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  #1  
Old 05-02-2012, 12:43 PM
Ready2Fly Ready2Fly is offline
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Default In love with Monogirl. Oldest story in the book.

*lovelorn sigh*

We are with each other almost every day. We wine and dine each other, walk down the street arm in arm, take road trips together, go dancing together, sleep in the same bed together... every time I'm with her I admire her more and more and fall a little bit more in love. She's my wife's best friend. It's perfect.

But she's monogamous. She'd join us, except, "you're married! I can't get past that." Sometimes when we're out together, there'll be enough electricity that we lean in to each other to kiss. But then we remember and pull back.

This was all fine for a while. I was plenty happy to have her as a friend, or whatever connection she was able to offer. Then she went on a couple of dates last week, and suddenly I felt the loss. I suddenly recognized exactly how much I really love her and want her. But of course I can't have her. Whatever closeness we have is doomed to die once she finds a monogamous guy to have a real relationship with. Then the wining and dining will stop, the road trips will end, the quasi-dates will be no more, and she'll be just a friend, if she doesn't disappear altogether.

So I've been truly lovesick all week for what must eventually be. Can't really keep my mind on my work right now, so I'm writing just to get it off my chest. Love is hard.
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  #2  
Old 05-02-2012, 03:24 PM
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CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
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You most definitely have my sympathies. Situations like these are heart-wrenching.

But it sounds like you recognise that it's not going to be, because of her own wiring and boundaries. You are being realistic.

It hurts, but isn't it better to feel such a powerful thing, and sometimes have it hurt, than to go through life never feeling anything at all?
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  #3  
Old 05-02-2012, 04:22 PM
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Castalia Castalia is offline
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I'm sorry, that sucks. I understand the feelings completely.
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  #4  
Old 05-02-2012, 07:10 PM
Ready2Fly Ready2Fly is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CielDuMatin View Post

It hurts, but isn't it better to feel such a powerful thing, and sometimes have it hurt, than to go through life never feeling anything at all?
Absolutely. I would have left this situation behind long ago if it wasn't worth it. If she wasn't worth it.
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  #5  
Old 05-03-2012, 05:38 AM
fkarl fkarl is offline
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I feel your pain too. I have a similar situation but she has never really acknowledged the feelings until recently. I'd be happy just to snuggle on the couch watching a movie but she "can't do that". We've talked about it and she's one of those that can't be that close physically without wanting to act on it. So, out of respect for her wishes and the fact she has a new boyfriend, I don't see her much. We work together and go for walks during her lunch break a couple times per week. I know it will eventually end. But I wouldn't have missed it for the world. She's totally awesome. My hope is that I'll be happy when she finally marries. That I'll be happy she's happy. I've met the boyfriend, he knows how close she and I are and is ok with it. Super nice guy. I know she'll be in good hands if it turns out he's "the one". But I'll miss her.
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