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Old 01-07-2010, 03:29 PM
FreeandUnited FreeandUnited is offline
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Default Can a loner by polyamourous?

I posted this before, but somehow it's gone. Maybe because I posted it before I was "official"(?)

Anyway, what do you all think? Can someone who is a bit of a loner still be polyamourus?
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Old 01-07-2010, 03:35 PM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Sure they can. After seeing the broad spectrum of approaches on here and in my local community, the only thing I truly feel is a minimum requirement to be polyamorous is the ability to engage in multiple intimate/romantic relationships simultaneously.

Nothing says you have to actually be in multiple relationships. That would be like saying you're only gay if you actually have a partner of the same sex right now.
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Old 01-07-2010, 03:44 PM
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I agree completely - if you feel you have the ability to having loving relationships with more than one person then why not?
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Old 01-07-2010, 04:21 PM
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Yes, someone who is solo can be polyamorous. If you had to be partnered to be polyamorous, it would mean your identity, who you are as a person, is contingent on other people and how others see you. That would not be a healthy.

~Raven~
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Old 01-07-2010, 04:22 PM
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Of course !
"polyamorous" should be viewed as an adjective - not as a verb
It's a way of viewing/understanding ourselves and the world.
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Old 01-07-2010, 06:05 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FreeandUnited View Post
I posted this before, but somehow it's gone. Maybe because I posted it before I was "official"(?)

Anyway, what do you all think? Can someone who is a bit of a loner still be polyamourus?
Being rather a hermit offline, I'd say "yes" -- for me, it tends to mean being polysaturated (what a word!) at two partners who are at least able to understand what introversion means and not drag me into their social calendars.
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Old 01-08-2010, 02:51 PM
glowinthedarkstars glowinthedarkstars is offline
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I have really bad social anxiety and depression which pretty much makes me a loner, and I am still open to polyamory,or have been in a poly relationship but dating one person. That said having depression kinda conflicts with the poly lifestyle at times but i dont think being a "loner" would rule out poly at all. if a "loner" could be mono, why not poly.
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Old 01-08-2010, 02:52 PM
glowinthedarkstars glowinthedarkstars is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lovefromgirl View Post
Being rather a hermit offline, I'd say "yes" -- for me, it tends to mean being polysaturated (what a word!) at two partners who are at least able to understand what introversion means and not drag me into their social calendars.
I like this! thanks for sharing =)
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Old 01-08-2010, 03:02 PM
Ceoli Ceoli is offline
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Having a romantic connection with someone doesn't require being a social butterfly. The same goes for having a romantic connection with more than one person.

I've known quite a few poly people who are pretty introverted and they have had some amazing loving relationships. So yeah, it's very possible and probably happens more than you think
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Old 01-08-2010, 03:57 PM
GroundedSpirit GroundedSpirit is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lovefromgirl View Post
for me, it tends to mean being polysaturated (what a word!)
WELL !!!!!!!!

Now there's a new and very important term to add to the dictionary. We talk a fair amount about that saturation.

Thank you !

(give a whole new meaning to poly-unsaturated)
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