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Old 03-26-2013, 12:46 AM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
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Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
Doesn't sound like much fun and i'd probably still leave once i realized you're not really into it. But if you are such a wonderful person that we want to be together, we'll be together no matter how many hobbies or activities we do separately.
In my world, that is one of the fundamental building blocks of a healthy association; appreciating what someone has to offer and not expecting people to fit neatly into the molds we have constructed for them.

Someone pretending to enjoy something just to stay around someone else is just kind of gross. CV recently had a relationship with a girl "L" who demonstrated this to him. CV is a golfer, it's a big part of his life. He knew L for years as friends and she was never interested in his golfing addiction. Once they started dating romantically she instantly became interested in golf so that she could have conversations with him on the topic. As far as he could tell she never had any interest, it seemed that she was just going through the motions... because she needed to do what he was doing to keep him around.

It turns out she was exactly wrong, unfortunately for her. CV liked her when they were friends because she was an independent person complete with her own life and interests. When they became romantically involved she suddenly became a barnacle (his words) and was no longer a person, but an appendage.

Don't be a barnacle.
Me: male, 43, straight, non-hierarchical, independent
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Old 03-26-2013, 11:33 PM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
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Location: Yelm, Washington
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"Don't be a barnacle."
Heh, well-said.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
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