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  #11  
Old 06-03-2012, 04:26 PM
chrisjohn9 chrisjohn9 is offline
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yes thats what my wife wants too, something more open and loving or at least thats what she discusses with me
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  #12  
Old 06-04-2012, 02:57 AM
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Well luckily a lot of the same principles apply to many different kinds of relationships, monogamous, polyamorous, swing, open, closed, etc.

One of the most important things we can discover is that communication is the key to a great many things in a relationship, not among the least of which is a greater level of intimacy.

Another thing that helps a lot is to understand your partner's love language. Sometimes, things that seem very loving to one person, don't have all much value towards another person. So, for example, if "Physical Touch" is one person's love language, but "Quality Time" is the other person's love language, then they should try to learn to "speak" to each other in each other's language. (Hope that makes some sense.)

Check out the http://www.morethantwo.com/ site, and keep checking out stuff on Polyamory.com. You'll find ideas for good relationships, even if they don't involve multiple partners.
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  #13  
Old 06-04-2012, 09:03 AM
chrisjohn9 chrisjohn9 is offline
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thanks kdt, the links and reading up on things always helps. the communication has become better, mostly as things have been changing and the question that has come up is whether its possible to have one person fill one need and others fill another and thats what we have been talking about
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  #14  
Old 06-04-2012, 08:20 PM
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Well, that's a good discussion to have, and certainly one of the issues (or benefits) that comes up about poly/non-monogamy. It's nice not to have to be "everything" to another person, and it's nice to have variety in one's life to "fill some of those missing spaces." Traditional monogamists no doubt have some of those spaces, but not too many, and they get along fine, it works for them, and that's great. But polyamory (and other versions of responsible non-monogamy) is just nice because it offers more choices.
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  #15  
Old 06-05-2012, 09:44 AM
chrisjohn9 chrisjohn9 is offline
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it seems so, my wife is going on a trip for work starting saturday and she wants to stay there for a few days to see what the beach and nightlife is like, so she is excited to explore some
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  #16  
Old 06-05-2012, 01:43 PM
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Sounds like that will be a good experience for her.
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  #17  
Old 06-06-2012, 09:25 AM
chrisjohn9 chrisjohn9 is offline
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yes she is anxious to go and has been shopping all week looking for outfits. thanks for your support on all this we appreciate it
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  #18  
Old 06-06-2012, 08:21 PM
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No prob.
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  #19  
Old 06-07-2012, 10:35 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chrisjohn9 View Post
well thanks, we must admit we really dont know much about this lifestyle. a friend we chat with said to join this website as he said he thought this was a fitting thing for us to get into. is there more information about what this lifestyle is or how it works?
There really is no specific polyamorous lifestyle, since there are so many ways people live and and how they choose to approach ethical non-monogamy. So, no one can really say, "This is how you do it." We can only say, "This is how we do it." What you can do is read and talk about what kinds of relationships you want and how to incorporate them into your own unique lifestyle. If you have specific questions, start a thread in one of the other forums here and ask away!
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
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  #20  
Old 06-07-2012, 10:26 PM
chrisjohn9 chrisjohn9 is offline
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thanks cindie, we have a lot of questions but right now we are just reading what others say and are learning. I am sure at some point we will start a thread.
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