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  #51  
Old 07-05-2010, 06:30 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sage View Post
This is not a glib question it is totally genuine. Most mono couples find it hard to find quality time for one relationship on top of work and family commitments. I am really interested in how you polys manage multiple relationships?
Google Calendar ...(poly humour there btw)

Honestly I think its about ensuring the time you DO spend is quality. Couples if they actually look at the time they spend together quickly realize a lot of it is fluff. It really holds little meaning and actually dilutes the time they do have. Instead of having great times all the time, you just have time together.

Managing time and having time apart, can make the time you do spend more enriching. Better quality and less filler talk. At least thats what I found when we were dating. I would have date, she would have a date, all three of us would have a date...then it would be my wife and I and we found we missed each other and it became quality time.
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  #52  
Old 07-08-2010, 06:29 PM
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sage sage is offline
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Thanks Ariakis

Franklin's work on Xeromag was also useful. I really like the idea idea that time with others is often incorporated with the three of us, especially in the beginning. I was looking at time more often being split away as a twosome and as our relationship is only a couple of years old, we have his kids every other weekend, and he is my favorite person to spend time with, it's been an ongoing problem for me.

Mohegan asked why I'd rather him keep his relationship with W than have someone closer. Time is the main reason. She lives away and so impacts our time less. Anyway I am making a concerted effort to reach out to her so that she will be comfortable enough to come and spend time with us in August (this will save him wanting to go up there until I can have time off work in October). And yes, I'm using the google calendar to make sure things don't fall on "kid weekends".

Oh and Morning Glory if you're reading this I "came out" (with positiveness and even enthusiasm) to my sister yesterday. She was a bit perplexed, she's not in "relationship space" at the moment. She's a ballet mom and would rather sit around watching girls in leotards prance endlessly across sprung floors. Each to their own, but she was interested and accepting, that's the main thing to me.
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  #53  
Old 07-18-2010, 06:52 PM
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Default Begining to Feel Compersion !!

Well it seems my quest to "figure this all out" is moving ahead well.
We had one of our blissful just-us-2 two weekends. Z read something that really clicked with him and he has finally fully accepted himself as poly.
He has decided that he wants to meet some women in our area to build relationships with. Even just a few weeks ago this would have filled me with dread but yesterday morning as he was surfing around different online sites I felt a deep sense of satisfaction that I could enable the man I love to fully explore who he is.

This is a small place but we have found a triad not too far away that we are going to get together with to check out the poly scene around here.

Smiles
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