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View Poll Results: What are your views on porn?
I think that some porn is good and I watch some. 18 69.23%
I think that some porn is alright 4 15.38%
I think that porn is bad, but like an addict, I can't help watching some. 1 3.85%
I think that porn is bad and don't go near the stuff 0 0%
Other (please specify in replies to thread) 3 11.54%
Voters: 26. You may not vote on this poll

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  #41  
Old 06-30-2012, 04:38 AM
Mudita Mudita is offline
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Originally Posted by GalaGirl View Post
Sex ed needs to happen for these young people HARDER than ever because they go looking up all kinds of crazy online. More parents and churches need to get on board with that like with Our Whole Lives curricula. They are leaving the kids out in the cold and without clear critical thinking of the erotic materials (soft or hard) that they access.
Might need to put the parents on the course first to get that to happen.
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  #42  
Old 06-30-2012, 07:37 AM
feelyunicorn feelyunicorn is offline
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I have no general opinion on whether porn is good or bad, or what makes porn porn, but I can say that it has been on the menu for me since I was about 15, and a virgin.

Even though my fantasies have evolved, I still hold many of them from my early years of porn watching. I remember masturbating to Janet Jacme, who`s still a super turn on to me, the first time I watched a porn movie. I also remember watching a British art porn movie that was available in my local video club. I wish I could remember the title, since it was quite good.

I have never watched anything illegal, but nowadays I watch harder porn than I used to when I first started. Some of it pushes boundaries, and might be considered abusive or tasteless by mainstream standards. Stuff like the German-made GGG, as well as some amateur/reality porn. I do watch mainstream porn and cannot relate to the usual criticisms concerning how unrealistic, or prejudiced it might be. With a little bit of independent, critical thinking, it`s easy for me to set fantasy and reality apart. So, I don`t think it has been detrimental to me in any way. I also don`t really buy that porn is intrinsically abusive to women; likewise with prostitution.

Needless to say, porn has shaped my sexual development, and it is so entwined with my sex life that it`s hard to know which fantasies made me watch certain kinds of porn, and which fantasies were brought about by porn. The same could be said for which looks I go for in women. When I first became sexually active, I wasn`t into anal sex. Nowadays, it`s a major fantasy of mine, as is CIM. Those fantasies are probably a legacy of porn. But, I think eventually I would have gotten into it, anyway.

I`ll watch porn whether or not I have available partners, but I watch it less the more I have sex.

I've had sex with a minor Brazilian pornstar, and have gotten in touch with German pornstar Melanie Moon, whom I want to fuck at some point. I wouldn`t mind actually acting in porn, and I have a standing offer to do homemade. I have a feeling I might be good at it, especially since I can cum on cue. I`ll go as long, or as fast as I wish; and I have experience with all kinds of partners, situations, and most sexual acts.

Nowadays, it is rare that I masturbate without porn. I do not use it for added stimulus when I`m having sex with a partner, but I`d rather be with partners who enjoy and are well-versed in porn. Women who watch porn are a super turn on. I do not watch gay or bi porn, though I now and then spend some time looking at pictures of men.

Beats me how all this is related to polyamory, but happy wankin`!
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Last edited by feelyunicorn; 06-30-2012 at 08:01 AM.
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  #43  
Old 06-30-2012, 08:12 AM
Tonberry Tonberry is offline
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Since feelyunicorn mentioned his introduction to porn... I figured I would too

First, a bit of backstory. For my 10th birthday, my parents got me only books, and lots of them. From that point on, I read a lot and often, although they say they got me books because I liked to read so I must have started earlier than that.
The point is, I was following a bunch of collections. Things in the veins of Goosebumps, although not this specific one, none where horror. One was humour, one was medical, one was romance...
And that's the one that interest us here.

I was on vacation with my family when I was 12 or so, maybe even a bit younger. We were in a vacation club, where you'd rent a house, and there was a center in the middle with stores, etc. I would often go there on my own, go to a bookstore and buy a bunch of books. Once I did that, and decided to pick up some more romance books.
They didn't have the series I was following ("Grenadine Heart". Stories of girls around my age having school romances) but they had a lot of romance books and so I picked one up.
It turned out to have an erotic scene in it, although for the most part it was plain romance. It was my first experience actually reading about a sex scene. I went back to the store and bought some more after I was done that one.

I'm still a bit curious. I was obviously a kid, and the clerk was selling me graphical books. He didn't seem to care. I'm also didn't hide the books when reading them so my parents must have known what I was reading. Did everybody assume the romance had no sex? (I guess it's not a stretch, I did assume that, but I was young and they were adults. And it was like the most famous erotic books publisher.)

Anyways, that's for written material. As far as visual material goes, I once went to a political thing with some other students when I was in high school, and it was two days long so we had hotel rooms. I stayed with another female who was older than me (I must have been 16 and 17) and who watched porn in the hotel room. I remember looking at it from the top bunk bed, and being aroused but a bit turned off at the same time (not enough affection going on, and it kept switching scenes and having different people having sex, I couldn't follow the story).
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  #44  
Old 06-30-2012, 08:43 AM
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Scott Scott is offline
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Originally Posted by Mudita View Post
Might need to put the parents on the course first to get that to happen.
Lol :-). So funny, yet so true.
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  #45  
Old 06-30-2012, 09:01 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by feelyunicorn View Post
I have no general opinion on whether porn is good or bad, or what makes porn porn, but I can say that it has been on the menu for me since I was about 15, and a virgin.

Even though my fantasies have evolved, I still hold many of them from my early years of porn watching. I remember masturbating to Janet Jacme, who`s still a super turn on to me, the first time I watched a porn movie. I also remember watching a British art porn movie that was available in my local video club. I wish I could remember the title, since it was quite good.

I have never watched anything illegal, but nowadays I watch harder porn than I used to when I first started. Some of it pushes boundaries, and might be considered abusive or tasteless by mainstream standards. Stuff like the German-made GGG, as well as some amateur/reality porn. I do watch mainstream porn and cannot relate to the usual criticisms concerning how unrealistic, or prejudiced it might be. With a little bit of independent, critical thinking, it`s easy for me to set fantasy and reality apart. So, I don`t think it has been detrimental to me in any way. I also don`t really buy that porn is intrinsically abusive to women; likewise with prostitution.

Needless to say, porn has shaped my sexual development, and it is so entwined with my sex life that it`s hard to know which fantasies made me watch certain kinds of porn, and which fantasies were brought about by porn. The same could be said for which looks I go for in women. When I first became sexually active, I wasn`t into anal sex. Nowadays, it`s a major fantasy of mine, as is CIM. Those fantasies are probably a legacy of porn. But, I think eventually I would have gotten into it, anyway.

I`ll watch porn whether or not I have available partners, but I watch it less the more I have sex.

I've had sex with a minor Brazilian pornstar, and have gotten in touch with German pornstar Melanie Moon, whom I want to fuck at some point. I wouldn`t mind actually acting in porn, and I have a standing offer to do homemade. I have a feeling I might be good at it, especially since I can cum on cue. I`ll go as long, or as fast as I wish; and I have experience with all kinds of partners, situations, and most sexual acts.

Nowadays, it is rare that I masturbate without porn. I do not use it for added stimulus when I`m having sex with a partner, but I`d rather be with partners who enjoy and are well-versed in porn. Women who watch porn are a super turn on. I do not watch gay or bi porn, though I now and then spend some time looking at pictures of men.

Beats me how all this is related to polyamory, but happy wankin`!
Thanks for sharing. As to whether porn is related to polyamory, I would say that a lot of it may be how you define porn, and how one defines love (something that I link closely to polyamory myself) may also have something to do with it.

For starters, I think a certain question must be asked: how do we define love? I define it as caring for someone deeply. Now we get into another issue; love at first sight. Some people may not believe it exists. This group of people doesn't include me. Now combine porn with love at first sight and I think you'll see where I'm going. Now, in the past, I've mentioned that just because you may love someone at first sight does -not- mean that this type of love is the same as the kind that I believe can only develop through a larger span of time. I've called it "beginning love" in the past and I think it's a good expression.

Now for the other part of polyamory; the many aspect. I think few would say that when they watch porn, they watch one indivual only; no, I think that almost -everyone- who sees porn sees -multiple- people. This is where the other element I strongly associate with polyamory the poly/many aspect of it, comes in.

The truth of the matter is, that while I like the concept of polyamory in theory, I've never actually experienced it up close, if you will; up close, I've only had one girlfriend at a time; I may have dalied with others, but those daliances were almost always at a distance; on the phone or online. There was only one exception and it was a light one; when I had my last girlfriend, Karla, I also was really attracted to another woman named Dorcas, but for almost the entire time that I was in Mexico (which is where I met her), we only got as far as a few kisses and what I affectionaly called a "nariseada" (essentially i rubbed my nose on her shoulder while we were both lying in my bed with some other friends and she laughed; I had a queen size bed, laugh :-)). After about a year of knowing her, I decided I needed to go back to Canada; only on my farewell party did I actually french her; we played something like spin the bottle; she frenched everyone else -before- me though; her girl friend and even her own brother before frenching me, laugh :-).

I'd actually broken up with Karla at that point in time, and I lost contact with her not too long after coming back to Canada. With Dorcas, on the other hand, the relationship has continued for 4 years now, despite the fact that she's since acquired a boyfriend and later married him. So I guess you could say that for most of my life, long distance relationships have been the norm for me; what I dislike about porn is the fact that in almost all the porn I have seen, the people I've seen in it haven't known me; like TV or the movies, it's generally been a one way connection and that's not my favourite way of doing things. But unrequited, beginner's love can still be love. I'm still hoping that I can get another of these "girlfriend experiences" though, because I think there's many things I'd still like to learn there, laugh :-).

Last edited by Scott; 06-30-2012 at 09:07 AM.
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  #46  
Old 06-30-2012, 09:06 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tonberry View Post
Since feelyunicorn mentioned his introduction to porn... I figured I would too

First, a bit of backstory. For my 10th birthday, my parents got me only books, and lots of them. From that point on, I read a lot and often, although they say they got me books because I liked to read so I must have started earlier than that.
The point is, I was following a bunch of collections. Things in the veins of Goosebumps, although not this specific one, none where horror. One was humour, one was medical, one was romance...
And that's the one that interest us here.

I was on vacation with my family when I was 12 or so, maybe even a bit younger. We were in a vacation club, where you'd rent a house, and there was a center in the middle with stores, etc. I would often go there on my own, go to a bookstore and buy a bunch of books. Once I did that, and decided to pick up some more romance books.
They didn't have the series I was following ("Grenadine Heart". Stories of girls around my age having school romances) but they had a lot of romance books and so I picked one up.
It turned out to have an erotic scene in it, although for the most part it was plain romance. It was my first experience actually reading about a sex scene. I went back to the store and bought some more after I was done that one.

I'm still a bit curious. I was obviously a kid, and the clerk was selling me graphical books. He didn't seem to care. I'm also didn't hide the books when reading them so my parents must have known what I was reading. Did everybody assume the romance had no sex? (I guess it's not a stretch, I did assume that, but I was young and they were adults. And it was like the most famous erotic books publisher.)

Anyways, that's for written material. As far as visual material goes, I once went to a political thing with some other students when I was in high school, and it was two days long so we had hotel rooms. I stayed with another female who was older than me (I must have been 16 and 17) and who watched porn in the hotel room. I remember looking at it from the top bunk bed, and being aroused but a bit turned off at the same time (not enough affection going on, and it kept switching scenes and having different people having sex, I couldn't follow the story).
Lol :-). I've also felt that in most mainstream porn, the storyline is downright awful, which is why I almost never see any mainstream porn. Anyway, I thought I'd also introduce how I first came across porn, if you'd like to call it that; basically, I was reading a marvel comic (I can't remember which title now), and there was this scene with these... something close to a goddess in it... they did have Thor in marvel comics, as well as the pantheon from which he came, so they did have them. She was very scantily dressed.. a while back I'd felt some kind of tingle from holding my penis, and somehow I decided to rub it.. it was the very first time I orgasmed, which is why I doubt that I'll ever forget the experience. I'd love to find the comic that brought this on as it'd be nice to have some memorabilia of the event and the goddess that brought it on, laugh :-).
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  #47  
Old 06-30-2012, 08:11 PM
feelyunicorn feelyunicorn is offline
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I`ll mention one more thing about porn, and that is that it gave me models for empowered female behavior. Certainly way more than Hollywood has.

Usually, porn is criticized as being objectifying of women. But, some women in porn have provided me with role models for precisely the opposite. Women like Nina Hartley, Stoya, Tori Black, and Tristan Taormino behind the cameras; just to mention a few examples.

I also don`t buy that men and women intrinsically want to watch different things all the time. I remember once renting a video from a grungy, indie video store on the Lower East Side of Manhattan called Kim`s. Locals may know which one I`m talking about. Very socially aware video club...

It labelled itself feminist porn shot from a female-perspective, but still featured the main actress and director swallowing loads of cum on her knees and whatnot because that`s what she enjoyed. This was not Cinderella bullshit. Huge turn on to anyone who might watch mainstream porn, as well. And, when you take a look at it, women who are more sexually assertive than they are "in real life" represents at least 50% of all mainstream porn that I see in online porn hubs, which would signal to me that it`s a widespread (and, I suspect, largely unattended) male fantasy.

I guess these women I admire in porn are the ones who call themselves sex-positive feminists.
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Last edited by feelyunicorn; 06-30-2012 at 08:26 PM.
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