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  #11  
Old 06-21-2013, 04:14 AM
sterling119 sterling119 is offline
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Default been a bit since last post

Well it's been a bit since the last post. Update on things, D was gone for work over the weekend last weekend so not much to update on that although J did make it home before she left. She has a whole weekend job a few times a year where she cooks for large groups. No private time for any of us and we went through the weekend without her with me doing some around the house work and J bringing his son to our home for father's day weekend then going to his older daughters on sunday for the day. D came back home early sunday afternoon and relaxed a little and then helped me outside a bit. I know J missed her almost as much as I did. J dropped his son back home after being at his daughters for the day having some fun on the lake. He got back in the early evening and seemed very glad to see D before he had to leave for the week giving her a nice hug and kiss on his arrival. J wanted to get some sleep as he leaves around 1 am for his week away with the travel time and went into the house. D and I talked and she really wanted to spend some quality time asking me if it was ok and of course I said yes to go to him as I have her all week. She had that great smile on her face as she went into the house. Later on when I got done outside I went in to find her with a huge smile on her face and she said they had a nice time, great sex, great cuddle time with both professing their love and contentment with the relationship so far. D asked if it was ok if she went back to his bed for some more cuddle and sleep time before he had to leave for the week and off she went. Very quiet in the room as all they did at that point was cuddle up together but she said it was nice to have him for a while. She woke me briefly when he left for his week and thanked me for the time even though nothing more then cuddling up together.
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  #12  
Old 06-21-2013, 04:25 AM
sterling119 sterling119 is offline
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Default weekend time

D and I have now decided for sure that if possible friday night will be her and J's time every week. It works out better most of the time as it is easy for me to work late and then spend the night at our other home so as not to disturb them and both are very thankful to me for that. They are both now professing love and desire to make things more perm. at this point. D is very happy to have a second "husband" who also loves her and couldn't be more thankful to me for allowing this. I am happy to see her this happy and J is not only happy but now wanting to settle in a little more. This week it may not work out for friday with his work schedule but we have decided if it doesn't work out for friday saturday will automatically be "their" day/night to date and spend the night together with D and I getting this friday together and sunday being up in the air as to what/who spends time or both if we are just around the house. I think at this point we are into a routine that works for all of us. Anyone else out there in the same type of relationship please feel free to let us know how you handle this whole time thing as we are always open to suggestions.
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  #13  
Old 06-24-2013, 09:46 PM
sterling119 sterling119 is offline
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Default Getting better

Not sure anyone is following our blog but I enjoy writing anyway.....Well we made it through another weekend and it was a really good one at that. Friday has become "their night" where they like to spend the whole night together. This last friday J got in from his work week later then he had been but still was there by like 1130 ish I think. D was already in bed but knowing J was coming she had taken the time to be freshly showered and was actually quite ready for him. J came in, showered and met her in our bed. According to D they had a fantastic night, gentle passionate love making, cuddle up after and fall to sleep in eachothers arms. Saturday morning D had to work for a few hours so she was gone when I got up, J was up and had a smile, said they had a great night and was very happy. J went to get his son for the day, came back in the late afternoon and then went to his daughters out by the lake for the evening. Saturday D and I went to dinner, shopping for a bit and came back to watch a game on tv cuddled up together. We had a fantastic night together.....best sex we have had in a long time and went on for a long time. Cuddled up together for the night and got a good nights sleep after both very happy. Sunday this week brought work around the house, gardening, trimming....that kind of stuff. J was home, grilled outside for us and we had dinner on the patio. Watched a little tv, J had gone to bed as he has to get up early for his work week. At bedtime D said she would like to have some time with J so she went to his bedroom and they had another "round" so to speak....sounded like they had fun.....lol. Eventaully she came back to our bed and we slept the night away. All in all a great weekend. D and J are now able to openly profess their affection for each other (took him some time) and things seem good so far....hope they only get better from here as D is so happy and sastified it makes our life together better.
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  #14  
Old 06-29-2013, 11:54 PM
bookbug bookbug is offline
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It is *so nice* to read your blog. You act like adults, share in each other's happiness. It's a beautiful thing.
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  #15  
Old 06-30-2013, 04:23 AM
sterling119 sterling119 is offline
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Default reply to book bug

Thank you so much not only for reading but for the nice comment. We are at a point in our lives where this seems to make sense to us. So far it has been pretty good, not that there are no issues but pretty good none the less. In the last few weeks J has really come to enjoy our company on a different level and D is so content it is cool to see. She still is somtimes walking on egg shells after they are together sexually as she does not want to have it interfere with our relationship but she is getting over some of that as well. There are times I am somewhat jealous but not to the point it is a problem and seeing her happy is what brings me back to earth. We have gotten into another weekend and the day switch didn't work out like we thought it would so they spent the night together in his room last night. It worked out well and actually I have to admit I enjoyed hearing them together. Jealous.....maybe a small bit but it was also kinda hot I have to admit......lol. Both her and I worked today, he is gone with his daughter to a concert tonight and will either be home late tonight or he may stay at his daughters and be home tomorrow. We are both going to be glad to see him although for different reasons.....lol. They now are both saying the L word to each other so I don't see any stop signs in the near future at least. Will post more as it happens and thanks for reading.
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  #16  
Old 07-28-2013, 07:05 AM
monkeystyle monkeystyle is offline
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This might one of the more positive blogs on the site, and I'm glad you're taking the time to write it. It's not an exaggeration when I say it's an absolute pleasure to see people posting here who aren't in the middle of a crisis, or suffering some kind of self-absorbed preoccupation with themselves. This site occasionally reads like a self-inflicted abuse novel, so its great to see something more hopeful. Good luck and keep posting!!!

Last edited by monkeystyle; 07-28-2013 at 07:08 AM.
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  #17  
Old 07-29-2013, 05:00 PM
sterling119 sterling119 is offline
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Default Been a couple of weeks since the last post

Well we have been busy so I haven't posted like I thought I would here. An update to our life so far. D and I had a nice vacation last week going to a nice quiet part of the state. Left sunday and got back friday of the same week. That gave J and D their friday night together both weeks that they love so much and I am happy to give it to them as they both seem happy to have it. This last week we came back home on friday afternoon and went to a get together with some old friends for a nice evening. J was actually home when we left but was going to visit family for a few hours while we were gone. Got back around 11 and I gathered my things to go to our other house as J was on his way home, we actually passed eachother on the way.....lol. They had a fantastic night together according to D as they had missed some of the previous weekend. I was told they went pretty much stright to bed that night having wonderful sex and sleeping curled up together. They went to breakfast the next morning before J left to see his daughter and son for the day. D was all smiles when I got back and thanked me for a great end to our vacation. Saturday was busy with lawn and gardening that had been neglected for the week while we were gone and by the time J got back we were done for the day. We sat, talked and enjoyed time over a couple of drinks before D and I went to bed for the night. Sunday J's son was there and more things got done around out place. J had to leave for work in the evening instead of the late night/early morning time that he normally leaves in so we said our good byes he is gone for another week. Got a funny thing about the week before on friday though.....J was home on thursday that week and they spent the night together since I was gone for the night on business. I got back friday night and I guess I forgot that it was actually friday due to the trip. Went upstairs to get in bed as I had talked to D the day before and she said she would be in bed when I got back and see me then or in the morning. Since I had lost track I just went up to bed and opened the door to find J and D cuddled up together....kinda not expecting it and stood there for a minute before thinking....it is friday isn't it.......lol. They looked so peacfull and happy I just closed the door and went back downstairs. We all had a good laugh about it the next day. Just thought I would share. Hope everyone that reads is doing well and I will post again soon.
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  #18  
Old 08-19-2013, 11:54 PM
sterling119 sterling119 is offline
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Default Wow guess it has been a while since a post.

Hello to anyone who has followed my postings here....it has been a while with all the summer stuff going on. For those interested in our life here are a few updates. D and I are doing well, her "other husband" J is also well and seems happy with the whole relationship. J and I remain friends and are still getting along well and I believe he is becoming more settled into the poly life. They still spend friday together most every week and also get some time sunday evening before J leaves for work. He has a few times come back from his week away at work early and we work out that extra time as it happens so things seem good. D and I were on vacation for a week this last week so their friday was speical since the next one they would not be together. D said J is much more affectionate since getting more settled when they are out in public and very attentive in the bedroom. They slept in on saturday morning before we went on vacation and after getting packed and ready to go they said their goodbye's. We were off for a great week just D and I and had a nice relaxing vacation that included lots of fun touring, great food and great sex together. While we did not want to come back until sunday J and D missed eachother so we came home 1 day early on this last saturday. We had "talked" by text and a couple of phone calls to arrange for J to be home saturday evening when we came into town so that D and J could go on a nice date and then have the house to themselves for the night. I have to say D was all smiles around J who didn't understand it was just the 2 of them on the date ( guess we just said go out and he thought it was the 3 of us). Anyway off they went, D said they had a great dinner then to a local event for a while. I made myself scarce for the night giving them the night for whatever. D said they cuddled up for a bit but soon were off to bed for a "great night" so she says making love and then cuddle time with some serious chat about making this a perminant thing. J is all for it although still grasping the whole poly thing....lol. D and I had talked about her and J going for a whole weekend somewhere and he is all for it as well so looks like that will happen in the near future. I still sometimes have a hard time with the whole attention and jelious monster but deal with it very well. 99% of the time I am both happy for D and find the whole thing hot but have had to admit it is hard that small part of the time although even that is going away as D is very supportive of my feelings and I am supportive of both hers and J's so I would say all is well in our poly life at the moment.....more in the future.
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  #19  
Old 08-21-2013, 02:09 AM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is offline
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Thanks for the update!

It's good to read about another successful MFM Vee. I remember being on tenterhooks for the first 6 months or so (I am the hinge) - and wondering if I was doing "okay" meeting everyone else's needs. It was a bit nerve-wracking - but the boys were so good about talking things out that I was able to calm down and really appreciate the "new normal." An important step for me was really internalizing "fair" =/= "equal" - that it is important for each individual to get what they need and that is not necessarily the same for each person. (Dude needs more cuddles and physical affection, MrS needs more quality conversations and non-physical intimacy.)

We all live together full-time - and have since the inception of our Vee (which is often frowned upon here - but worked for us). Actually, since I am the only one who works outside the house, the boys see more of each other than I do of either of them. So, I think our situation is working so well because they where already best friends before the Vee coalesced. They really care about each other (in a platonic way) and want each member of the Vee to be happy and fulfilled.

I have yet to have a weekend "away" with Dude - this is mainly because I am such a "home-body". Although we have had some days/weekends/longer "home" alone together, and have had vacations "away" with all three of us. (And ... I am planning on taking him away for a surprise weekend as a present when he finishes a long-term project he has been working on for me - MrS is fully supportive of this ...Shhhh - don't tell)

Oh - I didn't mean for this to turn out so long. Just wanted to say thanks for the update and that I am so excited for all of you - sounds like you are doing just fine!

JaneQ

PS. If I recall correctly, your wife doesn't post here? If she ever wants another "hinge" to talk to - feel free to PM me and I can share an email address.
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Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" Vee-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (21+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (3+ yrs) and MrS's best friend
Lotus: poly bi female, "it's complicated" relationships with Dude/JaneQ/MrS (1+ years)
TT: poly male, married to Lotus, FB with JaneQ
VV and MsJ: bi-women with male primaries, LTR LDR FWBs to JaneQ


My poly blogs here:
The Journey of JaneQSmythe
The Notebook of JaneQSmythe
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  #20  
Old 08-21-2013, 02:28 AM
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idealist idealist is offline
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Thanks for sharing sterling! Just wanted to let you know that I am following your blog!
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