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  #71  
Old 09-13-2010, 10:22 PM
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SNeacail SNeacail is offline
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Originally Posted by TeJoKo View Post
I got fitted for a bra thing to go with a bride's maids dress at David's Bridal. It's a strapless bra thing that goes down over the chest and kind of the belly... What are those called? It pushed my boobs up to almost IN my face. They are freaking HUGE in that thing. Anyways, it is 38D. But in most 40D bras I use the middle of the 3 hooks, and when it gets old and stretched I use the tighter hook.
I think it's called a Marry Widow. If you could get into a 38 one of those, I would seriously start looking at 36-38s and upping your cup size. I had to go up a size when I got one.

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Originally Posted by TeJoKo View Post
Where can I go to get a proper fitting? And, how can they properly fit me when I am either wearing a bra or my boobs aren't even in the shape or general area they will be in in a bra?
I can't buy a bra online without being able to feel it, try it on, and know it has no padding. (I have NO idea why they make large size bras with padding. I want mine smaller, not bigger!)
Google or check the Yellowpages for bra specialty stores, Seattle is probably your best bet. Call them up and ask them if they do bra fittings and what is the largest size they carry. Most good specialty stores will carry the larger sizes like G or H. Not that you need that size, but it does give an indication if they are just trying to sell pretty stuff or if they truely want to sell you what fits.

I only buy online if I have already owned the exact bra. I'm just as baffled about why they pad the larger sizes. REALLY?

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Originally Posted by TeJoKo View Post
I grew up in a small town in the mountains of Washington state and the women still didn't generally do that stuff.
My mom grew up in Republic, then Kelso and my grandmother grew up in Orondo and they both loved to go camping.

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Originally Posted by TeJoKo View Post
How the hell do you meet people? Seriously? Everyone goes about their busy lives, barely acknowledging that other humans exist. Also, how am I supposed to know at all if they are someone worth trying to get to know? Polyamory isn't the only controversial thing that goes on in my home or that I believe in.
To meet people you actually have to go out and participate with people that have interests similar to yours Good place to start is to take a class. Sometimes, just being able to get out and do that stuff is worth putting up with people you don't quite connect with. You may eventually get introduced to people you do conect with. A group campout is usually nothing more than everyone camping in the same general area, not necessarily with arranged "group" activities/tours. I hate those too. If all else fails, go by yourself, that can be fun too.

The internet works too.

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Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
What! You don't wear a bikini or a corset when you have fire arm practice! Damn! I'm canadian, what do I know... :P
OOOh a corset when shooting, my husband would like that (especailly when we are out in the desert with no one else around). Leathers are a popular choice.

Last edited by SNeacail; 09-13-2010 at 10:24 PM.
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  #72  
Old 09-13-2010, 10:37 PM
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Default TeJoKo-please read this... at least the second red part

[QUOTE=SNeacail;43903]
Quote:
I too always hated the smell and wetness.
I actually STILL DO hate the smell at certain times of the month. Enough so that I will complain endlessly for that week (it's not DURING my period-but that sucks too). I don't think that there is anything wrong with disliking parts of yourself so long as you don't identify who you are with those parts. Does that make sense?

Quote:
If I was getting cronic infections, I think I would insist my partners shower first also.
I don't get chronic infections (thank God) BUT I DO still insist that my partners shower first, simply becuase I don't like dirty. Dirty me, dirty him, doesn't matter. There are times that isn't true-camping. I'll babywipe it. But, if we're at home-the shower works-use it!
Maca knows that one of the key reasons I was willing to marry him (seriously) is that he showers before bed every night. It really moved me that he cared enough about it to do that without me asking.

Quote:
I have one friend from high school that I still talk to on a regular basis. She is probably the only female friend I have that I can truely tell her anything.
Ditto. I refer to her as my sister. That's the bond we share, but we're not biologically sisters. She's more my sister than friend though. She's my kids "auntie".
I have other female friends-but NONE is as close as her and none from pre-adulthood.

Quote:
But we can get into personal details and not judge one another. I think I have better friends online than I do in real life. For some reason, I just can't get close to most women.
Yep. This ability to not judge is one of the criteria I have for ANY friendship now. If I can't be REAL with someone-I don't want to be "friends" because to me, the "friendship" is all based on a lie...

Quote:
I find it easier to talk to men, usually because I am more interested in the stuff they enjoy than other women or maybe they aren't as threatening.
My best friend has been a man for almost all of my life. The only time that would be untrue is during middle school. BUT-just because I GENERALLY find men easier to talk to does'nt mean ALL women are that way. The women friends I have-are like me, they have mostly men as friends.

Quote:
Right there with you on the big boobs thing. Kids in school were cruel and up until after I had my 2nd baby, I hate them. I have now made my peace and stop fighting them. Nothing makes me feel more feminie than a new bra that FITS. Real tough to find, even here in the Los Angeles area and they are usually $50+. I actually found 1 company that makes an underwire sports bra in my size, I was in heaven, I could live in that bra.
I'm 5 foot 8 inches tall.
I was a 32D in school before having my first child (130lbs).
A 34DDD for years after that. (135lbs)
After my second child (25 years old) I stayed at 26FF. (175-200lbs)

After my 3rd child (she's 3 now) I breastfed for a year due to her health issues and I was a 34 J. (175lbs)

After I stopped breastfeeding I stuck right at 34G for a LONG time. (175lbs)

By this January I had emergency surgery for the herniated disk in my neck and the surgeon fought with my insurance for a breast reduction because he said there was no way that the weight of my "pendulous breasts" (his words) could NOT be a SIGNIFICANT factor in my neck problems.

In March I had a breast reduction, before surgery I was 160lbs and still 34G.

Now I'm a 32B/C (depends on the bra style) and 147lbs.

I CONCUR COMPLETELY that large breasts are ASININE and a PAIN IN THE EVERYTHING!
I am SO not concerned with "looks" but the sheer amount of pain that disappeared when I had them removed is SO worth the reduction.

The cost of bras. (I can't ROLL MY EYES big enough) I was paying well over $75 per bra to wear a bra that didn't fit properly, for so many years I quit caring to TRY and find a bra that DID fit.

I did find a sports bra made by New Balance that was AWESOME a year or so ago. If you are stuck wearing bras for large breasts-I highly recommend checking that out. I'll see if I can find a link and post it on my blog later...

[QUOTE=TeJoKo;43907]
Quote:
If I don't wear panties, I am even MORE likely to get a yeast infection. Occasionally I will choose not to wear them to bed and half the time I wake up wet, itchy, and with yeast.
I think the more you say the more it sounds like you really may be struggling with a medical issue in regards to the yeast.
My sister is heavy, and has very large breasts. She's suffering badly right now from yeast infection on her skin underneath. It looks like red patchy (itchy) spots. But it's yeast.
Also, GG suffered from patchy red spots that itched on his back and shoulders for years, I got tired of him complaining. After we started dating "officially" I insisted that he go to the Dr about it-it was a yeast infection of the skin.
Athlete's foot-yeast infection of the skin. Our 14 year old has issues with this and then due to him showering in the same tub as the 3 year old-she ended up with yeast issues on her but and thighs (from sitting in the tub where he showered).

One MAJOR culprit that people don't always realize is the use of anti-bacterial soap. If you KNOW you have issues with yeast-do NOT use anti-bacterial soap and insist that your partners don't either. There are lots of soaps out there that aren't anti-bacterial.

That was what GG had to do. He was all about "anti bacterial" everything. The Dr. point blank told him that if he didn't like having itchy red skin from yeast infections he was going to have to get over that issue because that was the reason he was endlessly having that problem.

Quote:
I skimmed through your reply and I feel like reading it and replying, addressing these things again is just going to depress me more.
I already wish I had never replied to the post this was supposed to be part of, and I REALLY wish they hadn't made it its own thread. It feels like I am being put in the spot light for everyone to hate me.
Hate? Honey, maybe you SHOULD have read the rest of my post! Hate is CERTAINLY not what I am feeling towards you AT ALL.
You SERIOUSLY remind me of my daughter (attitude not age)! She's a BEAUTIFUL, INTELLIGENT, BELOVED almost 19 year old. I ADORE her. She's amazing. That was precisely why I felt like I HAD to respond. NOT to interrogate or hurt you AT ALL.


Quote:
Yes, I have unresolved problems, If you would have read through more than the first page you would have seen me admit that.
I did read through the rest of it-I was only noting that I hadn't when I wrote hte FIRST reply. I ALWAYS continue through to the end (not that you would know that-I've been gone for months-but I assure you, I would never comment and "walk away". It's just that I have found if I try to read ALL of it and post my thoughts all at once, I get SO LOST and confused I can't write a sensible thing to save my life!!! (seriously).
If you would be so kind, I can see you are feeling defensive and hurt, but if you would be so kind as to take the time to finish reading what I wrote-I think you will find that we see much more eye to eye than you percieved in your defensiveness.

My overwhelming reaction (and I spent all weekend talking to my sister about you in fact) was a deep wish that I could invite you up here for a visit-because I really felt that somehow you had missed out on the opportunity to meet REAL women. My reaction was NOT one of "wow what a psycho" which is what you seem to think I felt.


Quote:
Young? That depends on your perspective. I have been having periods for half my life, have had boobs for a bit more than that.
If this is in response to my question/comment-yes I wondered if you were young, because my daughter (and I-and now I can my sister too) felt many of the same things you were stating you feel. My daughter still does. But as time went on, my sister and I made peace with much of it. I was wondering if you were young, because time alone often helps us as people learn to accept things that seem difficult and frustrating (fyi-big boobs is NOT one of those things I think!)

Quote:
I don't know or meet women at all... And the reason I bring up bi women is because this was supposed to be a REPLY to a thread about poly bi women. It's pretty messed up that it was made its own post without me having any ability to edit the title or anything. I wasn't even given a choice.
That-the fact that you don't meet women-that is one of the resounding things I picked up on in your posts and I just kept thinking-MAN I SURE WISH I COULD JUST INVITE HER TO COME VISIT! I bet she'd be THRILLED and really enjoy the experience.
I can't say much in regards to the editing etc-that's a moderator thing (which I'm not) but I think maybe if you just finish reading you will see that in fact the majority of replies are not at all intended to hurt or judge you, but to identify with some of your feelings and offer suggestions to possibly make you feel better.

Quote:
I didn't read the rest of your post. I am not into defending myself right now. Maybe later, if I feel like hating myself and crying some more.
It's later-but please don't DEFEND yourself, because I am not in any way trying to attack you. If it came across that way-I sincerely apologize. I forget that some of you who joined the board in the last few months-haven't read through old threads and haven't a CLUE who I am or what I'm like. But truly-I'm not a judgemental person at all and I'm sorry if you were hurt and felt as though you needed to defend yourself against my questions and thoughts.
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  #73  
Old 09-13-2010, 10:38 PM
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[QUOTE=Magdlyn;43912]
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I know you're on meds, and seeing a counselor. That's great. I've seen you say here you rarely leave the house, don't work, don't see women friends. I hope as you continue with therapy, you'll get some help with your social anxiety. Lots of people have that, to an extent. It is a debilitating syndrome, and does limits one's ability to enjoy the riches life has to offer.
I concur. I think it's AWESOME that you are seeing a counselor. I've learned SO MUCH about myself, my relationships, my life seeing a counselor.

Quote:
I'm just gonna go back to the yeast thing. Seems to me you have an overgrowth of yeast, and both your men do as well.
I concur. And when that happens IT SUCKS.
I didn't mention above-but my God daughter has an overgrowth of yeast IN her intestines, causes her to be prone to infections AND have HORRIBLE bad breath. They've tried for YEARS to treat her without medication to no avail. Her dad won't agree to allowing the "drugs" (long story not worth getting into) and so she continues to suffer.
It would DEFINITELY be worth it to look into the possibility of this. Just imagine if it did help clear up some of those issues that are making you miserable?

Quote:
When I help women with recurrent yeast infections, I suggest their male partner be treated as well for it, or you just keep passing it back and forth.
ABSOLUTELY!
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  #74  
Old 09-13-2010, 10:47 PM
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[QUOTE=TeJoKo;44177]
Quote:
My nipples sag to my belly button, I just turned 26, no kids. When I lean forward while sitting, they sit in my lap. There is about an inch of space between my boobs and my lap right now.
They say your boobs aren't actually saggy unless your nipples point more down than forward. Mine point straight down. How about yours?
OMG you sound like my sister!
She's had no kids (we're both 35). She was SO frustrated that after my first child mine still "stayed where they belonged" in spite of the size and hers (we weren't even graduated from highschool yet and she wasn't overweight back then) were already "pointing to the ground".
It broke my heart watching her misery.

Quote:
I can't buy a bra online without being able to feel it, try it on, and know it has no padding. (I have NO idea why they make large size bras with padding. I want mine smaller, not bigger!)
I've NEVER purchased a bra online-for the same reason and the padding baffles me too! No one whose ever HAD huge breasts (that I've encountered) wants them to look BIGGER. I've always believed that boobless people created those bras!
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Old 09-13-2010, 11:18 PM
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Default About me- for you TeJoKo :)

I live in Wasilla, Alaska. I've lived in Alaska since I was 3 (32 years).
Until the last couple years when Maca and I started traveling I never realized how much more open-minded and generally accepting people here were compared with people in other parts of the country.
Also-people here tend to "fail" to fit the "stereotypes" for male/female. I presume it's because of the environment. Many people here hunt for their PRIMARY food source, it takes the WHOLE family to make that function-so the men and women are side by side.
Also-being "high maintenance" gets a bit problematic when the weather is stuck at -30F or less for months at a time. It's simply ridiculous to try to dress "sexy" or whatever in that type of weather. Dresses and skirts become something out of movies-because no one wants frostbite.

Hell-most of the women I know have known how to pee standing up, outside in the woods since they were "potty trained" because how the hell else can you pee if you are camping?
Maca and I were STUNNED when we went stateside to see the "campgrounds" that had showers, rv hookups etc. We have rv sites here, but they are generally not in "campgrounds". Our campgrounds are generally dirt roads through the woods that have fire pits every 30 feet or so in the trees and if you are lucky-a wooden picnic table.
But-even those are considered a bit "high maintenance" for camping and generally you find families with children using them.

I never camped in a "campground" until I was married. We always just went out to the woods, hiked or skiid in for a day, set camp whereever we ended up and either hiked/skii'd further the next day and made camp again or hiked/skii'd out.

Can't say much about advertising... as I said, I don't watch or even HAVE tv and I avoid the radio like the plague. I don't even "browse the net" and run across adds. I find advertising WAY to annoying. Hell-even in my moment of "treating myself to an extra" and ordering the magazine "runners" I skip the pages with advertisements. Seriously have NO USE for seeing much less reading or hearing them.

OMG Penis's can be SO disgusting. First of all there is the whole wet dreams thing. I've got teenage boys around and I can assure you that I get REALLY tired of washing their NASTY sheets, blankets, pajamas, underwear and pants! SO GROSS-and I'm not talking "wiping" issues-I'm talking penis dripping issues! Some men that settles down once they get out of puberty and they have good control over their "getting off". Some men, do not.

Furthermore, the pre-cum. OH LORD! There are men I've been sexually active with who drip precum when they see something that they find attractive. So you are walking in the store-and they are dripping in their pants! NICE (not).
Then of course there is the pee dribble. (that grosses me out way more than precum for sure).
Men who precum easily like that-often do get the crusty underwear.

Ironically-last week Maca was commenting about how womens cum doesn't cause that problem, but men's does. I don't remember exactly why he was talking about it-but it just popped in my mind reading your post.
Also-not all women have the issue of getting crusty. (sorry if I sound crude-not sure how else to term it)
I am generally always damp at least and often get wet easily through out the day, but I almost never have that issue with my panties (I don't usually wear panties if I wear pants, but I do if I'm wearing a skirt or dress and when I'm on my period and I used to wear them all of the time).

I wasn't suggesting that you were telling women these feelings you were expressing here. Not at all. BUT-women tend (tend, not always) to be more intuitive than men. They sense something is "off" even when they can't define it. So if you are FEELING those emotions when they meet you-they may be picking up on that. I was being sincere in my suggestion about not judging them. It's NOT always easy to do. I have a HARD TIME with women who are REALLY HIGH MAINTENANCE. Drive me nuts. I've found that no matter how nice I try to be, they can tell somehow that I'm having negative feelings regarding them and they react differently because of it.


The point behind going other places in this case is that you could meet other women more like you and there's no saying it has to be superficial. When I went to Seattle and met RP and Mono-it could have been "just nothing" but in fact it's turned into a friendship between us that is meaningful on all sides (I think)
If you meet people who live in different places, have different experiences and lives, you may find that you meet people that you LIKE BETTER than the people who are near you. You may find that you can make some deep meaningful friendships that weren't available to you where you are from.

Meeting people is very limited if you arent willing/able to talk to strangers. Because of course until you meet them, they are all strangers. The easiest way I've found is simply to go out and particpate in activities that I really like, with other people who really like doing them.
The other thing you might consider is going to someplace like REI and finding out what types of SMALL group activities that they have going on.
Sometimes you'll find that they have a 3-5 person limit to go on a rafting/kayaking/skijoring/mt climbing/biking/etc trip... That would be something where you and your guys could go-and then there would be 1-2 other (potentially new) people as well. Much easier than a group of 10-15 people.

It really depends upon what it is you are interested in doing.

Oh hell-we've got a HUGELY controversial home.
I completely understand that issue!

I don't just jump in both feet to becoming friends with someone new. I take it slow. Some people I meet-and within seconds I know it won't be a good fit, so out of my life they go.
Other people I may consider for longer and still decide that they aren't a good fit.
Then there are those few that I keep for life.
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  #76  
Old 09-13-2010, 11:21 PM
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Bra fittings-in the Seattle area, try Nordstroms.
I avoid the store like the plague-but
my sister swears by them in regards to bra fittings.
She goes there, gets fitted, then goes and buys the bra somewhere more realistic.
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Old 09-13-2010, 11:46 PM
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Here is a link on bra fittings I forgot earlier:
http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-...our-bra-size-2
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Old 09-14-2010, 01:19 AM
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This is the basic style I found that worked.


http://www.shopnewbalance.com/detail...&style=RSB9137
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Old 09-14-2010, 06:12 AM
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ahhhhh, all is right with the world, long posts by LR.... *sigh*

and yes Mono, I meant un-holstered.
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Old 09-14-2010, 07:49 AM
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ahhhhh, all is right with the world, long posts by LR.... *sigh*

and yes Mono, I meant un-holstered.


Glad SOMEONE thinks that makes things right in the world.
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