #69  
Old 07-11-2013, 08:23 PM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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I just want to make it clear that i used the term "annoyed" very loosely. I really don't care what the OP does, but it's "annoying" that he keeps coming back and saying the same things are happening and there's nothing he can do about it. There is nothing more annoying around here than when people think they want to grow and become better individuals, but don't want to take the steps necessary to do that.
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  #70  
Old 07-11-2013, 09:04 PM
onoma onoma is offline
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Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
I just want to make it clear that i used the term "annoyed" very loosely. I really don't care what the OP does, but it's "annoying" that he keeps coming back and saying the same things are happening and there's nothing he can do about it.

This from the same guy who just said " She will hunt you down, she will stalk you,"
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