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View Poll Results: How long has your poly relationship lasted so far?
1 year 6 42.86%
2 years 3 21.43%
4 years 1 7.14%
8 years 0 0%
10 years or more 4 28.57%
Voters: 14. You may not vote on this poll

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  #41  
Old 05-27-2010, 04:56 AM
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Yup! Even as I was writing it, Mono/RP/PN's thread did occur to me. So they're not "most" people... well we knew that!! LoL

For the record, my life is fucking awesome! I love my husband, we just bought a house. I love my job, I love my career (not quite one and the same). I'm super excited that I'm going to Nepal in November, and also excited to go to Vancouver in July. I've got great friends, and my cats are really cool. Oh, and I just found this new distribution of Linux, it's pretty sweet. Only complaint is that my yard is full of dandelions that just went to seed before I caught them. Can't complain about a life like that!!
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  #42  
Old 05-27-2010, 05:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
Vancouver in July.
Come visit???!!!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
I think that's typical human behaviour.

When things are going good, most people are too busy riding the "happy wave" to take time out for keeping their friends up to date.

But when things are going poorly, we need to reach out for support, and that's a lot of what we see here.
Just a note that actually some stuff in my life actually really sucks right now but this isn't the place for it... when things suck in my relationships I don't tend to talk about it on here because too many people know me now. I learn from what others write and refect on what I have learned quite often.
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  #43  
Old 02-11-2011, 05:45 PM
meyesekrit meyesekrit is offline
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Default Length of time and configuration

Just hit the 6 month mark on our V...and was talking with a partner about length of time poly relationships can last.

I've tried searching the forums, but haven't found a thread with concise "data" on member experiences.

Anyone care to share info on your longest running poly relationships (oh, how I hope it's X years and COUNTING!!!) and what structure that relationship is? (ie, triad, V, tribe, etc)

Really would appreciate the support of knowing, with hard work, we can make this last for years and years to come.

Cheers,
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  #44  
Old 02-11-2011, 06:29 PM
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Cool

Personally, we're barely at the two-year mark...though there was some off-and-on times particularly at the beginning. We're a triad now but the first half of it we were more of a vee.

I've met others that have been together much longer. I believe the local poly group has a FMF triad who's been together like almost two decades. (From what I recall.)
And a few months ago, I exchanged emails with an MMM triad on the other side of the country who've been together about 11 years.
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  #45  
Old 02-11-2011, 06:35 PM
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My primary and I have been together for over nine years, and we've been open from the beginning. I was the hinge in a V for about two-and-a-half years, but the secondary relationship ended. I think it's completely possible to make a poly relationship, in whatever configuration, last longer than our V lasted. That relationship ended for reasons unrelated to polyamory.
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  #46  
Old 02-11-2011, 10:15 PM
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You can probably find a lot of what you're looking for in the Personal Summaries thread.
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  #47  
Old 02-11-2011, 11:28 PM
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Redpepper has been with PN for 13 years I believe. We've been a couple for just over two years and she and Derby just had a one year anniversary
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  #48  
Old 02-11-2011, 11:59 PM
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I took the liberty of merging...
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  #49  
Old 02-12-2011, 01:34 AM
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Oh I'm so confused now. LOL


On that note...Our longest relationships lasted about 3 years and have been mfmf. Basically, my wife and I, and another couple. Our shortest, have been triads which were 2-3 months at best. We tried both MFM, and FMF. Neither seemed to work for us. So for us, it seems that MFMF works best.
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  #50  
Old 04-20-2011, 07:17 PM
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If we want to see if poly can be as long term as mono, we should compare proportionally. Sure, most of us know more long-term mono relationships that poly but most of us also know more mono break-ups and disasters than poly. If you have been hanging out in poly circles for a long time that might be different.

But, statistically there is little chance that the first relationship you have will last the rest of your life. That is because not all people fit well together and you learn things as you go. Thus, why would we think it likely that the first poly relationship that you have will last forever? There will be new people and dynamics, as well as new things to learn.

Now then, my husband was my first boyfriend, we started our relationship when I was 16 and got married when I was 20, I am now 23. My girlfriend started her relationship with her husband (her 2nd boyfriend) at 17, married at 20 and is now 25. And now we have entered the first poly relationship for us all (Z). There might be a statistician here who could tell me what the pathetically long odds are for a till death do us part are. But we are all very happy now and hopefully in the future as well.
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