BelleInconnue
New member
Hiya,
I'm new here and relatively new to poly. I'm a female who has been in a poly "V" triad relationship with a man who is married with 2 school age children (under the age of 10). This is my first experience in a poly relationship. His wife and I are on very friendly terms and get along well. I've been with him for about a year. We live separately and I am fine with that. However, what I have been feeling increasingly sad about is the fact that we are in the closet to everyone except 2 or 3 family members on each side. Now I understand the need to be closeted because her family would probably want to kill him if they knew he had another relationship and of course society in general doesn't approve of this type of arrangement. I thought it was fine to be in the closet for very valid reasons, yet I can't help feeling sad that everything has to be so secretive. I sometimes feel resentful that he and his wife have other couples who are friends they can do things with and are out there as a couple for all to see but he and I have to sneak around like we are doing something wrong. I love him very much but have been having trouble dealing with this aspect of it lately and wondering if I will be satisfied with doing this forever. It's primarily her family we are concerned about; otherwise, he says he wouldn't care what anyone else would think. Any advice from people who have experienced this? Thanks.
I'm new here and relatively new to poly. I'm a female who has been in a poly "V" triad relationship with a man who is married with 2 school age children (under the age of 10). This is my first experience in a poly relationship. His wife and I are on very friendly terms and get along well. I've been with him for about a year. We live separately and I am fine with that. However, what I have been feeling increasingly sad about is the fact that we are in the closet to everyone except 2 or 3 family members on each side. Now I understand the need to be closeted because her family would probably want to kill him if they knew he had another relationship and of course society in general doesn't approve of this type of arrangement. I thought it was fine to be in the closet for very valid reasons, yet I can't help feeling sad that everything has to be so secretive. I sometimes feel resentful that he and his wife have other couples who are friends they can do things with and are out there as a couple for all to see but he and I have to sneak around like we are doing something wrong. I love him very much but have been having trouble dealing with this aspect of it lately and wondering if I will be satisfied with doing this forever. It's primarily her family we are concerned about; otherwise, he says he wouldn't care what anyone else would think. Any advice from people who have experienced this? Thanks.