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  #21  
Old 04-18-2012, 05:20 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by insanity View Post
obvously I am the one to decide about my own feelings.. but I get confused sometimes even when knowing the answer..
There have been some steps I needed to take to come to a place were no confusion would blurry my vision. First of all, realizing for myself that this is possible. The only thing that helped me with that was time. The years of experiencing love in more than the exclusive way were that impossible to ignore that my mind just surrendered. Therefore I came to accept the simple fact that loving more than one is possible.

The second step was even harder: EXPLAINING to others how that works. That was really hard. How to explain to others what you yourself just barely grasped? There have been many talks about my inner workings, at home with my men, with friends, as well as on this forum. Therefore I would say, that 'knowing' an answer emotionally and 'knowing' an answer literally are two different things and sometimes don't come naturally with each other.

Don't push things, just experience what you feel and the answer will come later. That's what my solution looked like
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  #22  
Old 04-18-2012, 06:23 AM
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kdt26417 and Phy, you are both so right..

I know only time is needed..
Boyfriend finally agreed to listen to what this 'polyamory' is and why I am so caught up in it.. (that happened after a weird kind of a talk that almost sent us apart in different ways, but that wasn't the right thing to do) so wish me luck
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  #23  
Old 04-18-2012, 06:26 AM
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Delivered as asked: Wishing you luck
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  #24  
Old 04-18-2012, 06:45 AM
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thanks
I hope it works this time.. I so want to be happy for once
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  #25  
Old 04-18-2012, 03:56 PM
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A suggestion I make to others - if your partner wants more information or has questions, you might want to suggest he get a login here and pose them to a larger group.
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  #26  
Old 04-20-2012, 03:02 AM
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Have you had "The Big Talk" yet? I hope it goes well. Franklin Veaux's website is also a good place to go to get some of your questions answered.
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  #27  
Old 04-21-2012, 06:47 PM
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We had the talk... should I post it here or in another thread? because it is all on a different level now..
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  #28  
Old 04-21-2012, 06:53 PM
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If you keep it in one thread it's easier for those reading along to read back and get a context for the narrative. :-)
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  #29  
Old 04-21-2012, 07:46 PM
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I just let it all out and even used the word 'polyamory'.

blah blah blah (had long talks through some nights)

Decided to stay together and that he will need time and try to undertand me and accept me as I am.

I feel SO relieved now, should have done it before.
But I feel like I'm hurting him by letting him know that 'he is not the only one' although my love to him hasn't change a bit (actually this made me realize that i love him a lot more than I thought)
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  #30  
Old 04-21-2012, 08:55 PM
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Sounds like overall it went pretty well, not perfectly, perhaps, but as well as I'd hoped for sure.
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