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  #341  
Old 10-11-2010, 12:09 AM
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Wow! That is so great to hear! So happy for you guys, to have all come such a long way!

It gives me hope.
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  #342  
Old 10-13-2010, 02:57 PM
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I was at Mono's house last night, my OH (other home). PN called me at about 7 and told me that the boy had cut his head having stood up and hit it on the cupboard door in the kitchen. He was bleeding all over and scared. PN wanted to know what he should do about a bandaid as they wouldn't stick to his hair. I suggested a compress and that he wear his touque to bed for the night to keep it on. I suggested that he talk to Derby as she is a nurse. When I got off the phone I texted Derby and she called PN. She told him to wake him up at 10 to see if he was okay and didn't have a concussion. She agreed that he shouldn't have a shower to wash blood off but should wait until morning and pat it off with a wet cloth.

After the emergency was over I crumbled inside... as I do in emergencies. I had asked over and over if I should come home but PN and the boy kept saying no. I HATE being across the city in these situations. I HATE it. IT tears me up inside and I feel like a horrible mother. Very irresponsible to be away when my boy needs me.

This is one of the reasons that I have been advocating for Mono to move in. In a couple of weeks I will be just downstairs and can come up as soon as something happen. I will feel much better about that.
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Last edited by ImaginaryIllusion; 10-13-2010 at 03:00 PM.
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  #343  
Old 10-13-2010, 03:56 PM
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That is always a hard situation. Don't be too hard on yourself, it happens to all of us. It also gave PN the chance to be the hero to your boy.
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  #344  
Old 10-13-2010, 04:33 PM
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Yowie. I probably would've melted down into a quivering heap (after the crisis was past, of course).
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  #345  
Old 10-13-2010, 05:05 PM
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Originally Posted by SNeacail View Post
That is always a hard situation. Don't be too hard on yourself, it happens to all of us. It also gave PN the chance to be the hero to your boy.
Yes it did. He did a really good job of staying calm and light about the whole thing. Something he has really worked on since we have had a child. He used to freak out and I was the calm one.

Derby rocks my world I must say. I don't talk about her much as we don't get to see each other often, but I have to say that I am a very fortunate woman to have such a woman love me. She is smart, giving, generous, kind, beautiful and fun loving. I just adore her. She was my hero last night. Thanks for coming to the rescue sweets. We all appreciate you
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  #346  
Old 10-13-2010, 05:22 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by redpepper View Post

Derby rocks my world I must say. I don't talk about her much as we don't get to see each other often, but I have to say that I am a very fortunate woman to have such a woman love me. She is smart, giving, generous, kind, beautiful and fun loving. I just adore her. She was my hero last night. Thanks for coming to the rescue sweets. We all appreciate you
Aww thanks How is your boy this morning? I bet he's full of stories to tell his classmates about the blood. (well if he's anything like my boy anyway). I'm glad I could help.
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  #347  
Old 10-13-2010, 09:02 PM
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Aww thanks How is your boy this morning? I bet he's full of stories to tell his classmates about the blood. (well if he's anything like my boy anyway). I'm glad I could help.
He sure does! That and how hilarious it was that he sucked a cloth up in the central vac.
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  #348  
Old 10-14-2010, 07:34 AM
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Had to repost this
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Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
One of the biggest gifts I ever got was from Mono about how he sees my body and sexuality. He told me when I met him, after a long haul of casual sex, swinging and dating many many men that I was a temple to him. That the privileged of being able to put his skin on mine was breath taking and he was more than honoured. He said he was sad that I didn't treat myself with the same respect.
.........

That is what won my heart to Mono. It was enough to change my entire life to welcome him in it. I would do that for no other unless they treat me better. The bar is VERY high now and unreachable I think.
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  #349  
Old 10-14-2010, 09:27 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
I was at Mono's house last night, my OH (other home). PN called me at about 7 and told me that the boy had cut his head having stood up and hit it on the cupboard door in the kitchen. He was bleeding all over and scared. PN wanted to know what he should do about a bandaid as they wouldn't stick to his hair. I suggested a compress and that he wear his touque to bed for the night to keep it on. I suggested that he talk to Derby as she is a nurse. When I got off the phone I texted Derby and she called PN. She told him to wake him up at 10 to see if he was okay and didn't have a concussion. She agreed that he shouldn't have a shower to wash blood off but should wait until morning and pat it off with a wet cloth.
I'm glad he didn't require stitches. One of mine did. Their dad, instead of calling me, took them to daycare and asked what he should do. They told him to take him to the ER. He did. I think he was proud of himself that day. I, on the other hand, was livid! He didn't call me! Mom! I'm supposed to be there for that kind of thing!

Any way, give the boy a big hug & kiss, maybe a picture or two for future referrence (so he can feel all cool again down the road, lol) and send him off to school so he can wow his friends with how totally cool he is, lol.
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  #350  
Old 10-15-2010, 07:14 AM
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I am writing thoughts that have come up from this link about multi-partner co-habitation that Mono started long ago and has now started writing on again at post #49.
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I'm going to try to be as honest as possible in sharing my thoughts because I believe this is a golden opportunity for others to share in the process
okay... Mono is taking the total honesty approach with this thread so as to really let everyone know what it is like as we go through this... so I will chime in.

I'm struggling with my NRE again. I am so exited I find it difficult to be interested in PN. I love him and know this will pass, but thought I would mention it.

I think it's because he doesn't participate in stuff and this is no different. He is, by nature, very self involved and doesn't notice anything that doesn't directly influence what will happen for him. He never has. I have had to tell him every step of the way what I think and feel so he can be empathetic. It's not that he is unfeeling, just not very good at reading people, and especially me.

With this situation I feel a disconnect because of who he is. I get fed up with always having to be on top of stuff to let him in on and when I have too much going on it slips from me. I am having a huge need to cocoon now that I have my room and I don't feel like keeping him on top of where I am at. I want him to do it... but he doesn't/can't/won't. I know I have to or we just won't stay connected.

Put NRE on top of it and I'm left REALLY struggling.

Mono is opposite to PN in many ways and one is his attention to me. He notices when I am going through stuff and seems to know how to be with it. I don't feel I have to make some huge effort and don't feel its like wading through a quagmire to get to the root of things... maybe it's because we are relatively new to each other? PN didn't struggle before.. well, before our child that is.

To be completely honest I would be quite fine locking ourselves into the apartment for a week and having all our meals delivered so we could get about living there.... and stuff

Not to be, damned responsibilities.

I know this will shift. It always does. It go back and forth all the time on stuff and my energy shifts from one to the other... but because of my NNRE (new new relationship energy ) I am a little impatient and irritated that I can't just have my own way and everyone else just suck it up!
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