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Old 08-23-2010, 07:10 PM
Bibliophile Bibliophile is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 6
Default Unicorn! ... Well, almost. Hi!

When I was younger, I didn't realize there was such a thing as polyamory. I just knew that even when I was in a relationship with one person, I'd often find myself developing deep feelings for another person as well. Then would come the guilt, feeling as if I had done something wrong, and debates about what constitutes emotional cheating, even when nothing was done behind my SO's back.

Anyhow. Marriage, divorce, then seven years of being either single or dating, which brings us to the present. A few years ago, a girl I had just met gave me The Ethical Slut, and I had a lightbulb moment. Finally, an explanation! What followed were a couple of monogamous relationships and a couple of Vees (with me as the hinge, and the other two aware of each other but not involved).

So here I am now, single, bisexual, and I'd been having thoughts about maybe joining a couple but had no idea how to go about that. Dating sites seemed more like like hookup centers and not what I was geared towards (preconceived notion, I know). Then, a man I was aquainted with (our respective social circles touch but we're on opposite sides, if that makes sense) started making flirty remarks when we chanced to meet. I wasn't sure what to make of it, as he had a girlfriend already who I also knew. I'd always thought he was a great guy and she was awesome as well, but I was getting an odd vibe from him which I took as him wanting something extracurricular.

D (him) and A (her) had a party and while there, the subject of sexuality came up. It turned out that both of them had been discussing me for a while but didn't know how to broach the subject, especially since they didn't know that I'm poly friendly and bi (I'm not closeted, just rather quiet about things).

Anyhow, it looks like we're going to be spending more time together, to see how things go. Since I've never been in a triad, I thought I'd go ahead and sign up here to get some ideas of how to work things, what pitfalls to avoid, etc. Any advice anyone could give me would be much appreciated.
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  #2  
Old 08-23-2010, 11:04 PM
AutumnalTone AutumnalTone is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Kansas City Metro
Posts: 2,186
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Welcome aboard.
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When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.

While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.
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Old 08-24-2010, 06:39 AM
dragonflysky dragonflysky is offline
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Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 211
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Glad you joined us! Lots of good information and people on this site!
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  #4  
Old 08-24-2010, 03:20 PM
Brunetteangel03 Brunetteangel03 is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Lakewood, WA
Posts: 28
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Welcome! I have also just entered into a Triad relationship. We are all very new to this too. This place has really helped!
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<3 Michelle
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  #5  
Old 08-24-2010, 08:43 PM
Bibliophile Bibliophile is offline
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Thanks for the welcome, and you're right, Brunette. There's a lot of information here; I may be going into data overload, lol. But it's good.
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