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Old 06-03-2012, 10:31 PM
gwendolenthefair's Avatar
gwendolenthefair gwendolenthefair is offline
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Default For those who use polymatchmaker.com, your mail is not secure there

I wanted to let the folks here who use polymatchmaker.com know that the people who run the site are reading your mail. I doubt they are reading all of it, but in at least some cases, they absolutely are.

I was on "notice" there because I had openly criticized the moderation in the forums more than once, and the situation got kind of ugly the second time. I stopped using the forums completely, but still read them, and used the site as it is intended, as a dating site. Today I wrote a private email to someone there in response to a forum post of theirs that I felt was sexist and offensive. I got a warning from the site telling me that I had just insulted a member there (I had not), and if it happened again, I would be booted from the site. I then went to my outbox, to the place where it tells you if and when a message is read. Well, it told me that my message HADN'T been read yet. At least, it hadn't been read yet by the intended recipient.

If they are reading my mail there, they could be reading yours. Please, everyone, be careful there, and please get the word out about this.

I am not sure what forum this belongs in, so mods, feel free to move it if you think it's misplaced here.
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Old 06-03-2012, 10:39 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Are you sure that they read everybody's? Maybe they only read the mail of people they consider "troublemakers." What I mean is, since you were already "on notice," perhaps they were monitoring your mails specifically because of that. I know that I had to let them know about a week ago that a guy I had blocked was still able to send me emails, and they asked me to flag that message for them. So I had the sense that they weren't going in my inbox unless I asked them to. Were any of your problems there also involving communication between you and other members, I mean besides just forum posts?
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
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Last edited by nycindie; 06-04-2012 at 02:17 AM.
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