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  #11  
Old 03-25-2013, 07:41 PM
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SweetSensations SweetSensations is offline
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Default The letter to MM

Here is my letter to MM

"My Dearest MM, I did have sex with **** and I really ashamed to inform you that I lost my head and did not use a condom. I am horrified and can't believe after being so responsible I screwed up that bad and now I have to get re-tested for STD's. He was originally tested yes and has to have paperwork on file with the hospitals, but none of that matters at this point. I am so sorry I have disappointed you and I can't begin to imagine what you feel inside. I don't even know what to say to you because I don't want to anger or hurt you. All I can do is correct my behavior and be responsible in the future if there is one. If you do get angry and disappointed I understand and don't blame you. I would love to say there is an excuse for my behavior, but there is none.
I really feel bummed and needed to apologize for my negligence. I will take steps to correct my behavior if you will allow me to. I hope is that you will forgive me in time. I know it is rather impersonal to write you rather than wait for your call, but I was told to go ahead and write you immediately.

I know might you think John is partially to blame because this is a joint responsibility. But I'm not blaming him. Condoms were my commitment to you and to myself. I take full responsibility for my actions."
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  #12  
Old 03-25-2013, 08:31 PM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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In answer to the question-no. But i would stop having sex with them until I felt the appropriate steps to regain trust and assess sti risk were taken.
Could be a year or forever depending on THEIR choices.

As to lying-always wrong. No excuses.
If i found out they lied to me about it-I would leave period. No exceptions.

Lying is a guaranteed termination of relationship. Thats not a mistake. Thats a conscious choice to disrespect and dishonor me.
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  #13  
Old 03-25-2013, 09:28 PM
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SweetSensations SweetSensations is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingRadiance View Post
In answer to the question-no. But i would stop having sex with them until I felt the appropriate steps to regain trust and assess sti risk were taken.
Could be a year or forever depending on THEIR choices.

As to lying-always wrong. No excuses.
If i found out they lied to me about it-I would leave period. No exceptions.

Lying is a guaranteed termination of relationship. Thats not a mistake. Thats a conscious choice to disrespect and dishonor me.
This is what I was having a challenge with. I did not want to tell him this. Any thing else but the insanity of the heat of the moment. I was told to make sure I left those details out of the conversation.
"He asked, do you want me inside? All I could think was please oh god yessss, please stick it in. Now I gotta tell MM that I was irresponsible and need to wait 3 wks to get STD tested. I just can't believe I made a conscious decision to do that and , I wasn't thinking condom, I was thinking fellatio oil on penis.
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  #14  
Old 03-26-2013, 12:59 AM
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SweetSensations SweetSensations is offline
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Default Still unclear

He was very nice kind of silent at times. Then he would perk up and joke around. He said "you can't help it, you are just a horny little girl" and then started laughing. I thought huh? I thanked him for being kind and making a joke out of it.

I said so does this mean I am not gonna get a spanking or am I going to get a harder spanking? He said, "no more spankings for you". He said "I want all of the details." I said no baby I can't. He said "I want to know all of the dirty details". I laughed nervously. Then he started asking questions. Which hotel? Did you perform fellatio? What was it just the heat of the moment? Why did you not have him wear a condom because you have plenty of condoms! Did he make you cum? I started answering his questions with as little detail as I could get away with. Then he thanked me for telling him and said I didn't have to confess to what I had done. I said "do I get to see you tomorrow? There was this pregnant pause...He said in his Southern accent, "well I don't know what we could do;". Tears came to my eyes my voice dropped and I said ok Daddy. Then his phone rang and he said I gotta get this, he has already called twice. I will call ya back.
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  #15  
Old 03-26-2013, 03:22 AM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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You told and got over the main bump in the road. He thanked you for the info.

Now you are planning your next get together.

It will be ok.

Hang in there!
GG
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  #16  
Old 03-26-2013, 03:28 AM
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SweetSensations SweetSensations is offline
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Thanks for the encouragement GalaGirl. I am very appreciative. ((hug))
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  #17  
Old 03-26-2013, 01:36 PM
Tonberry Tonberry is offline
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It will be okay You guys will figure it out and at worst you'll wait until the test results are back to have unprotected sex with him again.
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  #18  
Old 03-26-2013, 04:02 PM
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SweetSensations SweetSensations is offline
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Default Thanks Tom

I should be fine in the long run not right now. He said he doesn't want to see me today. He said you want to shag me so close to shagging him? I feel rejected.

I do have a slight glimmer of hope. I tend to spend well over an hour with fellatio alone, then riding him, then massage, so I would say way more than 75% of my time is focused on him. He may lose his acct here but I doubt it he would completely drop me. He is a self claimed germophobic so I am sure the thought of sex unprotected flips him out.

I found it had more to do with sharing with another man that hurt him so much even with all the talks about it. Actually following through was different for him.
C'est la vie, one way or another I will be fine.

Thanks everyone for your help.
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