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Old 08-30-2015, 01:44 AM
highlivin229 highlivin229 is offline
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So I'm married to M., who's 25, and with whom i have two small children, and also living with R., who's 21, African-American.

I wrote about my situation extensively here, but the thread got closed. Apparently I'm too perverse for this forum!

As I discussed back in May, I gave myself until the end of July to figure out what to do with R.: whether to proceed and have a child with her, or cut her loose.

Our arrangement has progressed very well. It has been rough on R. for an unexpected reason: M. (who is highly educated) has been helping R. by showing her what books to read, how to behave and dress in a manner that's more socially conservative, etc. How to fit in with a more educated crowd. What's happened is, R. has started feeling awkward around her own family, who are less well-educated. Very "Pygmalion" kind of situation.

Anyway, aside from this issue, R. is happy, M. is happy, the kids are happy, and everyone has adjusted to this new situation.

Also--and very interesting--my social set is aware that I am living with both women. There is a minority (exclusively women) who violently disapprove. They have gone so far as to cut off contact. But the vast majority of my social circle (+90%) has not had this reaction, and indeed, has accepted my living situation.

I present M. as "my wife" and R. as "my fiancée" or "my other wife". R. and I got white-gold wedding rings in July. I wear both the white-gold band and the yellow-gold (from my marriage to M.).

I think people are more sophisticated and accepting of peculiar or non-traditional household relationships. My social circle, however, is fairly educated and urbane. Perhaps it is the exception.

Anyway, we spent three weeks all together in a summer rental place; lovely. Everything went very well.

M. has told me she does not want any more children. I told her that I wanted more, and we left it at that. Though we haven't formally discussed it, she seems to be giving me tacit permission to make a child with R.

I'm concerned with the markets now. September promises to be a monster. So I'm thinking that I'll make it clear to R. that I want to continue our relationship in the direction that she wants (she wants to have my child). Assuming all goes well at work, we'll make the full-on effort in November.

That's the plan at this point. But all in all, after rereading what I wrote in previous posts, I have to say, things could not be better.

Last edited by nycindie; 08-30-2015 at 01:22 PM. Reason: link removed by Moderator
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Old 08-30-2015, 10:35 AM
Magdlyn's Avatar
Magdlyn Magdlyn is online now
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Wow, lol, how did I miss that first (closed for being inappropriate) thread of yours?

I have seen plenty of breeder fetishists and cucks and bulls on Fetlife. Why don't you head on over there and not bother our poor moderators with another fetish thread? It's kind of rude.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

A standing prick hath no conscience. --Bill Shakespeare

me: Mags, female, pansexual, 60, poly-dating, and loving and living with
miss pixi, female, pansexual, poly, 38
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Old 08-30-2015, 11:00 AM
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FallenAngelina FallenAngelina is offline
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Originally Posted by highlivin229 View Post
I wrote about my situation extensively here, but the thread got closed. Apparently I'm too perverse for this forum!

Your previous thread was closed for being off topic, not for being "too perverse." The mod explained the reasons for closing your thread and also included this request:
"I ask that no one continue this discussion by starting another thread."
~ Karen
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Old 08-30-2015, 01:21 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Default Tread carefully

Highlivin229, it was agreed among the Moderators to leave your other thread closed because it was off-topic from what this forum is about, being that the main core of your situation is your breeder fetish, rather than polyamory. I had asked that no one start another thread to continue your discussion, which now you have done. I think you should've contacted the Moderators first before starting another thread.

I am moving this thread to the Blog forum so you can use it as a journal, and ask that you focus on the polyamory aspect of your situation, rather than your fetish for impregnating multiple women, if you continue to post here. If it seems you are here solely to make incendiary posts to bait people for a reaction, it will be considered trolling and garner infractions for you. If this or any other thread you might create here devolves into heated arguments and attacks on you or other members, it will be closed.

Thank you.
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia "

An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
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Old 08-30-2015, 04:26 PM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
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Hi highlivin229,
It sounds like things are going well for you and yours.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
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Old 08-30-2015, 06:48 PM
AlwaysGrowing AlwaysGrowing is offline
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Have you clarified with M that she simply does not want to carry more children but is open to more in the house? If I were in her shoes, I would be furious if I told my partner that I didn't want to raise more children and purposefully brought more into my household where I would be a part of raising them.
Me: AG - 25yo, finding herself
Hubby: My awesome husband. Together for a decade.
Boy: Boyfriend. Known for a couple of years - involved off and on the whole time.
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Old 08-30-2015, 07:04 PM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
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Yeah, I agree, you should clarify that with M.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
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