So NEW and need advice!

[UntamedHottie]

sighs how do I make myself more clearer...he is the one that says when where and how for everything we do, like a boss...only thing he dont tell me how to do is my job at work as we both do the same thing and when we work its strictly professional.

Yes he is also the master in the bedroom in the sexual roleplay terminology. But that really is none of anyones business...I got carried away with typing. Hard going from a quiet girl to talk about ANYTHING.... ~blushes~

[MindfulAgony]

Untamed, it IS important whether or not you have a Master slave relationship to the type of advice we give you. People keep asking - you keep insinuating it's not our business. Well, yes and no.

If you are engaged in power exchange, your Master may view the denial that's concerning you as part of the power play. If it is, the advice may shift to being a bit more specific about the boundaries of those power dynamics.

Overall, it seems that you're basically ready to accept the terms he's laid out for you, even if grudgingly so. I've never been involved in power exchange play, so I can't speak to how bdsm in the bedroom spills over into daily decision making. Maybe others can have advice for you.

I would have been pretty clear by now what I was willing to accept and not. And, walked away if he couldn't accomodate my basic needs of fairness and courtesy (that you've expressed in your several posts).

Simple advice - separate your needs from you wants. Your needs form your boundaries and negotiate around your wants. Be willing to kiss and say goodbye when your needs can't be met.

I don't know what else would be helpful.

[Somegeezer]

You're saying he is your Master, but in a tone which separates it from BDSM. It really does sound like you're just using sarcasm. Badly at that. If you're talking actual M/s relationship, then isn't the point that you accept it or leave the relationship? I don't see how it is anything you can really complain about. You must have known what you were getting into.

However, if it is just him trying to control everything to suit him, he's just being selfish and I personally would make sure he knew exactly where I stood and exactly what I expect to happen. If it couldn't, I'd leave. Easy as.

[nycindie]

Originally Posted by UntamedHottie

Yes he is also the master in the bedroom in the sexual roleplay terminology. But that really is none of anyones business . . . ~blushes~

If you read some more at this forum, you will see that frank discussion of people's sex lives is quite a substantial part of the sharing that takes place here. We're all anonymous and it is quite refreshing to have such a venue to discuss sex and get clarity on the role it plays in one's life. No one is asking about your situation for their own prurient interest. It is simply that many folks here are very knowledgeable about "alternative" lifestyles such as BDSM or whatever other sexual relationship dynamics there are out there. I learn every time I come here, and it's had a great effect on my sex life. Having a clear picture of what you are into simply allows other participants here to give you more helpful answers. So, no need to blush.

[NeonKaos]

Join a forum where the point IS to discuss very personal issues, start a thread about yourself, and then tell everyone that your life is none of anyone's business. No problem.

Kind of defeats the purpose of it all, you know?

Maybe you'd be better off just lurking. We can handle that.

[UntamedHottie]

I didnt come on here to discuss my sex life....sex is beautiful thing and I love it, just not getting enough....I came on here to find out how one allows the one you totally love to go off with another and do the same thing he does to you. When Im with him its all wonderful, he makes me feel like a queen but when he is away from me I feel like Im being treated with crap and ignored....

[NeonKaos]

Originally Posted by UntamedHottie

I didnt come on here to discuss my sex life....sex is beautiful thing and I love it, just not getting enough....I came on here to find out how one allows the one you totally love to go off with another and do the same thing he does to you. When Im with him its all wonderful, he makes me feel like a queen but when he is away from me I feel like Im being treated with crap and ignored....

What DO you expect from him when he is "away" from you? Do you expect him to be texting you every five minutes just so you don't "feel treated like crap and ignored"?

I would suggest that when he's away from you, you find something else worthwhile to occupy your mind so that your imagination stops running wild with counter-productive thoughts.

You knew he was non-monogamous when you fell for him, did you not?

[UntamedHottie]

LMFAO no I dont expect him to be text me every 5 mins...he has enough text going on with his others LOL. Plus we dont text each others unless he is telling me he is on his way here or made it home.

When I met him all I knew he was married.....he did not tell me he was seeing others till after I told him I was in love with him.....I believe it was two days after I said it. I felt really hurt, angry and my heart had been ripped out and shoved in a blender.

[NeonKaos]

Originally Posted by UntamedHottie

When I met him all I knew he was married.....he did not tell me he was seeing others till after I told him I was in love with him.....I believe it was two days after I said it. I felt really hurt, angry and my heart had been ripped out and shoved in a blender.

Yeah, that does sound shitty. Can't help you with that

[UntamedHottie]

Yeah it totally was shitty..