Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Dating & Friendships > North America

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #11  
Old 03-14-2013, 06:31 PM
WaywardDruid's Avatar
WaywardDruid WaywardDruid is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Central California
Posts: 277
Smile Yep....



Careful what you wish for...

Just Me,
Tim
__________________
Round & round the circle goes.
We seek the ones who will share in love.
In our dreams the answers come.
Round & round the circle goes.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 03-14-2013, 06:31 PM
50ShadesOfRed 50ShadesOfRed is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Seattle, Wa
Posts: 9
Default

Lmao!

I didn't meet my couple because of ad or anything. We just kind of ran into each other at fetish party once, started discussing interests, and here we are.

I don't believe I've ever met anyone who has a success story resulting from running an ad.

Last edited by 50ShadesOfRed; 03-14-2013 at 06:39 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 03-14-2013, 09:33 PM
Natja's Avatar
Natja Natja is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 823
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by 50ShadesOfRed View Post

I don't believe I've ever met anyone who has a success story resulting from running an ad.
Me either.
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 03-14-2013, 10:11 PM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,130
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by 50ShadesOfRed View Post
This almost perfectly describes the relationship I'm currently in.
We exist...but we don't stay single long.
Would you be willing to describe your relationship? Specifically, which part of "almost" is not included?

The reason is that I basically don't believe you, no offence. Obviously I'm just some chick on the internet and you have nothing to prove to me. But I simply can't fathom how someone could be in a relationship and willingly give up any and all say in how they fit into that relationship. And yet, you're claiming that this is what you are doing (unless that's the part excluded by "almost.")

Your nickname and presence at a fetish party imply you're into BDSM, it's possible that you're their submissive. So perhaps you've consciously and willingly given up your say in how you fit in the relationship, decided to put their needs above your own because they're your Masters, and allow your sexuality to be restricted.

Hmm... So I guess that would mean that unicorns do exist, but they're all 24/7 submissives. Yet even then, all the [emotionally stable] submissives I've ever met do have an open dialogue with their Dominants regarding their personal growth, limits, and boundaries.
__________________
Gralson: my husband (works out of town).
Auto: my girlfriend (lives with her husband Zoffee).

The most dangerous phrase in the English language is "we've always done it this way."
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 03-14-2013, 10:14 PM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,130
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by hyperskeptic View Post
Here's one. My wife and I started out our great poly adventure dating independently of one another, and we continue that way. I'm not sure either of us would be especially interested in or comfortable with a unicorn, the way such creatures are usually described ("add someone special", etc. >gag!<)

At least, if we ever did come across a unicorn, we'd want to make darned sure - as I read somewhere once - it's not just a donkey with a plunger on its head.
Just to reiterate, unicorn does not mean just anyone who would join a triad with you and your wife. More than anything, it refers more to the hunters than the unicorns. In order for a unicorn to fall into your lap, you would have to be a unicorn hunter. That is, you would have to be planning to put limits on your girlfriend's life and potential relationships, dictate the boundaries of your relationship to her rather than discuss or negotiate them, and require that she basically be your sex slave. Someone like that cannot fall into your lap unless you go out with those expectations.
__________________
Gralson: my husband (works out of town).
Auto: my girlfriend (lives with her husband Zoffee).

The most dangerous phrase in the English language is "we've always done it this way."
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 03-14-2013, 10:22 PM
Natja's Avatar
Natja Natja is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 823
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post

Your nickname and presence at a fetish party imply you're into BDSM, it's possible that you're their submissive. So perhaps you've consciously and willingly given up your say in how you fit in the relationship, decided to put their needs above your own because they're your Masters, and allow your sexuality to be restricted.
I saw exactly this relationship offered up by a couple just a few weeks ago, they were very blatant about it and it's freaking me out because I am beginning to wonder if they are the inspiration for this trope.....
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old 03-14-2013, 10:35 PM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,130
Default

Do you mean they offered up a "give up your freedom" relationship and you agreed, and now it's freaking you out? Or is this a different couple than the one you're with?

I mean... I understand BDSM well enough to know there actually ARE people who enter relationships with the understanding of giving up any and all freedoms and opinions in the relationship, and their joy and fulfillment comes from serving and pleasing their Master(s). I just don't see that as Unicorns and Unicorn Hunters. It's BDSM. It's Master/slave, not Hunter/Unicorn. If you told your average Unicorn Hunter couple that what they want is part of this kinky fetish stuff that's also associated with things like leather, whips, and chains... they would be all like "WHAT?!? NO! THAT'S NOT WHAT WE MEAN!!" with a big indignant "How dare you?!"

The Unicorn Hunter will try to pretend that they're looking for an "equal" to "join" their relationship, not a submissive over which to Dominate.
__________________
Gralson: my husband (works out of town).
Auto: my girlfriend (lives with her husband Zoffee).

The most dangerous phrase in the English language is "we've always done it this way."
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 03-14-2013, 10:39 PM
Natja's Avatar
Natja Natja is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 823
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
Do you mean they offered up a "give up your freedom" relationship and you agreed, and now it's freaking you out? Or is this a different couple than the one you're with?

No, they have nothing to do with me, it was an add that asked that the woman be their third, live with them, do as they say, remember that they come first, always etc...it was pretty awful, they were in the BDSM scene but even so, I still couldn't imagine many women going for it.

Sadly, I can't find their ad any more but I am pretty sure it was worse than I am describing.
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 03-14-2013, 11:14 PM
SchrodingersCat's Avatar
SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 2,130
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Natja View Post
No, they have nothing to do with me, it was an add that asked that the woman be their third, live with them, do as they say, remember that they come first, always etc...it was pretty awful, they were in the BDSM scene but even so, I still couldn't imagine many women going for it.
They would have to have a pretty nice house...

Or she would have to be from a pretty awful country, and looking for ANY way to get out. I mean, sure that sounds like a terrible living arrangement for anyone. But seriously, compared life in Dadaab refugee camp? It's a picnic.
__________________
Gralson: my husband (works out of town).
Auto: my girlfriend (lives with her husband Zoffee).

The most dangerous phrase in the English language is "we've always done it this way."
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 03-15-2013, 03:09 AM
50ShadesOfRed 50ShadesOfRed is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Seattle, Wa
Posts: 9
Default

I don't expect you to believe me. I don't blame you for not believing me, either.

I posted an introduction. I stated that, yes, I am their submissive. I am allowed to date putside of the relationship, but potential partners are to be approved by my Dominants. Also, I wouldn't be having sex with any of my secondaries. Maybe that disqualifies me as a unicorn. *shrugs*

I guess I need to go find a plunger now.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
hot bi babe, seattle, unicorn

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 05:54 PM.