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  #11  
Old 08-15-2012, 02:03 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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LOL-ok.
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"Love As Thou Wilt"
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  #12  
Old 08-15-2012, 02:50 AM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Yup.

It's brain hormone cascade -- a high! Fun to feel certainly. Addictive, certainly. Don't have to be an academic to Google the "neuroscience of falling in love" to see what the heck is going on in there to cause the "wheeee!" hit.

But in time it tapers off to normal and you come down off the pink fluffy lala clouds. THEN the real interesting things happen in the relationship (to me anyway.) I like NRE high but I LOVE ORE. That's what turns me on the most.

But if partnered already (vs being single) I think it is on the person to balance that NRE hit thing with the established responsibilities of the ORE. No giving things a a lick and a promise. YOU can put up with no dishes and no clean laundry if you are single as the price to pay for NRE. But when OTHERS count on you for things, that's irresponsible. There's got to be a framework in place for calling into account.

"Hey, you are taking too many happy hits and shirking stuff. Shape up here some. Enjoy but do not drop balls!"

GG

Last edited by GalaGirl; 08-15-2012 at 02:52 AM.
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  #13  
Old 08-20-2012, 04:01 PM
aljs aljs is offline
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It is true and real that people in an altered state of mind from a substance or feeling often say and do things the under normal circumstances they would never do. It's also true that they can use that to diminish the pain they cause and feel.

This really speaks to me as I just realized something yesterday. When someone apologizes for hurting you with "I'm sorry, I was ______" they don't just make themselves feel less pained by their behavior.

What happened to me, was this: initially I felt, "Ok, it really hurt, but they didn't really mean it, they apologized so I'm gonna let it be." The several hours later something triggers it and the pain comes surging back like it was just said. That's when it hit me.... I was failing to fully experience that pain, because for some reason I rationalized that because of the circumstances of I was down playing it in my own head. Instead of taking it all right then and there, I shunted it aside, and then I had to deal with it all over again later.
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  #14  
Old 08-20-2012, 04:05 PM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Quote:
I was failing to fully experience that pain, because for some reason I rationalized that because of the circumstances of I was down playing it in my own head. Instead of taking it all right then and there, I shunted it aside, and then I had to deal with it all over again later.
That speaks to me. Totally.

That's why if you read some of my posts you catch me going on and on about "Everyone hold their own bag!"

Everyone has baggage. I must deal with all my baggage. You must deal with all your baggage. (Not you specifically, aljs. The "You" that is the universe of people in general. We are all that You.)

Because we tote it around whether or not we unpack it, right?

Really better to unpack, sort, keep what still works, discard what doesn't. Travel more effectively through life with up-to-date baggage you maintain neatly.

It gets really FRESH when others who do not want to deal with their baggage want to shoosh it on me. What? Why do I have to carry it when you yourself don't want it? Deal with you own -- unpack it, and sort! I can be a friend and offer advice if you want, but YOU hold the keys to that bag and only you can open it and begin the sort.

GG

Last edited by GalaGirl; 08-20-2012 at 04:08 PM.
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