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  #11  
Old 01-29-2012, 09:20 PM
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zappafreak zappafreak is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JaneQSmythe View Post
Zappafreak: Hello, and welcome! I'm tickled that you found something in the first post that you read here (mine ) that you can relate to.



It does make sense... but I have certainly also talked with poly people who objected to some/many of Heinlein's concepts (especially with regards to women). I do have to point out sometimes that the man started writing about this mid-century when our society was in a much different place and we didn't have the benefit of all of the writings and conversations that have occurred over the past several decades.

Cherie L. Ve Ard wrote a very nice article on the "Influence of the Science Fiction Writings of Robert A. Heinlein on Polyamory" if you are interested in reading more about it...http://www.serolynne.com/heinlein.htm

For those of us who started reading Heinlein at a very young age I agree with what NovemberRain pointed out above (sorry NR - I don't know how to quote from a different post yet) "I think being exposed to such ideas so young, as if they were the most ordinary thing in the world ~ makes them quite ordinary."

Of course I have also conversed with tons of RAH fans who object to his treatment of sex/love/relationships...but THAT doesn't surprise me at all. (Nor does the fact that my intro thread turns into a Books/SF/Heinlein thread - that happens to me a LOT - I could post in a knitting forum and would STILL end up talking about this!)
Hey - thanks on that link to that article, that was very interesting...it helps me see how RAH influenced my thinking on sex and relationships. To be honest I haven't re-read any of his books in several years, but I definitely have a desire to do so again!
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  #12  
Old 01-29-2012, 10:19 PM
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BrigidsDaughter BrigidsDaughter is offline
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Welcome to the forum. We too have more books than places to put them. I'm more of a fantasy and mystery lover; but Runic Wolf is an avid sci-fi reader. We also happen to be good friends with several authors, including CJ Henderson. A couple years back we bought a Nook, which is a life saver as we are running out of space for bookshelves.
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  #13  
Old 01-30-2012, 01:01 AM
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polandrylady polandrylady is offline
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Cool Haha

I love the original post! I like the tag line, are you straight, gay or just "no".... yeah some are just no... would that be asexual though? hehehe lol
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  #14  
Old 01-30-2012, 12:16 PM
threesnocrowd threesnocrowd is offline
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Hi JaneQ,
Your happiness and enthusiasm for life just flows out of your words! Looks like you have such a wonderful, full, loving home. Congrats to you, your hubby, and bf for continuing to make it work and best of luck to you all!
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  #15  
Old 02-07-2012, 12:16 AM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is offline
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Thank you all for your kind words and welcome!

I've been feeling the need to share my journey in more detail (if only to figure out how we got to where we are!) so I have started posting in the Life Stories section:
http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=20799
(Warning: I tend to be very verbose - as I am sure you have noticed)

Looking forward to having many more conversations with all of you - here, there, and in the threads.
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Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" Vee-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (together 21+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (together 3+ yrs) and MrS's best friend
Lotus: poly bi female, "it's complicated" relationships with Dude/JaneQ/MrS
TT: poly bi male, married to Lotus, FB with JaneQ
VV and MsJ: bi-women with male primaries, LTR LDR FWBs to JaneQ


My poly blogs on this site:
The Journey of JaneQSmythe
The Notebook of JaneQSmythe
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  #16  
Old 01-19-2014, 03:22 AM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is offline
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Default Another Introduction

Wow, I can't believe that it has already been almost two years since I wrote the above introduction and started participating here on poly.com (time sure flies)!

I thought I would resurrect my old "Introductions" thread to formally introduce the newest addition to our "polycule" - Lotus.

Interval History: Our "co-habitating open-but-not-looking Poly Vee" continued to (mostly) quietly roll smoothly along as we let the dynamics grow and shift and expand as we discovered the "new normal" and NRE faded into the much more comfortable ERE that I enjoy so much.

About two years in (early last year) we decided that we were strong and stable enough to look into expanding our horizons. Over a period of months we all posted profiles on OKC. My intention was to find local bi-poly-married women to befriend for mutual conversation and support ("benefits" optional ). Dude was "looking for" another girlfriend. MrS signed up just to support us (so we all could link to each other's profiles) - AND to see how he "matched" with us by their algorithm (I think it tickled him that he was a one point better match for me than Dude was, no matter how many questions we all answered).

As a result of my OKC profile I did have several interesting conversations and ended up attending a few Meet-Ups in the city (with one or the other of my boys, or by myself), which led to me attending a local kink event to "dip my toes in". I had a few fun, flirty experiences along the way.

As a result of Dude's profile he contacted and conversed with a LOT of women. Dude is persistent and can be very eloquent with the written word when he tries - I think his message-to-response ratio was way higher than many guys are reporting. (I also proof-read his profile ). He went on a few dates, had a little sex, and THEN...enter Lotus.

Lotus: Like me, she is a poly-bi-married woman - (married 8 years to TT). We also happen to be the same age (she is one month younger than I am) UNLIKE me, she is a sexy curvy kinky red-head . She and Dude had only messaged back-and-forth a few times when he invited her to a concert we were all attending (along with a friend of ours). She accepted! (I thought she was so brave when we picked her up at her house and she got into a car with four "strangers" - three of whom were MEN). The rest, as they say, is history...

In a few weeks Dude and Lotus are "boyfriend/girlfriend" and within a few months she is entwined in our lives and a welcome member of our "nest". We have met and hung out with her husband, our dogs have been to each others houses, we have had "the conversations" that needed to happen - shared histories and test results, etc. (She's even met my parents )Hit some speed-bumps and recovered.

By happy serendipity, I found my poly-bi-married female friendship I was looking for in Dude's girlfriend (For the curious: yes, "with benefits" - and then some! ) We've taken down our OKC profiles, and re-instated the "open-but-NOT-looking" for the center three (me/Dude/Lotus) of our new Poly-W - to allow the dynamic to settle and stabilize between all of us.

For another thread I created a diagram of our current polycule:

(I'm the purple dot!)

Bedsharing: To continue to conversation about bed-sharing generated upstream...

Sometimes some combination of all of us meet up in the city, or at Lotus and TT's house. More often she comes down to our home and stays for a few days or a weekend. (She lives about an hour away).

Four in a bed is not a problem (especially when 3 of them are "cuddlers" -and our schedules still are staggered). Usually we sleep MFMF but occasionally we end up MFFM (if Lotus and I go to bed before the boys - apparently our "entwining" is hard to untangle).

MrS almost always gets "his"edge, and sleeps next to me, who has been trained over the last 21 years to NOT overly cuddle him. (Interesting side story - one night, when it was just the three of us, the boys ended up on the wrong sides of the bed - Dude could NOT get me to cuddle him AT ALL and I just about cuddled MrS OUT of bed).

One morning, after a MFFM sleeping night, after I had already left for work, Lotus found herself inches from a sleeping MrS...she said that she was "this" close to given him a cuddle...but she wasn't sure how appropriate/welcome that would have been...oh, the dilemmas! (For the record - we all agree that would have been appropriate and MrS confirms that it would NOT have been unwelcome. (She admits to having a little crush on him - and he, like me and Dude, thinks that she is fantastic.)

I love getting up in the morning while they are all sleeping and then kissing all these sweeties goodbye when I leave. Each one has a different reaction: MrS sighs contentedly - then keeps on snoring; Dude - hungry for physical affection, even in his sleep - insistently nuzzles for "more"; Lotus - the lightest sleeper in the bunch - slowly blinks her big eyes at me and smiles sleepily. What an excellent way to start my day!
__________________
Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" Vee-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (together 21+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (together 3+ yrs) and MrS's best friend
Lotus: poly bi female, "it's complicated" relationships with Dude/JaneQ/MrS
TT: poly bi male, married to Lotus, FB with JaneQ
VV and MsJ: bi-women with male primaries, LTR LDR FWBs to JaneQ


My poly blogs on this site:
The Journey of JaneQSmythe
The Notebook of JaneQSmythe

Last edited by JaneQSmythe; 01-19-2014 at 03:47 AM.
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  #17  
Old 01-19-2014, 06:25 PM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
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Thanks for that update JQ. I see that there is a lot of love in your poly family, which does my heart good.
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  #18  
Old 01-21-2014, 03:06 AM
GalaGirl GalaGirl is offline
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Glad thing are going well!

Galagirl
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  #19  
Old 01-21-2014, 04:21 AM
pulliman pulliman is offline
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Thanks for posting on my blog, and for writing about your own life, too! It's so cool to see things flow so easily. And cuddling - ha. WI is not a cuddler. AM is. Makes for interesting times when we share a bed, which isn't often enough. I laughed at the dynamics you describe. I hope to make it there, one day...
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