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Old 07-09-2012, 07:26 AM
PhilosophicallyLost's Avatar
PhilosophicallyLost PhilosophicallyLost is offline
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Colorado
Posts: 48
Default Chronicles of a hopeless romantic

I figured I need a place to just voice some of the more positive things going on in my new ventures into polydom. It can be so easy to get wrapped up in the bad, especially since I've been having a lot of stress in my life over it lately (nothing really within my control, though).

This trip into poly has been difficult for Y at times, but I felt really good about some of the communication we've had the last day. Sometimes Y has a hard time opening up, but he really opened up to me about his concerns and this really made me happy. He struggles with the situation because E is always home to remind him of it. Y said it would be easier emotionally if I was dating someone who had their own place that I could visit for the night sometimes, so we started talking about how we could make it easier on Y given that E, uh, does live with us. We talked about cleaning E's room up so we have a place where E and I can have our alone time. We want to get a house, and Y thinks that having E live maybe in the basement would be easier because it would simulate that E "has a place of his own" that I can go to.

Y and E had an argument earlier today over E's hurt feelings over something Y did. Y and E sometimes really struggle with just "listening" to each other for some reason. Maybe it's a testosterone thing. For Y he has trouble hearing and addressing E's emotional concerns, and E out of frustration interrupts Y when he senses that Y doesn't seem to really understand his concerns. They are also both stubborn mules and seem not to want to be considerate of the other when they do argue. However, I was there to sorta moderate their emotions from getting too out of hand and I think they managed to come to a very decent understanding with the whole thing. Shortly afterward Y shocked me by saying E could give me a kiss on the cheek in front of Y. This has been as much support as Y has ever given towards E and I as a couple, which made me incredibly happy. The tension between the two of them seemed remarkably improved too, so today I felt we had success working as a family unit.

Keep in mind this is going on while my brother and I have been exchanging 10+ page letters to each other over him not liking my poly decision. It's been a lot of drama this weekend, so to see some light among the rubble is encouraging.
Me: K, female, 27. Married to Y for over 4 yrs (male, monogamous, 33). Opened relationship to E (male, monogamous, 27) in a relationship vee.

Last edited by PhilosophicallyLost; 07-09-2012 at 07:31 AM.
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