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Old 01-06-2012, 08:29 PM
Minxxa Minxxa is offline
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Originally Posted by dingedheart View Post
Km34, you're so very right about whack job assholes ...I just don't think thats the norm.
I have to disagree, as much as it saddens me. I think that it is very common to have someone turn on another person for a variety of reasons. It happens MUCH more often than most people believe, and as I'm beginning to work in the counseling field I'm seeing more and more instances of total dessimation of one person by another for many (ridiculous) reasons.

Sometimes it's a control thing, sometimes it's a response to make the other person the "enemy" to avoid any feelings of guilt about one's own actions or even to avoid feeling any sadness about loss.

Emotions can be powerful, and people will do all kinds of horrible things to avoid them...
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Old 01-06-2012, 08:44 PM
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BrigidsDaughter BrigidsDaughter is offline
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I also have to disagree with Dinged here. A dear friends wife cheated on him, using my besties from high school as transportation (unknowingly on their part), got knocked up by a 3rd guy after playing it up to everyone she talked to about how mean my friend was being at the time. Now they are divorcing, she is living with guy #3 and pregnant again. After signing an affidavit and having it notorized stating she wasn't seeking support, she showed up to court and told the judge their daughter might not be his AND she was seeking full support because she is pregnant again and her new guy isn't working either. Thankfully the judge sees how crazy she is, but in NY being crazy isn't enough of a reason for my friend to get custody. He's lucky he gets weekend custody and she is the one who screwed up.
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Old 01-06-2012, 08:45 PM
dingedheart dingedheart is offline
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So whack job asshole-ism is the norm.

I'm not exposed to divorcing couples in any professional way ...my exposure is personal friends and acquaintances and a sister in law. ...who was cheated on repeatedly. I guess this doesn't really surprise me though.
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Old 01-06-2012, 09:36 PM
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MindfulAgony MindfulAgony is offline
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It's just a sad story. Knowing the parties involved, it baffles me. Do help if you can. What's happening is wrong on so many dimensions. I hope that her husband and his other partner come to see more clearly and lose the need to hurt, control and shame.
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“Instead of getting better and better at avoiding, learn to accept the present moment as if you had invited it. And work with it instead of against it. And making it your ally rather than your enemy.”
-Pema Chodron
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