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  #181  
Old 06-27-2013, 08:27 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Hoping it went well and no one drank too much! Looking forward to the update!
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  #182  
Old 06-28-2013, 01:58 AM
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fuchka fuchka is offline
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Thanks nycindie! It actually went okay. Ocean decided he would tell his parents who was who, when he thought it was best. This turned out to be afterwards, on the way home, when the three of them were alone together. So for the meal itself it was not explicit.

His folks were in good form, and the conversation was easy. Menrva had a mild curry that was too hot for her, which was a bit uncomfortable but mostly funny. She said it felt like a chilli creature living in her stomach

Grotto and I sat next to each other and were holding hands under the table. Even though it was mostly a big day for Ocean it felt like a big day for us too.

I was worried that his folks would be fine to meet our friends as friends, but wouldn't be comfortable with the idea that we were dating them. After the dinner, I left with Grotto because I had an early flight to catch, and Grotto's place is more convenient to get to the airport. So I haven't seen Ocean's parents since he told them. I did speak with them on the phone yesterday, though, and they were their cheery selves.

Seems like it's fine to them, no big deal. Haha. Wow.

Grotto was tipsy at dinner but functioned well for the most part. Alcohol is a familiar lubricant to him, and he's mostly okay with it. It was probably good things ended when they did though - I could tell he was fading a bit.

I feel it'll take a while to see how the dust settles on this. His parents didn't have much chance to process, really. Ocean has plans to visit them in a couple of months, which would be good timing to touch base again. But initial forecast is promising!

Because of the language barrier it's far better to talk with his ma in person. I do want to scope out her thoughts and feelings on this, but may have to wait til next time I see her. Til then, I guess I should make more of an effort to stay in touch (been meaning to anyways).

But. It's Done! Again, as Ocean said, "underwhelming."

Was joking to him that we don't have to feel shortchanged by the lack of drama around this. Telling my parents will more than make up for it. He replied "haha, yes, and then some"

Hmm. Burn that bridge another time
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  #183  
Old 06-28-2013, 02:12 AM
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fuchka fuchka is offline
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So, there's this girl. She studies archives. I want her to put me in a box and write a label on it.

It's someone I met off OkCupid. Have since disabled my account there - don't have time to date right now, what was I thinking! No, actually, I didn't go on there for dating, went to meet friends. But many people seem primarily there for dating, and - well - if you like sex and you like people and you like kissing and bodies and playing and unbounded conversations... there's a pot of potential there.

That said: potential? Is everywhere to me. What I need to work on is keeping myself healthy and pruned so I am pleased with my percentage of fruitfulness It feels less clinical than it perhaps sounds.

I think I have room for this flirtation, though. Y'know, just... one... more...

That old saying - "take it easy, but take it"
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  #184  
Old 07-09-2013, 09:53 AM
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fuchka fuchka is offline
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Archive Girl is awesome. I... don't know what's going on there physically (we haven't kissed or held each other, even) but I love talking with her, unpacking and repacking thoughts and experiences with the ease of old friends doing laundry together, folding shirts and matching socks.

Grotto's still so bruised. He's been awash with chemicals and comedowns, and his moods haven't been kind to him. I've been talking with him much more recently, once or twice a day, and writing e-mails too. I'm also buying a three month rail pass which will allow me to visit regularly. Travel was getting too expensive to do enough of... Long distance has been so rough this time around.

It's a long train journey (11 hours each way) but I'll do it overnight so I can have four days and three nights in the city with my Boys every two weeks or so. Yup. See how that goes.

I'm also scouting for work back there too... Seems like I might be onto something, but it's too early to tell at this stage.

I caught up with Grotto's friend (who I slept with) the other day, for the first time after our crash landing. I was ultra cautious... I'm not sure whether I should see him. I like him! And it's fun to catch up. We went rock climbing, and grabbed food and a couple of beers afterwards. I waited with him for his train. It was a cold night, and he was shivering... Fuck, dude. I couldn't stand there... Hadn't touched him all night but I gave him a bear hug from behind, and said "sorry I can't not be maternal." I think it wasn't feeding any sexual tension, but I have to be so careful.

Hmm.

More later, I just got room service! Pumpkin soup, yum. I'm on a work trip to a rural location, and had a big day of meetings today. Treating myself to some downtime. Got a travel allowance so may as well decompress
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  #185  
Old 07-19-2013, 06:35 AM
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fuchka fuchka is offline
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Default This is one end

Iím going to start a new blog for a couple of reasons at least. Firstly, I dislike how the title of this one doesnít fit when things are rough. Secondly, I had a few false starts on here in terms of naming people and pacing the narrative. Iíd like to try again afresh.

This has been something Iíve been thinking of doing for a while, and if I don't try it, I won't know if was a good idea

I may still dabble in this sandpit for a while. See what happens. Thanks for everyone who's journeyed here with me so far.

A final point: ratings. Itís a strange thing to have your blog rated. Iíd like to not notice and not give a shit, but I find that I do notice and I do give a shit. Bleargh.

Obviously I donít know why people have rated this blog a particular way. But I do know that if I do the best I can, and write in a way that pleases me, it wonít really matter what anyone elseís opinion is. I believe that peopleís judgment of me bothers me only as much as Iím disappointed in my own efforts. So, take two.
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  #186  
Old 07-19-2013, 03:03 PM
Nox Nox is offline
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Don't worry about ratings. People really like to get their inner jerk out when they are anonymous. I've certainly enjoyed your stories and writing.
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  #187  
Old 07-22-2013, 06:12 PM
opalescent opalescent is offline
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Hey, did you know you can totally rate yourself? I gave my blog 5 stars because I could!

Plus, I think blogs and posts can get randomly rated. It's also my sense that rating is not a thing here. No one has mentioned they only read 5 star posts or blogs in the time I've spent here. In fact, except for peope wondering why their blogs are rated, it doesn't come up at all. So if your blog is poorly rated, it might be random, and even if it's not, don't give a shit.

Enjoying both!

Last edited by opalescent; 07-22-2013 at 06:14 PM. Reason: style
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  #188  
Old 07-23-2013, 03:13 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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I don't think most people really even notice ratings.
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Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me. ~Bryan Ferry
"Love is that condition in which another person's happiness is essential to your own." ~Robert Heinlein
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  #189  
Old 07-28-2013, 01:53 AM
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fuchka fuchka is offline
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Thanks evad, opalescent & nycindie for your comments re: ratings - appreciated your perspectives!

It really wasn't a "I think I should care about this" feeling, but more a "wow, I care about this only because I feel I could have started my blog off better and I want to try again." You know, when something seemingly unimportant bothers you because it's being triggered from a real place (however minor)?

I often find it simpler to kick an emotion like that by just dealing directly with the source, esp if it's been lingering awhile and not dying off despite regular applications of rationality.
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