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  #11  
Old 01-30-2013, 03:09 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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I prefer style over fashion, and I have an absolute disdain for the fashion industry, but I love Project Runway - basically for me it's all about the creativity. I don't think of myself as straight-placed, but others probably see me that way. At heart, I am a Bohemian.

I would say that the stereotypes you've heard about people who practice polyamory are quite inaccurate because they're likely based on a very narrow slice of the general population. Poly isn't that weird - it's just a simple thing, really.

Nobody needs to be weird to manage having more than one love relationship. People have been doing it for centuries and considered quite normal - only it was cheating, not poly. All polyamorists do is lift the veil of deception and accept/embrace what's going on.
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  #12  
Old 01-30-2013, 03:42 AM
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It occurs to me that the stereotype probably exists because it's the people who are already seen as weird who are the most upfront about being poly, because they have nothing to lose, and it's the people who have the most invested in seeming "normal" who are the most guarded about being poly.
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Last edited by AnnabelMore; 01-30-2013 at 03:45 AM.
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  #13  
Old 01-30-2013, 04:41 AM
Octopus Octopus is offline
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Also, the 'weirdos' - please note the quotation marks! - (kinks and queers and members of certain subcultures) may simply be exposed to the concept of polyamory earlier than those who are otherwise part of more heteronormative, 'normal' - again quotation marks! - social circles; thus finding ground to identify on or maybe having access to resources earlier.
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  #14  
Old 01-31-2013, 10:56 AM
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Helo Helo is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by threesnocrowd View Post
Hey Guys,

We have been on here for a while and we are wondering if there are other professional, fashion-loving, "straight-laced" folks on here. The stereotype is that poly folks are goth or a little odd. That's what we hear anyway. I'm sure there are all types out there, from the gamers, to the nerdoids and dweebs, to the suburban soccer moms and dads.

Can you describe your "style" if you have one.

We are just curious.

We will start. We are both professionals. Love nice clothes and foods. And look very "normal" if you saw us on the street.

What about you guys?

PS No offense is meant by this question. Sorry if any is taken.
I dont think I've ever looked "normal" a day in my life, if you saw me walking down the street you'd notice me; I'm six feet with long red hair (usually in a ponytail) and I usually wear a thick leather (welding) jacket with marker on it over a t-shirt (usually a black punk band shirt) with dark jeans and my workboots or sandals with a keffiyeh around my neck. I'm...difficult to miss.

I look slightly less barbaric in my work clothes; a tight button up with sleeves rolled up to my elbow. I just tend to look like a bouncer.

I wouldn't call myself "goth," I just look better in darker colors. I freely admit I have less than zero fashion sense and the world of fashion actively nauseates me. I tend to wear what I want where I want and have very little interest in following arbitrary rules as to how I should look. Most of my clothing is purchased at Goodwill so my style options are a bit limited.
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Last edited by Helo; 01-31-2013 at 10:59 AM.
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  #15  
Old 01-31-2013, 06:06 PM
Razorbacktat Razorbacktat is offline
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I am a suit wearing profesional who wears torn jeans and fasionable clothing away from the office, H is a stay at home mom and my bookeeper so you would catch her in anything from jeans and high heels to work out clothes to a dress, K is in the medical profession and you will see her in scrubs or in jeans and a tshirt unless we decide to dress up and then she will put on a dress but usually not the high heel type.

We fit in our uppermiddle class lifestyle very well. We are not wierd to us, just different. We have a few friends that know about our poly lifestyle but to most we are all just good friends who spend alot of time together.

I definately dont think Poly people look some certian way, I do find them to be well read open minded people who fit in most anywhere.
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  #16  
Old 01-31-2013, 08:48 PM
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I think a lot of it is how you present yourself. On the internet especially, there is a bit more anonymity so you can get away with playing up parts of yourself that you don't as much in life. If that makes sense.

On paper, we are probably so normal a family it's not even funny! I'm a stay at home mom, we have three kids, been married 18 years as of next week. He's been military and works for the government. We were married two years before we had children, I only worked outside of the house where either kids came with me, vet tech, or while hubby was then the stay at home parent. We have always been a 'nuclear family'. No step parents, half siblings, pretty boring really. Hubby is into computers, I write or do graphics. We play family games and watch family movies. We introduce our kids to classical literature as well as classic movies, yes they know who Ethel Merman and Fred Astaire are!


Now, beyond that? They've been to camps where it was clothing optional and pagan. They've been to churches of just about every kind and to pow wows and learned to make dream catchers and make their own essential oils. We've camped in areas that are considered 'queer community' and have always been around transexuals, gay, lesbian, role players of the geek and freak type. I've dyed my hair all colors of the rainbow and dressed goth for going to goth clubs, and have piercings and tattoos. Kids now have blue and purple and pink hair. Are interested in anime (not cartoons), baking, fashion design, theater, queer community. Yet, all of this is 'normal' for us!
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  #17  
Old 01-31-2013, 09:22 PM
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Moonlight has a prestigious position in city government. Fly is a high-level manager in an artisan bakery. I'm the director of a child care center, and I also teach in the preschool. Other than the fact that Fly and I are true Seattlites and not particularly fashionable, we're sort of disappointingly normal. I actually looked "edgier" when I was a virgin who had never heard of polyamory - eyebrow and tongue piercings, hair all colors of the rainbow, that sort of thing.

Although, Fly and I often burst out into show tunes together, and Kiddo has been heard singing "Dancing Queen" in the shower. We've taken the kid to antiwar protests, and we have solar panels on our roof and a halfway built chicken coop in the back yard. Food politics are something we frequently discuss around the dinner table. We also travel a lot internationally and are conscientious about being world citizens, not just Americans. We're a little artsy, a little hippie-ish, a little bit out of the mainstream, but you wouldn't realize that until you got to know us.

Moonlight is utterly conventional until you get her to talk about her hippie free love past.
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  #18  
Old 02-01-2013, 06:36 AM
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Business owner and professional, clean cut, gym-nut, beach-goer. You wouldn't think I'm anything out of the ordinary if you saw me on the street.
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  #19  
Old 02-01-2013, 07:15 AM
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Helo Helo is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vixtoria View Post
I think a lot of it is how you present yourself. On the internet especially, there is a bit more anonymity so you can get away with playing up parts of yourself that you don't as much in life. If that makes sense.
Totes. One of the remarks I usually get when I meet people I've talked to online is "Wow, you are SO much less of an asshole in person!"
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I am as direct as a T-Rex with 'roid rage and about as subtle. It isn't intended to cause upset, I just prefer to talk plain. There are plenty of other people here who do the nice, polite thing much better than I can. I'm what you'd call a "problem dinner guest."
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  #20  
Old 02-01-2013, 08:57 AM
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I don't know if anyone would call us "straight laced", lol. We're both still in our 20s though, so maybe it's expected for us to not "fit" a certain mold.
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