Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Poly Relationships Corner


Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 02-06-2012, 08:24 PM
nscotiax3 nscotiax3 is offline
New Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 2
Default Question about Kids, Law and Nova Scotia, Canada

Hi and thanks for reading this over!

I am the male in a mFF polygamous relationship. I am straight and my wife and our girlfriend are both BI.

My wife and I have 3 children, and our partner also has 3 children ages varying from 2 to 14. We are considering the possibility within the next year of moving into the same home together and we would like to know if anyone knows much at all about the implications of doing so without adding marriage into the picture. None of us are legally married, but my wife and I are currently in common-law status.

Specifically we are trying to cover our rears as far as teachers who get nosy or anyone else who might want to cause grief for us by using the safety and welfare of the children as an excuse to cause trouble. Let it be said that we are all very good, caring parents who believe in education, arts and diversity. We do not hide who we are from our children and they are all aware of the relationship their parents have and are accustomed to us being together or at least the ones old enough to understand are aware in any case.

We realize we should seek council from an attorney to get the full factual information we need pertaining to the law, but we'd also like to hear about what some of you here may have encountered and what advice you might have that would help deal with these issues whether specific to our geographic location or just for life in general.

Thank you again for your time and we look forward to hearing from you!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2012, 03:18 AM
Tonberry Tonberry is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Oregon, USA
Posts: 1,443

I don't know about the legality of it, but I think nowadays being roommates isn't that rare to share costs. The idea of two opposite sex couples sharing a house is less likely to spur questions that if it was one man and three women or one woman and three men.

I understand the worry but I think if you're natural about it, people should leave you alone. If asked, just say you're friends and figured living together would help you because there would be more adults around all the kids.

I wouldn't recommend being open about it, but that's really the only advice I can give you. I hope that someone will have better law-oriented advice for you.
Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2012, 05:53 AM
ImaginaryIllusion's Avatar
ImaginaryIllusion ImaginaryIllusion is offline
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,991

There's a lot of information and links regarding the laws in Canada stemming from the BC Reference Case on Polygamy and Group Marriages which wrapped up with a decision this fall. Check the late part of the thread with some articles regarding the legal opinions around the decision.

There was a further custody case in Australia I think where the judge simply threw out any evidence about a poly relationship as irrelevant.

You'll need to get your own legal opinion on what you can do, and what your risks with custody or family issues, and make your own decision. However the gist of the decision from the reference case is that poly relationships themselves are legal...just the ceremony really that causes the problem. And if you're not doing anything illegal, then the teachers and neighbors should be minding their own business instead of yours.
Of course, what should be and what is, isn't always similar...especially in Halifax.

Good Luck.
“People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.” - Chinese Proverb

-Imaginary Illusion

How did I get here & Where am I going?
Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2012, 07:29 AM
redpepper's Avatar
redpepper redpepper is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,723

I live in a MFM vee in our house and its been a non-issue from the get go so far (year and a half). Everyone thinks he's our roommate. That works for us. No one is that nosy that they would ask. People likely talk, but, meh, let em.
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM
My blog
Reply With Quote
Old 02-09-2012, 08:27 PM
nscotiax3 nscotiax3 is offline
New Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 2
Smile Thanks for the info!

Hey folks, thank you for the information. I don't suppose any of you know a lawyer in the HRM that knows anything about this sort of thing in specific or anyone along those lines do you?

Thanks in advance if so!
Reply With Quote

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT. The time now is 10:27 AM.