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  #51  
Old 08-06-2009, 08:39 PM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by vandalin View Post
especially difficult for the keyboard to do when you have to hunt and peck...
well, I am quite the pecker...jeezuz! Nothing is coming out right today
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  #52  
Old 08-08-2009, 04:21 AM
Mark1npt Mark1npt is offline
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Lol Mono....I've heard that about you!
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  #53  
Old 08-10-2009, 06:06 AM
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So as I mentioned in my last "serious" post, Elric and I are working on being "just friends". I know that I hurt him and that he may still be a little wary of my intentions but since he initiated conversation a few days ago, I feel he is avoiding me. I know he is busy and the only time we are ever online at the same time is at night (like now). If I initiate a chat, he'll reply, but seems to just do the general chit chat, never asking questions other than "how's it going" or "how was your day" and usually it's in response to my inquires. Maybe I'm just being paranoid (different temporary insanity) or maybe it's the fact that we've gone from talking basically every night to maybe twice this week and of nothing more substantial then the pleasantries.

I'm wanting to get back to the friendship we had before too fast probably. But I hate the feeling of this ... distance? My heart was smiling a few days ago, but now it's starting to droop again. I don't think he's doing it intentionally to hurt or punish me, he's not that kind of person. I just miss him.

Sorry, guess I just needed to vent a little more. Cajun is asleep and he hears enough from me, I sometimes think, about Elric and everything else. Cajun is still willing, but I guess I'm having a hard time accepting that he's accepting of this...dang mono-societal-upbringing! I did sign up on that polymatchmaker website just to see and maybe connect with the area polys on a platonic level...we shall see how this goes.

edit: oh and he (Elric) didn't bother saying goodnight tonight and he usually has the decency to do that much.
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Last edited by vandalin; 08-10-2009 at 06:16 AM.
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  #54  
Old 08-10-2009, 06:38 AM
Fidelia Fidelia is offline
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Be strong, SisterWoman. Go easy and give it some time. Don't forget to breathe. This will work out. One thing I know: Everything that must be, will be.
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  #55  
Old 08-10-2009, 06:38 AM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by vandalin View Post
accepting that he's accepting of this...dang mono-societal-upbringing!

edit: oh and he (Elric) didn't bother saying goodnight tonight and he usually has the decency to do that much.
I'm sorry you are still hurting Vandalin...but some people are just naturaly Monogamous. People have to accept that as well.

I do sense some anger in your tone, please be patient and the friendship will become what it was meant to be or not to be.

Take care
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  #56  
Old 08-10-2009, 06:46 AM
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vandalin vandalin is offline
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Quote:
I do sense some anger in your tone
You are right, Mono. But I think I'm more angry at myself still than at him. I have never, EVER come this close to destroying a friendship that I valued so much. I'm trying not to punish myself or anything, but I just wish that futile wish, that things could go back to the way they were...

I know deep down to the base of my heart and soul that Elric and I have always been meant to be friends, I have never felt anything this strongly before. I just hate that it's become so hard to talk to eachother, but I will be patient, at least as patient as I can be.

Thank you both.
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  #57  
Old 08-10-2009, 11:09 AM
Mark1npt Mark1npt is offline
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Van, it sounds like he's still wounded and trying to stay a little insulated from you right now. Can you blame him? Just let him know you're mad at yourself and not him. Let him know you'll be there if he ever wishes the old friendship back. Then just give him time. It's about all you can do and as someone already said, what will be, will be.
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  #58  
Old 08-10-2009, 06:49 PM
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I agree with mark. Give him some space and time. I had a similar experience where I started to get desperate not to lose someone that I talked with on line every night. I got empty messages at one point after a disagreement and was concerned for my friendship with him. He was good about telling me he needed space and time and that he was still there and present on line, but didn't want to always be talking. The best thing I did I think was to just get on with other things and drop him a line or a link I thought he would like. This seemed to ease the tension and lighten the air so that eventually we were laughing again and back to having good times. I think it gave him a chance to need me.

I can hear your heart hurting vandalin. For that I am sorry. The polymatchmaker site will get you back in the game I would think. Okcupid was good for me too. Your friendship will either work out or it won't, but at least you will be moving forward.
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  #59  
Old 08-10-2009, 08:22 PM
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Thanks guys. No Mark, I don't blame him one bit. I just hate the feeling of not knowing...don't we all.

I have decided that I'm going back to the old taking turns. It's his turn to initiate a convo again so unless it's been days to a week, I'm not going to initiate, but I will do the link/line thing like you mentioned Redpepper.

As for getting back in the game, I'm not sure how in the game I want to be right now. Still healing from this heartbreak so I'm liking the benchwarmer position but it's good to meet some of the rest of the team (trying to stick with the sports analogy).
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  #60  
Old 08-10-2009, 10:17 PM
Mark1npt Mark1npt is offline
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Van, you just got dusted with a high and tight fastball! Pick yourself up, grab the bat and get back in the box ready to hit again! (just sticking with the sports stuff, lol)
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